in the 80s I was a van driver,i was belting down the M4 at around 80 and checked my mirror [o/s]I saw an old hearse bearing down on me in the middle lane,i had already passed an exit ramp so there was no more for about ten miles,looked again a few seconds later and nothing,checked behind me, still nothing,checked all around and still nothing,i know it did not come pass me,little bit freaked out by that I have to admit,not made up, it actually happened,maybe a warning,who knows
shartly after meeting my misses,she told me she was a witch…I dotnt believe her at first,then when we were driving along,she leaned over,stuck her tongue into my ear…and I turned into a layby…to even things up,i proceeded to put the willies up her, 
In the 90,s when I was approaching the Portuguese border in Spain, I would always see an old man in his eighties on a even older clapped out moped with no working lights late at night on a fast and busy road.
He would ride the moped and play his trumpet at the same time, was I seeing things on a one hit from Cherbourg to Lisbon?
He wore an old military long coat adorned with medals and other memorabilia.
I would laugh out loud as he drove in to oncoming traffic and swerving violently from one side of the road to the other , playing the Spanish national anthem or a trumpet solo.
All of a sudden I never saw him again, assuming a mad Porker on a mission flattened him.
Driving along at night I thought I spotted Wizbit. Turned out to be a midget womble carrying a bloody traffic cone.
Muckaway:
cargocargocargo:
"Hello fairies, how are you?Lymm truckstops’ lavatories attract a few of them too.
Long way from Oxfordshire eh. ?
arrived for work one satday morn as i walked in the yard i heard a noise just over in the woods behind yard, like a baby crying . i was the 1st to arrive and nobody else there . so i went looking, the crying seemed a bit farther on, i walked on ,stopped, waited , noise again,walked on farther . it was long grass and my clothes got wet thru with the dew . Eventually i gave up looking [maybe was a fox cub?] go back to the yard , fire up the space heater in the workshop,dry my clothes quickly in front of it -strip off starkers keeping an eye/ear out for anyone coming
but the heater made so much noise i never heard the boss AND HIS WIFE came in found me sitting bollock naked on a stool !
21 and just passed my test…1st trip…middle of the night,flat to the mat in a 180 gardner guy j4 mad for tar and king of the road…tappity tap tap tap on the roof right above my head (day cab)…middle of nowhere somewhere on the english south coast…keeps happening now and then…stops…roped and sheeted load of timber all seemed secure,so heads off again,5 mins later,tappity tap tap on the roof…same again,stops,out with torch. im shouting at mr invisible to come off the top of the load so i can chib him ( whilst simultaniously ■■■■■■■■ bricks hoping he wouldnt come down for the aforementioned chibbing)…nothing…then after more times of the same,i find a wee hole in the front of the sheet with a long thin dowel rod of 1/2 diameter wood poking through and the flatout speed plus the wind made it randomly tap the cab roof…hows that for being a fanny. 
I’m the fanny.
■■■■■■■ bags of confidential waste into the side door of the shredding wagon last week, I got a bit of a sweat on so took my hi-vis warm jacket off. There was a fence post right next to me so I just hung it on that. Mere seconds later I jumped out of me skin - I thought there was someone there standing right next to me!
It only happened three more times before I eventually moved the ■■■■■■ jacket to the cab!
Must be getting old. Merry Christmas everyone.