Sir +:
I think we should close this thread now.Nobody can compete with Bigvern,as his sig.proves
'Spouting ■■■■■■■■ since 1967 ’
■■■■ straight! 
NathanB:
I wont see coloured faces tomorrow as I deliver in High Wycombe.
Surely that’s a racist comment rather than MMTM■■? Maybe I missed the point?
bigvern1:
Sir +:
I think we should close this thread now.Nobody can compete with Bigvern,as his sig.proves'Spouting ■■■■■■■■ since 1967 ’
■■■■ straight!
Good year 1967 - Same year I was born Or so MMTM
m4rky:
NathanB:
I wont see coloured faces tomorrow as I deliver in High Wycombe.Surely that’s a racist comment rather than MMTM■■? Maybe I missed the point?
What does mmtm stand for?
NathanB:
m4rky:
NathanB:
I wont see coloured faces tomorrow as I deliver in High Wycombe.Surely that’s a racist comment rather than MMTM■■? Maybe I missed the point?
What does mmtm stand for?
My Mate Told Me
MMTM he saw Lord Lucan riding Shergar, whilst carrying Jimmy Hoffa’s briefcase!
bigvern1:
MMTM he saw Lord Lucan riding Shergar, whilst carrying Jimmy Hoffa’s briefcase!
Yep and I bet Elvis was steering the UFO at the time too - Now that must be true
That our load bonus scheme is legal.
dar1976:
NathanB:
m4rky:
NathanB:
I wont see coloured faces tomorrow as I deliver in High Wycombe.Surely that’s a racist comment rather than MMTM■■? Maybe I missed the point?
What does mmtm stand for?
My Mate Told Me
Yep you know the stories - MMTM that whilst he was in the RDC waiting room last week he heard that it was illegal to spend a night out in a day cab as the height was well below 7’ 6" which infringes on his human rights so therefore can sue the Belgium Government
What about the blx that so called fitters come out with,my favorite is “dont worry about that cracked screen,air leak,leaky rad,spurious rattle etc…etc… cos its coming in next week and you are getting a hire vehicle while we sort everything.”
Hear this one most weeks from the same bloke with a straight face,shame on him.
m4rky:
davepenn54:
I used to work for MI6/SIS/SASOh sheet I’ve told you all now so I’m going to have to seek you all out individually, lock you in a big red bag/holdall and leave you in the bath
Sorry guys it’s probably time to get your affairs in order and get that will written coz the Manchurian destruct programme in my head has now been activated
Regards
Dave Penn;Impressive - Dave how did you make it look like the bag was locked form the inside??
Good job fella
Oh come on m4rky I’m not going to fall for that old trick, all I can say is that you will more than likely find out how it is done very, very soon 
But here’s one MMTM that when he is 30/45 mins from base and run out of driving time (10hrs) as long as he rings boss and tells him and then get’s said boss to say it’s OK to run in even though truck is empty, so no real security risk and he hasn’t been in an unforseen delay, he’s ok to do it I tried to tell him that you really only could do that type of thing very occasionally but he was not having it and insisted that he was right.
Regards
Dave Penn;
NathanB:
That our load bonus scheme is legal.
No sorry this is far to serious for this thread and also may be true so it is also banned - Be a real trucker and make some ■■■■■■■■ up - everyone else does
davepenn54:
Oh come on m4rky I’m not going to fall for that old trick, all I can say is that you will more than likely find out how it is done very, very soon
Nuff said
davepenn54:
But here’s one MMTM that when he is 30/45 mins from base and run out of driving time (10hrs) as long as he rings boss and tells him and then get’s said boss to say it’s OK to run in even though truck is empty, so no real security risk and he hasn’t been in an unforseen delay, he’s ok to do itRegards
Dave Penn;
Now we’re talking that’s a true MMTM
Harry Monk:
I missed the Herald of Free Enterprise by half a minute.
I was actually on it and jumped over the side and swam back to the dock when I saw that they’d left the front doors open.I also told the enquiry that I’d told the Captain that the doors had been left open before I jumped and he told me I was talking bollox.They covered all that up.
m4rky:
NathanB:
That our load bonus scheme is legal.No sorry this is far to serious for this thread and also may be true so it is also banned - Be a real trucker and make some ■■■■■■■■ up - everyone else does
The Harrier jet that crashed near Tackley a few years back was stopping for a nutricious meal at Sturdys Castle Inn…
OK m4rky maybe you wont find out how the bag trick is done now I just love compliments thank you
Regards
Dave Penn;
I actually missed the ‘Herald’ by 2.5 yrs I was on it’s sister ship the ‘Spirit of Free Enterprise’ on the Saturday 0130 sailing from Cairnryan to Larne and I stopped in my cab on the bunk and if you think about it really hard it could have been me that might have lost my life if anything had happened in a completely different seaway at a completely different time but I have related this tale many a time to quite a few fella’s and then just walked away leaving them scratching their heads wondering WTF was he on about Maybe that’s what this game doe’s to yer, gotta get some laughs somewhere even if some people think you are a bit ‘chicken oriental’
Regards
Dave Penn;
Overheard a guy saying to another driver “if that load of cornflakes is late they’re going to pull the contract”. How he was privy to that info, I’ll never know!
I imagine he was fighting with a colleague later that day.
First one to identify the haulier gets a virtual pint. 
Police carry chalk.
I was told by another drive (maybe I’ll be sacked from this thread cos I really can’t call him a mate), that he was put on a bay for the night and the police chalked his wheels to prove he hadn’t been forced to move.
I asked him why the hell would a copper carry chalk? and honest to God he told me it was to draw round dead bodies.
The story is true but I still would strongly deny he was a mate.
The reason stobart drivers have stopped wearing ties is, a driver got his tie wrapped around the propshaft