Bullyling at work

UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUMS THE UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUM (INTERACTIVE)
61

I am sorry to hear about your situation, but I don’t understand why you are letting it affect you. Not giving a toss about what people think isn’t the easiest thing to learn, but once you have it, it changes everything.

I have dealt with bullying in school days and in the Navy, so I know the pain only too well, mental and (unfortunately) physical, but I haven’t met a lorry driver yet who would worry me, and i’ve met some right sorts. I’m confident that I could wrap a tyre iron round the cannister of even the fattest meat heads, should it come to that, but that isn’t the point is it? Unless you read Robert Heinlein, does violence ever really solve anything?

It’s a solitary job at the best of times, most bullies are covering up for an insecurity, so it is their problem, not yours. Don’t let yourself be a convenient offload for their issues. In the world of a lot of these guys, lorry driving is all they have to act superior over anybody, they are probably fat, have a small ■■■■■ and have a domineering and ugly wife who hates them, and kids who won’t pay them any mind once the opportunity to fly the nest arises. They spend their weekends knocking back the special brew, and waiting until they can get back to their cab to act superior all over again.

Don’t let people walk all over you, and it rarely if ever needs to come to violence. Though i’ll grant you in the simple world of most ‘wagon drivers’ violence is sometimes they only thing they understand, don’t lower yourself.

If it comes to violence then you have failed, to make an impact on somebody this way, you have to take them down hard, none of this “would you care to step outside thing, queensbury rules” its a quick blow with something hard that they (or you) won’t be getting up from, and a hospital menu in their hand. Probably an assault charge for you, and a no more job.

Have some confidence in who you are, what you do, and how you live your life. To hell with them.

The true alpha male in a given pack is rarely the one who feels he has to prove it all the time.

62

mucker85:
if that doesn’t work, go to your boss asking not to work with him as he keeps touching you and calling you his ‘good little boy’. slipping a couple of gary glitter cd’s and a ■■■■ plug into his bag when you know he’s going somewhere he’s likely to be searched will also do the trick.

What about the tub of Vaseline?

63

A word of advice I left my last job under a bit of a cloud after putting the weighbridge clerk on his arse and he tried having me nicked for it. Luckily you couldn’t see it properly on camera so the police wouldn’t bring charges so be a bit subtle :wink:

64

WildGoose:
If it comes to violence then you have failed, to make an impact on somebody this way, you have to take them down hard, none of this “would you care to step outside thing, queensbury rules” its a quick blow with something hard that they (or you) won’t be getting up from, and a hospital menu in their hand. Probably an assault charge for you, and a no more job.

I couldn’t agree more with the statement above.

You hear all this nonsense about sorting them out the good old fashioned way but unless you’re going to literally give them a near death experience it’s unlikely to detatch them from their delusion of grandeur because it’s simply that far ingrained.

You can learn the hard way to stop listening to all these idiots who counsel you to play devious tricks, give back verbal abuse and resort to violence or you can learn it the easy way.

“from all appearance of evil abstain ye” - 1 Thessalonians 5:22

65

Is there any need to quote ye olde booke of fairy stories?

66

Muckaway:
Is there any need to quote ye olde booke of fairy stories?

It’s like a rag to bull isn’t it. I’ll quote from anything if I think it has any value.

You just don’t need to react to these people and if you start doing malicious stuff you’re going to look like the instigator.
But Also, If advice has an appearance of evil, it’s usually bad advice.

67

bullys are cowards and they soon back down once challenged weather it be verbal or with violence dont bother with all the slap him stupid ■■■■ either tell him straight to pack it in do it clam without swearing or as i do nowjust laugh and say alright jack if u say so and crack on with your day
seen people like this many times and belive me they will ■■■■ up before you big style
ie at the old place an old bloke used to give the young lads ■■■■ all the time about how we were nothing compared to him bla bla bla then one day he drove and artic under a canopy and took it clean off was a great feeling when i seen him in the yard the day after i just greeted hi with a smile as to say not as ■■■■■■■ clever as you think are you :smiley: :smiley:
from that day on he went very quiet

68

If you go and talk to your boss now he might ask if you have got any evidence. As ■■■■■■ 00 mentioned, always write it down whenever he says something about you or to you along with the day,date, time, place and any names of witnesses. You might need things like this in the future and it’s no good just saying I think it was on a Wednesday but it could of been on a Friday. If you hit him and he goes crying to the boss it will probably be you who will lose your job. If he is always doing this then it shouldn’t take long before you have several instances that you can show your boss.
Good luck, I hope the {z.b.} dies of a heart attack.

69

I used to get alot of flak from some of the people I used to work with, one in particular I used to call diputs whenever he felt like having a go. I just used to walk away from him with a confused expression. I don’t think he ever did manage to work out “diputs” is “Stupid” backwards.

I once complained on an official level to HR about a couple of the formen’s harsh and unessesary attitude towards me. I was questioned about this by a manager a week or so later. Nothing was done about it and the words “well, this is a mans enviroment” were used. I’m happy not to work there anymore. I loved that job and I loved the industry. It was the people I had to work with on a daily basis that ruened it for me.

70

slackeye:
hi i have been working agency for a while now,there is a driver that works there and on jobs our paths cross , for some reason he does not like me ,that does not bother me at all its just he always takes the mick saying im usless in front of people i dread seeing him ,its always" oh no my day got worse for seeing you or they let any driver on here" once i was on a job and i was asked to pick a driver up on drighlington baypass that had run out of time, sure enough it was my nemesis,"oh no not you he barked i just said hi and went,felt bad cos i didnt say anything back,he really hates me for some reason?well today was the last straw , our agency put all the drivers on a coarse for a company they put us into,sure enough my mate was there,"oh no my day got worse,"and all day he just kept pulling me down and saying in was rubbish how i was nothing has good has him and he had done this that the lot,i wanted to kick the [zb] out of him, even the other blokes and the trainer were looking at me like what the hell? i dont know what to do ,say something to the agancy or front him out im no good with words and im no good at answering back to putdowns i just wlk off get mad and feel bad,im a bit slow on the uptake and tend to keep myself to myself really,i guess when i started driving 4 years or so ago i didnt have much experince, and was slow on jobs or reversing,i dunno just gets me down really

dont let it get you down, if he keeps on, ask him if he’d like a tea/coffee and add few laxitives thatll keep him busy and off your back for a day or 2 :smiley: ,but dont let it carry on mate,maybe he just cant help being a knob

71

bubsy06:
Or stand right in front of him, tell him you have had certain feelings for him for a while and it was about time you you let him know, slowly move your head towards his as if you were going to kiss him then with the reflexes of a cat give him a Glasgow kiss :grimacing:

To be honest, your thoughts are so close to mine.

I think the OP has misread the situation, he doesn’t hate you, he fancies you, next time he tries any put downs, explain that it may have worked at school, but it’s compliments that work on girls these days and you’re into girls so direct feelings elsewhere.

72

Forget all the politically correct crap, let him know that hes ■■■■■■■ you off big time and if he continues it will make his nose bleed.

73

Dont let him beat you why take humple pie your company must have a HR department complain about him.
If you have a supervisor tell him or wait till he ■■■■■ up the normaly do its not worth being out of work for.AT my last company before I retired we had all sorts of people work there and my boss used to say to the bullys out side now have a roll around the yard it wont affect your job lets just clear the air but before we do I will be the best 2nd you have ever met and to be honest
When he did the bully always hit the deck first ha ha ha never be alble to that now days.

74

In my experiance of some 39 years the biggest BULLY,s are the European Union and our own governments.Hours rules and HS things have been brought in and in all my years no one has asked me or any one I know what we think, the result is long silly hours lousey parking in most cases and this includes laybys at the side of the road that are to small and are no good na, dangerouse to take a proper rest,STATE BULLYING.

75

he wants a reaction so dont give him one. completely blank anything he says and he will soon get bored. its just words, they mean nothing so dont let them get to you

76

Best way to deal with aholes like that is when they say anything derogatory, look at them, shake your head, smile/laugh and look away, say nothing, it will get right on their ■■■■.

77

Don’t be tempted to ‘bite back’, if you do it will be Your character damaged, & this could well have a knock on effect on your career & blacken your name, (as it doesn’t take long for word to spred). Also if you hit him, there is every chance he would have you done for assult, & compensation, & this will leave you with a black mark on your career!! along with a hole in your earnings!!
Such matters are best dealt with by ignoreing him totaly, bit like water off a ducks back, unless you realy need to ask about something ‘workwise’ only , & make a complaint in a formal manner to your employer. ■■■■■■00 came up with some usefull ideas, as did some of the others too. I hope things get sorted for you at work , it’s not nice working under those conditions, just remember to keep your cool, & do things ‘by the book’ ,that way it keeps you in the best light!! :wink: :smiley:

78

as usual you get the usual, batter him etc posts from the heroes on here who either just talk rubbish or dont consider the consequences, SOMEONE I KNOW has been in the very situation youre talking about a long time ago, and the way he resolved it was by sitting in his car in the park until he came out to go home, walked over to him with the wheel brace asked him whos the [zb] smartarse now? the usual banter starts up “you know i was only jokiing mate” etc etc, one broken leg later and yes the coppers knocking on the door, the result being a his word against his situation and old chap never even to be seen or heard again as he couldnt work for a while

pretty risky step to take but its probably the most effective one

79

tell him my day just got better by seeing how much it’s p*ssing you off us working together.
i love pricks like him.

80

They say you get one in every job :unamused: I tend to get abit of hassle as I have a baby face yet I’m 27 but they think I’m about 12 half the time :laughing: Some like to walk over and boss what they think are the kids around some don’t have respect

I lost a job once after losing the plot to some idiot, well I went for him then walked out to save the boss from sacking me. Not worth your job mate just ride it out until you can find another job thats what I should of done, Jobs are rare these days