Retired Old ■■■■:
You should have bought one for Windrush, Steve. We would have had a whip-round to reimburse you for the cost but that would be against the spirit of this club.
And if that interfering Rigsby bloke thinks he’s going to fix me up with yet another “good woman” he can think again. It took me five long years to dig the tunnel to escape the last one- never again!
What did you used to dig that tunnel then? A (silver ) spoon…?
It was a plastic spoon. I wasn’t allowed anything hard or sharp.
rigsby:
Well casey , that puts me in mind of a much married , and divorced friend . when he went for a pee he would look down and say " If it weren’t for you you little sod i’d have been a millionaire by now " . He lost 3 businesses through women . I’m just jealous really , wed for 54 years and too old to move on .
Do you think it will last then? I’ve 57 years in and if she doesn’t buck up a bit there’ll be no 58.
We only live in a little one up and one cown cottage style hovel, Last Thursday I came home from the pub to her met by her and 2 16 year old granddaughters decorating the aforementioned hovel with ‘festive’ decorations…the place is like bloody Santas grotto.
rigsby:
Well casey , that puts me in mind of a much married , and divorced friend . when he went for a pee he would look down and say " If it weren’t for you you little sod i’d have been a millionaire by now " . He lost 3 businesses through women . I’m just jealous really , wed for 54 years and too old to move on .
Do you think it will last then? I’ve 57 years in and if she doesn’t buck up a bit there’ll be no 58.
We only live in a little one up and one cown cottage style hovel, Last Thursday I came home from the pub to her met by her and 2 16 year old granddaughters decorating the aforementioned hovel with ‘festive’ decorations…the place is like bloody Santas grotto.
Bah Humbug
Not quite the “welcome home” you had in mind eh
Come to think of it, probably was enough to turn round and go back as fast as ya can to that pub no doubt…
Another thing though, those bloody carts…who’s idea was it in the first place to write some non saying message on the back and wish them all the best…?
I very much doubt that there indeed was one person who’d just put the money where his mouth was… No wonder it’s always the ladies who write them cards…
My other half had a change of heart thursday and decided that after all we would have some festive decorations up . Being the true gentleman that i am i went to the shed and fetched her the step ladder . Dave
I cremated our old Tesco Value Xmas tree this morning at work. Mrs Muckaway wanted a new one (artifcial) and when Muckaway Jr asked “is it a real one?” I replyed in a humbug style of “well you can see it can’t you?”
Thank God school nativity (or should that be naivety?) is during the day.
After repairing the brakes on our nieces car this morning I had plans for some ‘me time’ this afternoon, alas the pouring rain scuppered those plans so I bit the bullet and wrote almost all the cards! Two books of stamps later all are done, just a few to give to the neighbours and carers but stamps not required on those. Still have the decorations to sort out ‘one day’ soon, oh what fun I will have then!!
The wife is no longer able to hold a pen Pete , but it looks like she’s still a dab hand with a whip though . Not necessarily a physical whip maybe but i’m sure women are born with one attached to their tongue . Dave
Our customers must be on an early wind down for Xmas as we’re so short of work that my boss had a rare day off and got roped into Xmas shopping.
He did also shop for truck and digger oil so I’ll let him off this once (I managed a full day driving two trucks).
windrush:
After repairing the brakes on our nieces car this morning I had plans for some ‘me time’ this afternoon, alas the pouring rain scuppered those plans so I bit the bullet and wrote almost all the cards! Two books of stamps later all are done, just a few to give to the neighbours and carers but stamps not required on those. Still have the decorations to sort out ‘one day’ soon, oh what fun I will have then!!
Pete.
That’s certainly not the kind of behaviour we expect from a member of the illustrious BH club. If you really HAVE to indulge in the Christmas card fiasco, surely you could have got one of your elves to tackle the job. Just to reiterate, “Writing Cards” is not an acceptable task for any member of the club and consequently I shall be calling for the committee to conduct a full enquiry into your actions.
windrush:
After repairing the brakes on our nieces car this morning I had plans for some ‘me time’ this afternoon, alas the pouring rain scuppered those plans so I bit the bullet and wrote almost all the cards! Two books of stamps later all are done, just a few to give to the neighbours and carers but stamps not required on those. Still have the decorations to sort out ‘one day’ soon, oh what fun I will have then!!
Pete.
That’s certainly not the kind of behaviour we expect from a member of the illustrious BH club. If you really HAVE to indulge in the Christmas card fiasco, surely you could have got one of your elves to tackle the job. Just to reiterate, “Writing Cards” is not an acceptable task for any member of the club and consequently I shall be calling for the committee to conduct a full enquiry into your actions.
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
pv83:
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
Sod off, still got the neighbours cards to write yet. Had to buy even more stamps today, £13+ for two books!! Anyway I will take my punishment like a man because, whatever you decide, I’m pretty sure that in my almost 66 years I will have had far worse to deal with than anything a load of (probably overweight) pensioners can dish out. Just don’t set your wives on me though, they all sound bloody scary!!
pv83:
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
Sod off, still got the neighbours cards to write yet. Had to buy even more stamps today, £13+ for two books!! Anyway I will take my punishment like a man because, whatever you decide, I’m pretty sure that in my almost 66 years I will have had far worse to deal with than anything a load of (probably overweight) pensioners can dish out. Just don’t set your wives on me though, they all sound bloody scary!!
pv83:
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
Sod off, still got the neighbours cards to write yet. Had to buy even more stamps today, £13+ for two books!! Anyway I will take my punishment like a man because, whatever you decide, I’m pretty sure that in my almost 66 years I will have had far worse to deal with than anything a load of (probably overweight) pensioners can dish out. Just don’t set your wives on me though, they all sound bloody scary!!
Pete.
All that money spent on stamps , you could have got your bike out and delivered them yourself . Shows how the rich folks live down sunny Matlock , us poor folks up here struggling to keep body and soul together could have eaten for a month on that .
pv83:
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
Sod off, still got the neighbours cards to write yet. Had to buy even more stamps today, £13+ for two books!! Anyway I will take my punishment like a man because, whatever you decide, I’m pretty sure that in my almost 66 years I will have had far worse to deal with than anything a load of (probably overweight) pensioners can dish out. Just don’t set your wives on me though, they all sound bloody scary!!
Pete.
Sod off ■■ sod off ■■ In this season of ‘Goodwill to all men’ and you come up with sod off. And them to compound your scurrilous remarks you come up with ‘overweight pensioners’. How very dare you…only Mrs GOM can call me a fat b astard. …
Much more of this and we will assemble our wimmin and they will march on Matlock.
pv83:
I agree, an absolute unworthy task for a BH member, and not only that, but an absolute disgrace for the others members too… after a thorough enquiry, suitable punishment awaits…
Meanwhile…ahum…would you be so kind to write my cards as well…?
Sod off, still got the neighbours cards to write yet. Had to buy even more stamps today, £13+ for two books!! Anyway I will take my punishment like a man because, whatever you decide, I’m pretty sure that in my almost 66 years I will have had far worse to deal with than anything a load of (probably overweight) pensioners can dish out. Just don’t set your wives on me though, they all sound bloody scary!!
Pete.
Sod off ■■ sod off ■■ In this season of ‘Goodwill to all men’ and you come up with sod off. And them to compound your scurrilous remarks you come up with ‘overweight pensioners’. How very dare you…only Mrs GOM can call me a fat b astard. …
Much more of this and we will assemble our wimmin and they will march on Matlock.
grumpy old man:
Sod off ■■ sod off ■■ In this season of ‘Goodwill to all men’ and you come up with sod off. And them to compound your scurrilous remarks you come up with ‘overweight pensioners’. How very dare you…only Mrs GOM can call me a fat b astard. …
Much more of this and we will assemble our wimmin and they will march on Matlock.
That’s a blooming laugh, “march on Matlock” ha blooming ha! By the time they have done all their days work pandering to your every needs they will be too knackered to think about marching anywhere, plus if they do come they will probably ask me for tips about how to get some of you lads extracted from your comfy armchairs and to actually do some proper work for a change? “March on Matlock” eh, well shortly there will be new McDonalds opening to refresh them and a nice Premier Inn for them to rest in overnight (at your expense) so let them come if only for a break from drudgery!!!
It is my painful duty to call for a vote of “No confidence” in Mr Windrush. I am surprised, nay disappointed, that a founder member of this club should conduct himself in such a manner. Next thing we know he’ll be trundling around Matlock dressed in red with a false beard, singing carols and handing out mince pies. Will somebody please stop him before he damages the reputation of this club forever?
why am i now getting a mental picture of santa sitting on the sleigh,looking at a bag of carrots and 8 reindeers ■■■■■■■■ imagining what end he is going to ram them in once said reindeer starts slowing down…
It took me five long years to dig the tunnel to escape the last one- never again!
) spoon…?
Two books of stamps later all are done, just a few to give to the neighbours and carers but stamps not required on those. Still have the decorations to sort out ‘one day’ soon, oh what fun I will have then!! 
