Heard at the gate!

UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUMS THE UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUM (INTERACTIVE)
1

Had the good fortune to do a delivery to a frozen food factory in Boston the other night(funy that seeing as I pull a fridge :laughing: ). Anyway, get out of the cab, press the intercom button, and says"Blah blah, got a delivery for you". Other end say’s “What have you come to collect?”. “No, I have a DELIVERY for you”. “Oh, are you sure it’s for us?” “Yes, it has your address on the notes”.Now the next bit I could not believe, “Does your gaffer know?” :open_mouth: . At this point I felt like saying, No, just brought this load off my own back for the fun of it, but thought better of it. And they wonder why we get a tad annoyed at times :unamused:

2

You could,nt make up could you.Unreal.

3

:laughing: :laughing: comedy of my fave type, thanks!

Mal.

4

Which factory was it? Only askin as i live about 10 miles away and the only one that springs to mind is George Adams?

5

One of our customers used to have a security guard that would ask
“loaded or empty ?”
“empty” was my reply as I was going in to load up
Next question was
“collecting or delivering”
“delivering” says I just for the hell of it
10 second pause now while he reads what he’s just written
“errr”
“exactly, now open the ruddy gate !!”
:unamused:

6

It was Padleys Shaggy

7

Tomcat:
One of our customers used to have a security guard that would ask
“loaded or empty ?”
“empty” was my reply as I was going in to load up
Next question was
“collecting or delivering”
“delivering” says I just for the hell of it
10 second pause now while he reads what he’s just written
“errr”
“exactly, now open the ruddy gate !!”
:unamused:

lol I suppose the second question makes sense if you’re only part-loaded and might be coming to load up some more.

8

I remember when I drove for Fed Ex and my truck had ‘MATCHBOX’ in huge letters the whole legnth of the trailer and on the cab doors. I would pull up at Tesco or Argos and the security man would ask the enevitable question … “What are you delivering?”

9

My Dad’s company go in there. It’s Hargrave International. Do you ever see them?

10

Shaggy:
My Dad’s company go in there. It’s Hargrave International. Do you ever see them?

Have I heard of Hargreves ? Yes, after leaving Fed Ex (redundant) Tesco took me on and i saw them all the time.

11

Hi Pat. I was actually speaking to anoraknaphobia but its nice to see others replying too. They’re the ones with the big HI in blue and the snowflakes.

12

Yep, they are the best ones aren’t they Pat. They look at the truck, read the company name which is in 4ft high letter and then ask
“What company is it?”
Geez

13

Ok. The question I get most asked is: “What is it?” I’m a courier. I deliever lots of pallets to lots of different places. How the hell do I know? So I tend to use these three replys:

If I’m feeling particularly vindictive “glider engines.” (You’d be suprised how many times your told to put it on bay so and so after they’ve shouted it over the radio. :smiley: "

If it’s a cold day:“Brass monkeys.” See above :smiley: .

Or if I’m feeling particularly co - operative I shove the paperwork in their tiny little mits and say “you know know as much as me :unamused: .” Then I normally get “well, that doesn’t tell me anything. What is it?” Like I’m psychic or something!!!

All said with a smile on my face and a polite thankyou for services rendered.

Makes my day go with a swing anyways.

14

Big one i deal with couriers every day getting 3p worth of screws for Bob the builder who is desperate for them YESTERDAY i just wondered if its a stupid question to ask who its from as thats usually my first question?.

15

I don’t think I said it was a stupid question Jammy - as it stands it’s probabley quite relevant to yourself, but, as I said, how the hell do I know when I’ve got 16/17 different drops? Got one bloke this morning being quite petulant when I handed him the paperwork told him politley (yes really) to have a look as I don’t know and he’d probably decipher the paperwork quicker than me anyway. That annoys me more than anything and no normally I wouldn’t have a clue so don’t shoot the messanger. If people are ok with it then fine I’ll try and help you out. I don’t let 'em walk all over me, but I do it politley and with a smile on my face. Don’t ask me who it’s from 'cause I don’t know. I’m not psychic and I’m not a computer. Just have a look at my paperwork . Rant over. Sorry.:smiley: (Not aimed at you personally BTW, just anyone who’s ever petulantly asked me what is it and where’s it come from and then moaned 'cause I’ve told 'em it’s tiles - which is what it was).

16

Ask him if you should take a crowbar to it and open it there and then. That usually shuts them up.

Or you could ask him if the postman opens all your letters so he can tell you what they are should you ask?

17

We get this one quite a lot, as I’m sure all you other box bods do…they don’t seem to realise that we are simply contracted to deliver a sealed container…it could be completely the wrong stuff for all we care, so long as the seal’s on there, we get paid!

The one that always tickles me is when they ask “What sort of container…?” (Well, I suppose it might just be that big metal thing on the back of the wagon…)…closely followed by "Do you need a hand lifting it…?..(Nah, mate, I’m plated for 30 tonnes!)… :unamused: :open_mouth: :laughing: :laughing:

18

On a more serious side (sorry) if we all new what we were carrying,couriers included, a lot of drivers wouldn’t be where they are now

I went to one pick up and was refused because I did not have the packaging.
The manager explained he had told the company what he needed to return the consignment and phoned his customer said what he thought-----the plastic container was leaking a chemical that penetrated human skin

I still got paid (as an o/d)

19

As of Thursday, I tell 'em ■■■■■ (sorry about that but it is relevant) and let 'em work it out :smiley: :open_mouth: :unamused: . Tends to cover all eventualitys does that. We do get some stuff through that’s Hazfreight so I make a point of getting the manual out now and looking at it. My boss has obviousley got used to it 'cause it’s usually on the desk open at the relevant point now :stuck_out_tongue: .

20

delivered into matalan at skem the other day gaurd ask what are you delivering
me i dunno
gaurd witch supplier
me seaforth docks
gaurd its not listed
me how should i know its you 1200pm container
gaurd oh right why didnt you say

me dohdoh doh :laughing: :laughing: :laughing: