bradfordlad9999:
No wonder you zb swore, the thread is from 2008. I remember posting in it then. 
Is Dave Dowling still about?
Used to do Southend to Nissan (Sunderland)back to Southend, re load ready to go back to Nissan with 10 mins average daily driving time left on a 13⊠any good. 
alfa man:
A story that did the rounds in my area in the mid 80âs.
I wonât name any names but the guy in question was quite well known as
a real character/chancer ,amongst other things he operated 4 or 5 trucks with fridges.
Now the story goes that he picked up a one off contract to shift a large amount of stuff from our area to the south, now not wanting to upset his exsisting customers by using all his trucks on the one off contract he decided to put 3 trucks on the contract and squeeze a bit more weight on them to get the job done.That posed a bit of a problem , the weigh bridge at Crawford .
As his "o"licence was already on a sticky wicket he needed to make sure none of his trucks got a pull. This is where it gets interesting , the weekend before he started the contract he took his fitters van down to Crawford and under the cover of darkness he welded up the weigh bridge.Pure quality
Not sure if you actually own an Alfa but if you do, it had better be a V6 and as for the story I think I beleive it and it is hilarious
This one is true I was in the steel works in Coatbridge loading when an Irishman backs in and says what length are the bundles, 20ft says I how much are you in for, 20ton says he and starts to lay timbers only on the back half of the trailer have you not enough timber for the front,oh I need to put the steel all on the back as I have a container with 17ton in it to pick up at container base in Coatbridge I was round there to put the container on but the queue was that big I came here so I will just put the steel a few inches back enough to clear the container. This was the early seventies when the gross weight was 32tons so he was going to be well over at 37tons probably grossing about the 50tons. Eddie.
erfguy:
This one is true I was in the steel works in Coatbridge loading when an Irishman backs in and says what length are the bundles, 20ft says I how much are you in for, 20ton says he and starts to lay timbers only on the back half of the trailer have you not enough timber for the front,oh I need to put the steel all on the back as I have a container with 17ton in it to pick up at container base in Coatbridge I was round there to put the container on but the queue was that big I came here so I will just put the steel a few inches back enough to clear the container. This was the early seventies when the gross weight was 32tons so he was going to be well over at 37tons probably grossing about the 50tons. Eddie.
Bet his steering and braking were interesting going back to the container depot 
This is a true story,I kid you not! Our depot was adjacent to the MOT Station at Milnthorpe and in the grounds of the station there was a large area of grass that was the sweetest (to a horse) you would ever find,free from artificial chemicals ect ect.Around 1980 when I had ,finally,got my-self a decent Standardbred harness horse,which I stabled in the depot and,at the time trained my-self I regularly at lunch times walked him from his stable into the Test Station and let him graze for half an hour or so on the lead rein.Well this particular lunch time Iâm stood near the entrance to Lane 1 (only had one lane!!) The horse is busy enjoying his sweet lunch when this bloke pulls in in a motor right up to the door ready to go in when the station started again.he leans out of his window and asks âwhat you doing mate?â So I says,âyou neednât think your next in mate,Iâm next !â âWhat you in for for mate?â I says âoh just to run him over the rollers for a brake test!â So without further ado this driver/mechanic gets out of his cab and strides into the station,then I heard the loudest guffawing and laughing in what was usually a bit of an austere atmosphere,a couple of the testers came rolling out of the door with tears streaming down their faces,this driver in all seriousness had enquired how was it possible to âroller brake test the horse that was waiting to enter the stationâ,the driver came back out having realised the âwind upâ and got back in his cab and if looks could have killed me and the horse we would have been dead on that grass !!! Happy Days Cheers Bewick.
Bewick:
This is a true story,I kid you not! Our depot was adjacent to the MOT Station at Milnthorpe and in the grounds of the station there was a large area of grass that was the sweetest (to a horse) you would ever find,free from artificial chemicals ect ect.Around 1980 when I had ,finally,got my-self a decent Standardbred harness horse,which I stabled in the depot and,at the time trained my-self I regularly at lunch times walked him from his stable into the Test Station and let him graze for half an hour or so on the lead rein.Well this particular lunch time Iâm stood near the entrance to Lane 1 (only had one lane!!) The horse is busy enjoying his sweet lunch when this bloke pulls in in a motor right up to the door ready to go in when the station started again.he leans out of his window and asks âwhat you doing mate?â So I says,âyou neednât think your next in mate,Iâm next !â âWhat you in for for mate?â I says âoh just to run him over the rollers for a brake test!â So without further ado this driver/mechanic gets out of his cab and strides into the station,then I heard the loudest guffawing and laughing in what was usually a bit of an austere atmosphere,a couple of the testers came rolling out of the door with tears streaming down their faces,this driver in all seriousness had enquired how was it possible to âroller brake test the horse that was waiting to enter the stationâ,the driver came back out having realised the âwind upâ and got back in his cab and if looks could have killed me and the horse we would have been dead on that grass !!! Happy Days Cheers Bewick.
Brilliant 
you just couldnât make than one up .
Calling toby or Limeyphil,where are youâ â ?
This thread is yours for the taking!!! 
Top
Re: collecting dead animals
by kr79 Ă» Fri Oct 07, 2011 3:48 pm
Back in 2003 I was driving a artic bulker on landfill work for a south London skip firm as well as our own rubbish we did a bit out of other skip yards and council transfer stations.
One firm we pulled out of was a dodgy rough as hell half caravan living people outfit who had a couple of old stables in the yard with a a couple of scaby sorry looking donkeys in there. One Thursday afternoon I went in there and one of the donkeys had keeled over and there was already a few flys buzzing round.
The Guvnor wasnât paying for the pet cemetery and came over and said alright if we put it on you. I said no way you canât send it down a landfill site so without blinking he pulled out a wad of cash that could have choked a donkey rolled of a 50 and said are you sure. The colour of money clouded my judgement so I took the 50 and said ok but donât take the â â â â with it. I pop down to the cafe come back and itâs loaded so I Pulled on to the weighbridge all ok so I just shut the easy sheet went back to the yard to park up.
Next morning I got in started the truck and instead of hearing a v8 scania fire up I got the ominous click of a knackerd starter motor and ended up in a spare lorry.
No work Saturday so it was Monday by the time muffin the mule was making his final voyage. 4-30 am Iâm in the yard and Iâm away down the old Kent road over blackheath down the a2 and off to the dartford tunnel. I got to the barrier and the attendant said your overheight. This wasnât a surprise as my trailer was 15 ft 6 and often something sticking ip would set the sensors off. So I said il go for the right hand tunnel she said no your to high for it pull in to the tanker bay and sort it out.
I pulled in to the bay climbed up to se the now rotting donkey rolled half on itâs back and two rigimorticed legs sticking well up in the air. I opened the easy sheet and tried pushing this stinking thing back on itâs side but it just kept rolling back over. I grabed one of the legs and tried bending it but it was solid as a oak tree.
By this time I was covered in sweat and flys and heard another truck pull up I looked down to see Tony a guy I worked with he climbed up and just said what the [zb]. Now there was two of us trying to roll the dead donkey and bend itâs legs with little sucsess.
He said il be back in a second and returned with a big hacksaw and handed it to me and just said crack on son. My face droped and I said what am I going to do withthat and he replied cut itâs [zb] legs off son. I said I canât he said I ainât and have you got a better idea so I set to cutting thrrough the rotting flesh and bone. I was heaving at the blood and maggots going every where but eventualt cut far enough to bend them over. I came down covered in blood with a swarm of flys round me and went through the tunnel and to the landfill at averley.
I tipped it out and the fixer driver jumped out of his d8 saying you canât tip that here and I had to give him 20 quid to keep his mouth shut.
Last edited by Colingl on Fri Oct 07, 2011 5:01 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Reason: Language edit, if it needs stars it ainât allowed.
Copied and pasted from when I posted it before
1984/85 i was working for tilcon motars out of poplar when all the london docklands was being rebuilt ,it was boom time we had more work than we could handle and when finished driving trucks all day we would operate plant and and machines at night getting a kip in when we could.it was a cold foggy morning as i made my way to the three rabbits pub at manor park at about 3.30 am then turned past the east london cemetery across wanstead flats.suddenly the fog parted and in the middle of the road stood an elephant(you dont get many of them in this neck of the woods).the fog closed in again and i sat there telling myself i was due some time off.Suddenly it bolted back my way and now i can see it for a second time now closer,theres a large chain around its neck and its towing a metal post along the road.suddenly theres a lot of shouting and hollering as 6 guys start to chase the thing across the grasslands,i moved off and three hundreds yards further along the fog parted to reveal Gerry cottles circus.He"d been tugging on the chain all night finally pulling the post out an was off on the trott.GOSPAL TRUTH THIS REALLY DID HAPPEN TO ME I PROMISE
Got a claim to fame? Reckon youâve done fastest trip? Favorite job you were on, who you used to work for, best trucks, any thing at all that could be interesting for everyone else. I,m looking for some to publish with your permission, on my website or even if i get enough, a book!!
One driver who works for HC Wilson, where iâm an office dweller, Flash is his name. He was teling me how he used to work for Bob Steward, he was driving a brand new yellow and blue 141 6x4 bought off a show stand. Working for Samson (now part of DFDS/DSV) out of denmark.
âOn a good trip and if the roads were clear you could just about Denmark to Calais in about 10 hours. 70mph all the way. Most of Stewards Scaniaâs had bus diffs put in the back axle, giving more spedd and less revs.â
Just one to get you started. Now share your favourite stories please, pics are welcome!!
that flash is full of â â â could nt do a good days graft in a dream,
Mr 141:
Got a claim to fame? Reckon youâve done fastest trip? Favorite job you were on, who you used to work for, best trucks, any thing at all that could be interesting for everyone else. I,m looking for some to publish with your permission, on my website or even if i get enough, a book!!One driver who works for HC Wilson, where iâm an office dweller, Flash is his name. He was teling me how he used to work for Bob Steward, he was driving a brand new yellow and blue 141 6x4 bought off a show stand. Working for Samson (now part of DFDS/DSV) out of denmark.
âOn a good trip and if the roads were clear you could just about Denmark to Calais in about 10 hours. 70mph all the way. Most of Stewards Scaniaâs had bus diffs put in the back axle, giving more spedd and less revs.âJust one to get you started. Now share your favourite stories please, pics are welcome!!
Here is an anecdote for you, a coach diff in a heavily loaded truck would still be on its way back 
It wouldnât pull a broody hen off its eggs.
Can you imagine any operator buying a V8 and then getting lapped by a bloke in a Mastiff or an F86? I canât imagine he would want to admit to that at the RHA conference.
I will wait to be shot down by the Polizei as he would have been for doing 112 kilometres in Germany 25 years ago
have heard that said about someoneâs motors before, often wondered as coach axles/diffs are probably only built/geared for pulling 10-12 tonnes
Yea iâm not sure either axles are supposedly designed for different weights, but your all getting carried away again as usual. The whole point of this link is to hear the stories and claims, not to say its a load of old trollope. We all know speaking to any driver ends up with a slightly fabricated story, thats what i like to hear, whether they are true or not doesnât really matter, so if youâve not got a story to add, how about you dont moan and groan and just keep quiet for once!!!
WARNING: THIS LINK IS INTENDED AS A BIT OF FUN, PLEASE KEEP AWAY IF YOU CANT ADD ANYTHING OF INTEREST
Mr 141:
Yea iâm not sure either axles are supposedly designed for different weights, but your all getting carried away again as usual. The whole point of this link is to hear the stories and claims, not to say its a load of old trollope. We all know speaking to any driver ends up with a slightly fabricated story, thats what i like to hear, whether they are true or not doesnât really matter, so if youâve not got a story to add, how about you dont moan and groan and just keep quiet for once!!!WARNING: THIS LINK IS INTENDED AS A BIT OF FUN, PLEASE KEEP AWAY IF YOU CANT ADD ANYTHING OF INTEREST
Why didnt you say you wanted stories about trips to the moon. I have heard so many, I could write a book
I heard about an owner driver from Liverpool (like me) who had an Iveco Turbostar (like me) who shipped out of Newhaven one Sunday evening, parked up outside 1st drop (Irun) Monday night.
Tuesday, delivered Irun, Vitoria, Logrono & Mendavia & ran to Madrid.
Wednesday, delivered Carmarma de Estruelas, 2 in Cos Lada, ran to Valencia & loaded La Pobla de Valbona. (guess what with?)
Thursday night, shipped out of Dieppe on the midnight & delivered 23 pallets of onions to Glasgow market 10pm Friday night and was back in my own bed before 5am Saturday morning. (I mean he was back in his own bed 
)
All of this was done without breaking any speed limits or any tachograph regulations.
Ross.
PS, if you believe the last paragraph you must still believe in the tooth fairy.
Mr 141:
Yea iâm not sure either axles are supposedly designed for different weights, but your all getting carried away again as usual. The whole point of this link is to hear the stories and claims, not to say its a load of old trollope. We all know speaking to any driver ends up with a slightly fabricated story, thats what i like to hear, whether they are true or not doesnât really matter, so if youâve not got a story to add, how about you dont moan and groan and just keep quiet for once!!!WARNING: THIS LINK IS INTENDED AS A BIT OF FUN, PLEASE KEEP AWAY IF YOU CANT ADD ANYTHING OF INTEREST
Youâll fit right in at Grove Lane with that attitude / persecution complex
Wheel Nut:
Why didnt you say you wanted stories about trips to the moon. I have heard so many, I could write a book
when the cloggie landed near the Sea of Tranquility, there was an F-Troop broken down and a Brit waiting for running money - is that the one Malc?
jj72:
when the cloggie landed near the Sea of Tranquility, there was an F-Troop broken down and a Brit waiting for running money - is that the one Malc?
I was thinking about the bloke who couldnt tip because his load wasnât on pallets. He went with the cloggie to the pub but there was no atmosphere