When I am at work I can be trusted with 44 tonnes of a slow travelling missile carrying millions of pounds of goods a week and nothing will go wrong, I will be in full control all the time and be trusted to get on with the job to the best of my ability and return with not a load spilt, all equipment in perfect working order and intact and in a reasonably clean condition with all notes signed and all paperwork done properly but when i get home it goes to rat ■■■■!
So why is it when I have the 5 ½ months old grandson and the wife is at work and I have to feed him that I am not in control at all? He is!
I have just given him his food, he has been on solids now for about a month and when the wife does it it looks so easy to do, my words as she walked out the door “we’ll be fine!”
How wrong was I? Now we have finished spooning the horrible looking contents into his ever open and wanten mouth I have numerous jobs to do,
Clean the grandson, he is covered in bright orange cottage pie and rice pudding from the top of his head to his socks (don’t ask me how; I’m only a truck driver not a quantum physicist!)
Wipe the high chair as that is covered in bright orange cottage pie
Put my clothes in the dish washer as I am also covered in bright orange cottage pie
Wipe the computer monitor as that is covered in bright orange cottage pie
Clean the carpet as that is covered in bright orange cottage pie
And my final job, and I have a feeling the dog will not like this one …bath the dog as he ended up wearing the bowl that was knocked off the high chair while I was grabbing the out of reach baby wipes.
I cant wait for the wife to come home again, she is only at work for 3 ½ hours today but I’m guessing this is going to seem like a life time!
Any tips? Apart from don’t feed him while the wife is at work!
I have the adventure of changing his nappy after all the jobs are done, I’m dreading to think what will go on!
Same for me most Saturdays, not feeding a baby but doing HOUSEWORK, looking after my boy and general pottering around as GF away to work. Just shows as to what they have to ut up with, but hey it is the 21st century.
scottishcruiser:
Same for me most Saturdays, not feeding a baby but doing HOUSEWORK, looking after my boy and general pottering around as GF away to work. Just shows as to what they have to ut up with, but hey it is the 21st century.
i know what your saying and it is right but i guess us men just arent cut out for it really, i never get stressed at work, traffic doesnt bother me and if i am looking at a night out because it has taken me 4 hours to get tipped/loaded it doesnt bother me,
but today my stress levels are up in the air, the only thing that will calm him down is having winnie the pooh theme tunes on the computer while i’m doing things, does anybody have a winnie the pooh CD with all the tunes on it so i can plonk him in the front room with teh stereo on while i do my other jobs, (the dog still needs a bath but that can wait, i think he has got most of it out and seems to like the taste)
garnerlives:
Giblsa:
and me if we will all fit in!
must have a big kitchen to fit a washer of that size in
garnerlives:
just thought you could have used a supersoaker type approach to it■■? God i used to love those things,oh to be a nineties kid again
i was contemplating getting the pool out, filling it up and sticking the lot in there with some washing up liquid and leaving it to soak for a while!!!
not a good idea with the little one i guess but the dog would enjoy it! he is lay on teh decking in the sun panting like mad!
And why IS it that all baby food seems to be orange, regardless of whatever flavour it’s supposed to be?
And why does children’s food appear to contain molecules that seem to be magnetically opposed to ending up in the child’s mouth, but which allows the meal to be attracted to every other solid surface within a twenty foot radius of the junor diner, where it adheres with a tenacity that only acid will remove?
Seems like you dont have your ADR ticket or at least an understanding of the CDG (containment of dangerous goo) regs.
The food is deliberately coloured orange to warn you of its explosive nature, hence the redecorating you now need to do. Washing down with copious amounts of water will definitely help as will calling te emergency services (sister, cousin, mother, bar maid); but DO NOT call the TM (tots mother) as this will only prove your lack of the right ‘ticket’. Dont forget there is a 6.2 at the exhaust end of the child that may include 2.1 if your not quick
