carryfast-yeti:
not much use to the OP now…but for anyone else about to go through a break-up,avoid involving the CSA (or whatever they are called now) and sort the financial agreement out with your ex. the CSA don’t have to be involved.
But there would, unfortunately, appear to be a trend where the ex partners go through the CSA out of spite, not realising that they don’t get all the money that the father is paying
Harry Monk:
tommy t:
They cannot take away your HGV entitlementNot directly, but they can apply to a magistrates court to have your driving licence revoked, see link below.
Just checked updated legislation and they ( the courts) apparently can disqualify someone for upto 2 yrs for non-payment , what a joke that is, more proof that the lunatics really are running the asylum , So non payment , driving ban fathers can no longer get to work or can no longer actually work, So if they did this just how do the dumb asses in office think they will get any payment then ? oh i know put them in prison, paid for by the tax payer , and they are dumb enough to still expect payment, they would get the f off tablet from me
I had 19 years of csa
Got court to give me parental responsibilities
The ■■■■■ ignored the door or had various excuses
After five years of that i gave up .these women want more than money ,its about there vindictive
Sides ,sonetimes spurred on by the new partner
They might have flash audis, but its you thats paying for them .You must take this to court and demand to have the child 3days a week then get her csad to cover your costs .
My lad hates me through his hidious mother and that bs csa crap .
not sure how it (csa)works these days ,but when I was paying it didn’t matter how much I paid the kids were no better off ,my payments were simply deducted from any benefits the ex got . we agreed that I would pay her a less amount and take responsibility for buying clothes ,shoes etc . although it used to nark me that I would hand over money for £20 trainers only to pick them up the following weekend and see the £5 pair they actually got 
as for access I could have as much as I wanted , they cramped her “social” life . the only advice I can offer the op is try going through the courts for access .
The CSA equivalent over here would not hesitate to take away your licence which I find stupid. A man needs to earn money to live and pay for his family or estranged children. Take away the mans only means of earning money to may child support and wonder why he hasn’t paid 
probably the best advice is to avoid women at all costs
I won’t go into the rights and wrongs of whether an absent father should pay child maintenance, but if an ex-partner did wish to minimise his outlay then the best way to do it would be to do agency work through their own limited company, pay themselves a minimal monthly salary and the remainder as dividends which the CSA can’t touch due to the unpredictability of their nature.
OP - is your ex on benefits ? - I ask because if they are then all that will happen is that they reduce the benefits by the amount they receive from you so making them no better off - just makes you worse off … and saves the public a bit of money of course
ROG:
OP - is your ex on benefits ? - I ask because if they are then all that will happen is that they reduce the benefits by the amount they receive from you so making them no better off - just makes you worse off … and saves the public a bit of money of course
Hi ROG no mate, she does care work. Her bloke buys her the cars though his dad owns a big solar panelling company not that his income matters. If I could get on the ■■■ tankers or Petrol I would be happy and be able to pay for everyone to live nicely but no ones taking on tank newbies because of PDP.
Harry Monk:
I won’t go into the rights and wrongs of whether an absent father should pay child maintenance, but if an ex-partner did wish to minimise his outlay then the best way to do it would be to do agency work through their own limited company, pay themselves a minimal monthly salary and the remainder as dividends which the CSA can’t touch due to the unpredictability of their nature.
Funny you have mentioned this mate, I changed with my agency from PAYE to Nova. Nova have sent me my welcome pack through today and my company name 
. Im not sure if Id be able work it around these though or if id have to do my own books.
Look to everyone who thinks im coming across as deadbeat I’m not saying I’m not willing to pay anything I just don’t want to pay £200 a week to clear the arrears. They were taking £190 off me a week when I was with wincanton based on me earning £14k I was doing 28k at the time so can you imagine what they would take from 28k■■? Its all on there terms yet its my pocket the money is coming from it should be upto what I think I can afford. I’ll sort it out sooner or later but with no access to me its dead money, he won’t benefit by me handing more cash over I’ll be lining her pockets.
carryfast-yeti:
probably the best advice is to avoid women at all costs
Or at least pull out in time. Its probably the most expensive tool a man can own.
carryfast-yeti:
probably the best advice is to avoid women at all costs
My mate says “snakes with ■■■■”. I’m politically correct so I couldn’t possibly agree. 
Williams9881:
Harry Monk:
I won’t go into the rights and wrongs of whether an absent father should pay child maintenance, but if an ex-partner did wish to minimise his outlay then the best way to do it would be to do agency work through their own limited company, pay themselves a minimal monthly salary and the remainder as dividends which the CSA can’t touch due to the unpredictability of their nature.Funny you have mentioned this mate, I changed with my agency from PAYE to Nova. Nova have sent me my welcome pack through today and my company name
Look to everyone who thinks im coming across as deadbeat I’m not saying I’m not willing to pay anything I just don’t want to pay £200 a week to clear the arrears. They were taking £190 off me a week when I was with wincanton based on me earning £14k I was doing 28k at the time so can you imagine what they would take from 28k■■? Its all on there terms yet its my pocket the money is coming from it should be upto what I think I can afford. I’ll sort it out sooner or later but with no access to me its dead money, he won’t benefit by me handing more cash over I’ll be lining her pockets.
The sooner you accept the fact you will be paying then the sooner you’ll sort it out and move on with your life. I make Harrys advice spot on, thats what i did. I still pay £5 per week and my youngest is 26 years old. In retrospect i wish i’d of sorted it out sooner. I could of done, but like you… it was a point of principle. I’ve another few years to go too !!! 
Regarding wether you think its dead money, or if she’s minted or not…you’ll find out when or if you have another kid just how expensive they are…
Oh, your question… yeah if they think you are purposley avoiding paying them, they’ll take your licence. That shouldn’t be a worry to you though, if your kid can live on less than what the Government says he’s entitled too, then so can you.
Ive got 2 kids with my girlfriend and Im pretty sure they both don’t cost me half as much as the csa would be taking. Im going to sort it anyway im going to ring nova see if theres a fiddle then ring the csa.
Harry Monk:
carryfast-yeti:
probably the best advice is to avoid women at all costsMy mate says “snakes with ■■■■”. I’m politically correct so I couldn’t possibly agree.
Or…
‘If it’s got ■■■■ or wheels - it’s trouble’…
But I like the…
'If it floats, flies or ‘F’s… You’re better of renting it. It’s just a money pit that’ll never be happy’…
P.S…
GO TO EFFIN COURT Too!!!
To show you now mean business…
As for the money side of things… You’re paying X amount, and it hurts. There’s just no getting away from it.
Any government dept / agency doesn’t have a clue of ‘real world’ cost of living etc, they just think of a number, think it looks good, then adds a bit more on ‘just to be sure’…
You WILL have to pay (something) regardless. ■■■■ I know, but if you don’t, it’ll only get worse - a lot worse…
As others have said though, go S/E, limited, or whatever. (But the CSA may question why suddenly the ‘change’ to this??)
I know a few who do that (in other types of jobs), so they can get full whack child benefits, working benefits - or just any benefit they can get their hands on…
Yet plead poverty, but live in a very desirable area / estate with the flash car / lifestyle…
That’s the problem in this country, the honest ones get shafted, yet the crooked ones get away with it…
Colin_scottish:
The CSA dont care about you they just want the money from you.Even if your living in hardship they wont care if your were made homeless.But if you have dependent children living with you they have to take them in to account with the amount they take from you each week.
Of course they want their money, why should my taxes subsidise other peoples’ offspring? It’s bad enough we waste money in foreign aid when we can’t care for pensioners without robbing them of their cash and property.
More Ale:
Colin_scottish:
The CSA dont care about you they just want the money from you.Even if your living in hardship they wont care if your were made homeless.But if you have dependent children living with you they have to take them in to account with the amount they take from you each week.Of course they want their money, why should my taxes subsidise other peoples’ offspring? It’s bad enough we waste money in foreign aid when we can’t care for pensioners without robbing them of their cash and property.
If a pensioner has got cash and property how are they being robbed if they have to pay for there own care
mac12:
More Ale:
Colin_scottish:
The CSA dont care about you they just want the money from you.Even if your living in hardship they wont care if your were made homeless.But if you have dependent children living with you they have to take them in to account with the amount they take from you each week.Of course they want their money, why should my taxes subsidise other peoples’ offspring? It’s bad enough we waste money in foreign aid when we can’t care for pensioners without robbing them of their cash and property.
If a pensioner has got cash and property how are they being robbed if they have to pay for there own care
Because they’ve paid for that care in taxes. Or they would have if people paid up for their own kids.
Seen this and thought you should have a read Williams9881. It was written by an American woman called Carolyn, but might let you see how utterly selfish your attitude towards the cost of bringing YOUR child up is. Maybe once you read it, you’ll put as much or more effort into seeing your wee boy as you are in trying to avoid paying for him. I’m not simply trying to bash you for your attitude mate, I’m just trying to get you to see the negative consequences of your actions and do something about it. Pay for him and try to see him, not because you want to ■■■■ your ex off for making you pay your way, but because that wee boy needs his Daddy.
Dear men who complain about paying child support because she’s taking “your” money & spending it on “herself”:
Ask yourselves this: other than paying child support, what else are you doing for your kid?
How many times have you taken your kid to school and picked him up? Talked to his teachers about how he’s doing, socially & academically? How much homework do you help with? Do you know the names of his best friend, his best friends’ parents, the little girl he has a crush on, the kid he hates? How many playdates do you supervise every week? How many school trips have you chaperoned?
How many nights have you rushed home from work, exhausted, and then had to get dinner on for him? Where are you when he is asking a million questions while you’re trying to get him off to bed so you can take care of your own responsibilities, like paying the bills, or doing some laundry? How many nights has your child gotten out of his bed and crawled into yours because he was having nightmares and couldn’t sleep?
How many doctors’ appointments have you taken him to? How many times have you left your job because he suddenly spiked a fever at school, or had an asthma attack and forgot his inhaler? How many nights have you spent with him in the pediatric ER because he fell, or started throwing up, or just didn’t look right and your instincts said, get him to a doctor right away?
Any system can be abused. Just as not all dads are deadbeats, some mothers are selfish and spend every dime that comes their way on themselves – whether on their appearance, their new man, or their drug habit. If that describes your situation, your child is in danger and you owe it to your child to alert the authorities. If you’re in a position to provide better care, you owe it to your child to seek custody.
The abusers exist, but they are not representative of most women who receive child support. I cringe when I hear comments like, “I pay for my kid and every time I see her, her hair and nails are tight.” If she works or has another source of income, what makes you think she’s spending “your” child support money on her hair and nails? Is she not supposed to be groomed? Would you prefer to see her with chipped nails and a raggedy weave, just so you know she’s not spending a dime of that support check on herself?
Courts split responsibility for taking care of the child’s financial needs between the parents according to income, per a predefined formula. In cases where the child’s father makes more than the mother, courts will expect him to carry the lion’s share of the financial burden. When she makes more money she bears most of the burden. And yet, even in those cases, men still complain about paying the tiny portion the court deems to be their fair share. They’ll say, “she makes enough to take care of the kids. She don’t need my money.” To the selfish ■■■■■■■■ who think like that, I say – grow up.
A lot of men resent the fact that child support goes towards expenses like rent and utilities, as if a child doesn’t also need a safe, warm place to live. If a mother is spending $500 per month to take care of your child, and you contribute $200, that means she contributed $300. If she happens to also spend $200 on her hair, that does not necessarily mean she’s spending “your” $200 on her hair. It may mean that, thanks to your contribution, she has some income left over to treat herself to hair appointments. So? Who’s clocking what you do with the rest of your money that isn’t going towards child support? Oh. Once you pay child support, it’s not your money anymore. Let it go."
Malky80:
Seen this and thought you should have a read Williams9881. It was written by an American woman called Carolyn, but might let you see how utterly selfish your attitude towards the cost of bringing YOUR child up is. Maybe once you read it, you’ll put as much or more effort into seeing your wee boy as you are in trying to avoid paying for him. I’m not simply trying to bash you for your attitude mate, I’m just trying to get you to see the negative consequences of your actions and do something about it. Pay for him and try to see him, not because you want to ■■■■ your ex off for making you pay your way, but because that wee boy needs his Daddy.Dear men who complain about paying child support because she’s taking “your” money & spending it on “herself”:
Ask yourselves this: other than paying child support, what else are you doing for your kid?
How many times have you taken your kid to school and picked him up? Talked to his teachers about how he’s doing, socially & academically? How much homework do you help with? Do you know the names of his best friend, his best friends’ parents, the little girl he has a crush on, the kid he hates? How many playdates do you supervise every week? How many school trips have you chaperoned?
How many nights have you rushed home from work, exhausted, and then had to get dinner on for him? Where are you when he is asking a million questions while you’re trying to get him off to bed so you can take care of your own responsibilities, like paying the bills, or doing some laundry? How many nights has your child gotten out of his bed and crawled into yours because he was having nightmares and couldn’t sleep?
How many doctors’ appointments have you taken him to? How many times have you left your job because he suddenly spiked a fever at school, or had an asthma attack and forgot his inhaler? How many nights have you spent with him in the pediatric ER because he fell, or started throwing up, or just didn’t look right and your instincts said, get him to a doctor right away?
Any system can be abused. Just as not all dads are deadbeats, some mothers are selfish and spend every dime that comes their way on themselves – whether on their appearance, their new man, or their drug habit. If that describes your situation, your child is in danger and you owe it to your child to alert the authorities. If you’re in a position to provide better care, you owe it to your child to seek custody.
The abusers exist, but they are not representative of most women who receive child support. I cringe when I hear comments like, “I pay for my kid and every time I see her, her hair and nails are tight.” If she works or has another source of income, what makes you think she’s spending “your” child support money on her hair and nails? Is she not supposed to be groomed? Would you prefer to see her with chipped nails and a raggedy weave, just so you know she’s not spending a dime of that support check on herself?
Courts split responsibility for taking care of the child’s financial needs between the parents according to income, per a predefined formula. In cases where the child’s father makes more than the mother, courts will expect him to carry the lion’s share of the financial burden. When she makes more money she bears most of the burden. And yet, even in those cases, men still complain about paying the tiny portion the court deems to be their fair share. They’ll say, “she makes enough to take care of the kids. She don’t need my money.” To the selfish [zb] who think like that, I say – grow up.
A lot of men resent the fact that child support goes towards expenses like rent and utilities, as if a child doesn’t also need a safe, warm place to live. If a mother is spending $500 per month to take care of your child, and you contribute $200, that means she contributed $300. If she happens to also spend $200 on her hair, that does not necessarily mean she’s spending “your” $200 on her hair. It may mean that, thanks to your contribution, she has some income left over to treat herself to hair appointments. So? Who’s clocking what you do with the rest of your money that isn’t going towards child support? Oh. Once you pay child support, it’s not your money anymore. Let it go."
The OP, won’t know this because she is refusing access to the kid. End of the day … if u really wanted access to your child you would of gone to court long before …, sorry I have no sympathy at all …