BIG AW:
Well last week one of our drivers was stopped for having no number plate on trl by the SAS they found him guilty as charged by the roadside they said the offence was so serious that under the new laws issued by VOSA there can only be one outcome !!
He was shot dead by the kerb his body was then taken to be displayed at traiters gate as a warning to others furthermore all his family his friends ,neighbours the pet dog (called colin ) a man he used to pass on sun morning and say "morning " when he went for a paper have all been deported to a salt mine in Russia.
When he came to work the next day the boss told him not to worry and go get another plate from the shop!
I know it to be the truth so there !!!
That can’t be right, I heard the dog was called Rex !
I’m employed on the same contract as everyone else at our place,so will require the exact same t’s and c’s.
Air con for one…air con for all.
BIG AW:
Well last week one of our drivers was stopped for having no number plate on trl by the SAS they found him guilty as charged by the roadside they said the offence was so serious that under the new laws issued by VOSA there can only be one outcome !!
He was shot dead by the kerb his body was then taken to be displayed at traiters gate as a warning to others furthermore all his family his friends ,neighbours the pet dog (called colin ) a man he used to pass on sun morning and say "morning " when he went for a paper have all been deported to a salt mine in Russia.
When he came to work the next day the boss told him not to worry and go get another plate from the shop!
I know it to be the truth so there !!!
So which way is it?
Shot dead but able to come into work next day, bloody marvellous recovery 
raymundo:
BIG AW:
Well last week one of our drivers was stopped for having no number plate on trl by the SAS they found him guilty as charged by the roadside they said the offence was so serious that under the new laws issued by VOSA there can only be one outcome !!
He was shot dead by the kerb his body was then taken to be displayed at traiters gate as a warning to others furthermore all his family his friends ,neighbours the pet dog (called colin ) a man he used to pass on sun morning and say "morning " when he went for a paper have all been deported to a salt mine in Russia.
When he came to work the next day the boss told him not to worry and go get another plate from the shop!
I know it to be the truth so there !!!
So which way is it?
Shot dead but able to come into work next day, bloody marvellous recovery
There seems to be a bit of confusion because VOSA have changed the rules to just knee capping not execution and deportation of associates for that offence.Which would explain the guvnor’s reasonable expectation of a return to work next day.But the clue that the story is bs in this case is that they would also have applied the chalk marks to ensure that the wagon wasn’t moved after being taken off the road. 
Am i the only one that puts the air con and night heater on at the same time to see which one wins.
How can that be illegal? I daresay some office dwelling doily will have some get out clause. But what if you work outside in 35 degree heat? Do the Po Po go home? Can you “legally” go home? I honestly don’t know. It would be an odd state of affairs for a lorry driver to go home because it’s 30 odd degrees when many other workers face longer hours/worse temps. Next you’ll be saying a 20 hour day is illegal (I’ve just done one- legally- across time zones). Do I agree with it? Do I ■■■■■■■■.
Yours.
Still in a very very bad mood. ■■■■ heat.
Freight Dog:
Next you’ll be saying a 20 hour day is illegal (I’ve just done one- legally- across time zones). Do I agree with it? Do I ■■■■■■■■.
I wish I had a job like yours man…[emoji57]
raymundo:
BIG AW:
Well last week one of our drivers was stopped for having no number plate on trl by the SAS they found him guilty as charged by the roadside they said the offence was so serious that under the new laws issued by VOSA there can only be one outcome !!
He was shot dead by the kerb his body was then taken to be displayed at traiters gate as a warning to others furthermore all his family his friends ,neighbours the pet dog (called colin ) a man he used to pass on sun morning and say "morning " when he went for a paper have all been deported to a salt mine in Russia.
When he came to work the next day the boss told him not to worry and go get another plate from the shop!
I know it to be the truth so there !!!
So which way is it?
Shot dead but able to come into work next day, bloody marvellous recovery
Well hes ex special needs I mean forces so he just put a plackter on it dunt like to talk about it though !!
lolipop:
Air Con, what ever happened to having both windows down and the sun roof open.
Evolution happened, I remember back in the days before seatbelts when one could work in their undercrackers and bare feet, moaning about how hot t-weather was, and boy did we moan.
Then a new generation of trucks started to appear with seatbelts compulsory, airbags and even aircon options, soon a few even had aircon as standard which lead to evolution of the species ‘trucker-erectus’.
Now truckers no longer looked like they had been dragged through a dirty hedge backwards wearing the obligatory egg stained wife beater and flat cap that had greased many a 5th wheel in its time.
Instead we had a new breed wearing smart clothes, perhaps company issue uniform and safety footware to boot. Hell some even wore gloves.
Although there is a sub-species which has also evolved known as ‘agency-notsoerectus’ that although similar in skill has a few genetic flaws such as: permanent hi viz vest on, bluetooth earpeice in lug hole that hasnt worked for years, always seen carrying a plastic bag from budget supermarket of the day and of course the obligatory limp…
Ironically this sub species is paid more than its more evolved cousin.
Anyway I digress, the real reason for aircon is that i believe its cheaper to use at speeds of 40mph + in terms of fuel economy than having windows and roof open also better for residual value of used truck. Nothing whatsoever to do with driver comfort.
However when im feeling particularly obstropolous I will have aircon and windows open at the same time, when nobodys watchin.
raymundo:
BIG AW:
Well last week one of our drivers was stopped for having no number plate on trl by the SAS they found him guilty as charged by the roadside they said the offence was so serious that under the new laws issued by VOSA there can only be one outcome !!
He was shot dead by the kerb his body was then taken to be displayed at traiters gate as a warning to others furthermore all his family his friends ,neighbours the pet dog (called colin ) a man he used to pass on sun morning and say "morning " when he went for a paper have all been deported to a salt mine in Russia.
When he came to work the next day the boss told him not to worry and go get another plate from the shop!
I know it to be the truth so there !!!
So which way is it?
Shot dead but able to come into work next day, bloody marvellous recovery
In modern transport, being shot dead is not an acceptable excuse to not turn into work. Don’t even try that one Dozy.
However when im feeling particularly obstropolous I will have aircon and windows open at the same time, when nobodys watchin.
I do this too…such a rebel 
Santa:
I firmly believe that I started the thing about pretty blue lights in the cab signalling that the driver is gay.
It is true that the installation of blue lights on heavy lorries was having a detrimental effect on the owl population. Owls became disorientated by the blue lights and lorry/owl collisions sky-rocketed with owls coming-off second-best in every encounter.
ChrisArbon:
It is true that the installation of blue lights on heavy lorries was having a detrimental effect on the owl population. Owls became disorientated by the blue lights and lorry/owl collisions sky-rocketed with owls coming-off second-best in every encounter.
Yes this is FACT!
It was the “Peruvian Pygmy Owl” that was the most affected, the facts are on google.
Yes, my mate is a Bird enthusiast, and he reliably informs me that that is indeed a “Peruvian Pygmy Owl”.
Just Google: " Night owls should avoid blue lights in the evening."
There was an old tale that when Chris Hayters bought (secondhand) lorries, if they had air con it was removed to save money. Now they buy old lorries and pimp some of them up.
BillyHunt:
Santa:
I firmly believe that I started the thing about pretty blue lights in the cab signalling that the driver is gay.
Well that explains why I’ve been getting more attention lately. 
no thats the pelmets and tassaly curtons 
Dipper_Dave:
Am i the only one that puts the air con and night heater on at the same time to see which one wins.
ffs dipper just spat out me gin @tonick
