The man at the bar of the truck stop asked me
Are they actually real truckers on truck net
I said I donk know, never met any of them in person
Nah not many real truckers on here mate, I recently “came out” I,m a Truckvestite only at weekends, in the week I,m Piers, a 50k a year financial consultant, go to work in the DB9, live in a 1 mill mock Tudor in Surrey with my wife Camilla and two kids Tarquin and Tallulah, go skiing in the winter to Austria and to our villa in Tuscany every August. Saturdays & Sundays I,m Bazza, on Trucknet, I shave my head, stick on my false tattoos. put my ear rings in, put on my fatbass t shirt, rigger boots, and levis and meet my other like-minded pretend trucker mates in the pub where we shout above everybody else about random trucker talk like coming over from The Hoek, our time in" The Regiment" 
ZF gearboxes, and how we just missed The Spirit at Zeeby, interspersed with f words and violent windbreaking then it,s back home to Camilla for a candlelight supper.
Sorry bud but ask a daft question etc etc… . Where the hell did that come from I must stop mixing the brandies with John Smiths 
robroy:
Nah not many real truckers on here mate, I recently “came out” I,m a Truckvestite only at weekends, in the week I,m Piers, a 50k a year financial consultant, go to work in the DB9, live in a 1 mill mock Tudor in Surrey with my wife Camilla and two kids Tarquin and Tallulah, go skiing in the winter to Austria and to our villa in Tuscany every August. Saturdays & Sundays I,m Bazza, on Trucknet, I shave my head, stick on my false tattoos. put my ear rings in, put on my fatbass t shirt, rigger boots, and levis and meet my other like-minded pretend trucker mates in the pub where we shout above everybody else about random trucker talk like coming over from The Hoek, our time in" The Regiment"
Sorry bud but ask a daft question etc etc…
robroy:
Nah not many real truckers on here mate, I recently “came out” I,m a Truckvestite only at weekends, in the week I,m Piers, a 50k a year financial consultant, go to work in the DB9, live in a 1 mill mock Tudor in Surrey with my wife Camilla and two kids Tarquin and Tallulah, go skiing in the winter to Austria and to our villa in Tuscany every August. Saturdays & Sundays I,m Bazza, on Trucknet, I shave my head, stick on my false tattoos. put my ear rings in, put on my fatbass t shirt, rigger boots, and levis and meet my other like-minded pretend trucker mates in the pub where we shout above everybody else about random trucker talk like coming over from The Hoek, our time in" The Regiment"
Sorry bud but ask a daft question etc etc…
wow what a guy 
i can squeeze an empty coke can … does that count ?
Guess the thread starter ain’t a real trucker either if he has time to sit in the pub
Dogtanian:
The man at the bar of the truck stop asked me
Are they actually real truckers on truck net
I said I donk know, never met any of them in person
What’s a real Trucker then? A shift man or a Tramper!
Real truckers live in America, poncy lorry drivers live in Engerlund. 
robroy wrote:Nah not many real truckers on here mate, I recently “came out” I,m a Truckvestite only at weekends, in the week I,m Piers, a 50k a year financial consultant, go to work in the DB9, live in a 1 mill mock Tudor in Surrey with my wife Camilla and two kids Tarquin and Tallulah, go skiing in the winter to Austria and to our villa in Tuscany every August. Saturdays & Sundays I,m Bazza, on Trucknet, I shave my head, stick on my false tattoos. put my ear rings in, put on my fatbass t shirt, rigger boots, and levis and meet my other like-minded pretend trucker mates in the pub where we shout above everybody else about random trucker talk like coming over from The Hoek, our time in" The Regiment" ZF gearboxes, and how we just missed The Spirit at Zeeby, interspersed with f words and violent windbreaking then it,s back home to Camilla for a candlelight supper.
Sadly, as I know Piers very well, he seems to have forgotten to admit to his main claim to fame.He is a Founder --now Life-- Member of the Eddie Stobart Spotter,s Club…
Buycrider:
Hey watch it Tony, not even I would admit to THAT
All my experience comes from watching quality TV. If you study enough you learn to talk like 'em. ‘Er, yes Boss.’ ‘M1? -straight away ,Sir.’ 'Here’s a ten pound note- fill 'er up & keep the change while I have the complementary Truckers all day breakfast. ’ ,‘Can I wash your car ,boss ,when I get back to the yard next week?’
Its the same as having an HGV really.
mixing the brandies with John Smiths
[/quote]
this sounds like good advice… off to the pub then 
robroy:
Nah not many real truckers on here mate, I recently “came out” I,m a Truckvestite only at weekends, in the week I,m Piers, a 50k a year financial consultant, go to work in the DB9, live in a 1 mill mock Tudor in Surrey with my wife Camilla and two kids Tarquin and Tallulah, go skiing in the winter to Austria and to our villa in Tuscany every August. Saturdays & Sundays I,m Bazza, on Trucknet, I shave my head, stick on my false tattoos. put my ear rings in, put on my fatbass t shirt, rigger boots, and levis and meet my other like-minded pretend trucker mates in the pub where we shout above everybody else about random trucker talk like coming over from The Hoek, our time in" The Regiment"
Sorry bud but ask a daft question etc etc…
Cool, are you Lord Sock?
I can eat a whole Yorkie bar. Does that count??
pavaroti:
Real truckers live in America, poncy lorry drivers live in Engerlund.
Aye you’re right, and all the ■■■■■■■ are in Canada!
Real truckers don’t exist anymore it,s all aircon and pallets.
How many of you know what a dolly is, or a dog and chain.
My daughter plays with a dolly and when the chav across the road goes out he has a dog on a chain.
What more do i need to know
Dogtanian:
The man at the bar of the truck stop asked me
Are they actually real truckers on truck net
I said I donk know, never met any of them in person
No. I’m actually a tipper driver.
I am a retiring tipper driver so best i leave Trucknet then
mike68:
Real truckers don’t exist anymore it,s all aircon and pallets.How many of you know what a dolly is, or a dog and chain.
I know and can use all of the above and I still feel daft calling myself a ‘Trucker’.
So what if a non driver takes part in TNUK?
W
Just because some people don’t drive trucks, doesn’t mean they aren’t passionate about trucks or the haulage industry. It is nice to see that people like myself are accepted and are helped out when needed like when I needed help with my photography projects asking all sorts of daft questions which to some may have been weird but to me it helped out a lot!! But if it makes any difference I’m looking round for good deals on driving lessons and I think my dad is going to help teach me some what that will eventually lead to me driving trucks.
Oh & Ofcourse real truck drivers always wear high viz because apparently it seperates the men from the boys 
Cheers
Jonny