although I am not married I have spoken to loads of drivers over the years and its swings and roundabouts,some have told me it puts a strain on their marriage not being home until the end of the week,especially when kids don’t see their dad until the weekends,others have said their wives cannot wait to see the back of them,what kind of marriage is that,i have met quite a few over the years who have divorced because of nights out,mainly because the wife somehow finds out the hubby has a bit on the side or vice versa,if you are married and have worked hard to build up what you have,nights out are not worth the hassle unless you have a very strong marriage or very understanding wife
robroy:
truckman020:
Contraflow:
the maoster:
I would imagine that nights out can certainly be [zb]. It all depends on how you take your nights out tbh. We have guys where I work who’ll tell me that nights out are crap and when I ask them where they parked they will say “oh in a layby on the A blah blah blah, or in such and such services” and I say “yeah, they’re crap when you’re an idiot and park in them places”.The secret is to not run until 9 hours 50 minutes and then look for somewhere to park, find somewhere earlier, park up, go for a walk, find a nice pub, have a meal and a couple of pints and actually talk to strangers! Yeah, scary thought innit? Seriously, nights out are what you make them, if you lack imagination or the bottle to go off the beaten track then they will be dismal and dreary affairs. You get out what you put in.
I’d rather just go home after my days work thanks. You know, like a normal person.
There’s two types of lorry drivers; those who treat it as a job, which is what it is… and those who treat it as a life, which it certainly isn’t.
+1
The job/life comment probably makes for a good sound bite, but think about it It’ s like comparing apples with pears, similar but completely different.
. If you are a day man, night man, trunker etc yeh it’s a job.
If you are a Euro tramper away for weeks rather than days, or even just UK where you are away all week home wk.ends, well like it or not it is your life, whether you lot agree with that or condone it does not matter a [zb], it’s how it is.
One of the reasons why trampers get ■■■■■ about drivers messing up their allocated motor,…it’s their home.
You 100mile radius men have trouble empathising with that view, or understanding.
I agree. My truck is my home for the week even if I don’t always get to night out. It annoys me no end when I get back to find its been messed about with. Trampers are a different breed compared to job men. Trampers live the job whilst others just do the job.
truckman020:
although I am not married I have spoken to loads of drivers over the years and its swings and roundabouts,some have told me it puts a strain on their marriage not being home until the end of the week,especially when kids don’t see their dad until the weekends,others have said their wives cannot wait to see the back of them,what kind of marriage is that,i have met quite a few over the years who have divorced because of nights out,mainly because the wife somehow finds out the hubby has a bit on the side or vice versa,if you are married and have worked hard to build up what you have,nights out are not worth the hassle unless you have a very strong marriage or very understanding wife
Well I’ve got both mate. My Mrs who has been an excellent wife to me, has been with me since I started driving/tramping in 1979, so she basically knows nothing else.
I admit I regret missing a lot of my 4 kids growing up, but they are all good kids, none of them have caused us any major problems in the times I have been away. All have good jobs and we all get on really well as a family, so we must have done something right.
You are correct that trampers have a high divorce rate, but on the other hand, me and 4 of my old school mates went on a 50th birthday/lads weekend ■■■■ up to Prague. The only two of us that still had the same wife since the 80s were me and my mate…both 30 yr trampers. 
Radar19:
Trampers live the job whilst others just do the job.
Work to live, don’t live to work.
Tramping is a sad existence.
truckman020:
although I am not married I have spoken to loads of drivers over the years and its swings and roundabouts,some have told me it puts a strain on their marriage not being home until the end of the week,especially when kids don’t see their dad until the weekends,others have said their wives cannot wait to see the back of them,what kind of marriage is that,i have met quite a few over the years who have divorced because of nights out,mainly because the wife somehow finds out the hubby has a bit on the side or vice versa,if you are married and have worked hard to build up what you have,nights out are not worth the hassle unless you have a very strong marriage or very understanding wife
I think it swings in roundabouts.
I tramp away mon to fri.
My wife works mon to fri as well so we both off at weekends.
If we both changed jobs we would take a massive pay cut and more than likely work shifts and weekends. I think we would probably have less quality time together.
If you’ve been tramping 30 years & all your Mrs has ever known is you being away all week, then it’s a different kettle of fish to starting it mid-relationship and going from having a normal routine & lifestyle where your home everynight, to suddenly only being in the bed twice a week.
I wouldn’t ever entertain the idea of going tramping now as i’m pretty sure it’d almost certainly ■■■■ things up, the Mrs is too used to us being at home & we enjoy each others company. The ships sailed, something to start early on if your keen I think.
Contraflow:
Radar19:
Trampers live the job whilst others just do the job.Work to live, don’t live to work.
Again a good point, but tramping is a lifestyle job by it’s nature.
Whether given the chance I would do the same again knowing what I know now is debatable. After saying that doing days, the same run every day, would bore the arse off me after a week.
robroy:
would bore the arse off me after a week.
What about us? 
You’ve been on here years… 
Should I ‘■■■■■■■■’ leave now? 
rob22888:
If you’ve been tramping 30 years & all your Mrs has ever known is you being away all week, then it’s a different kettle of fish to starting it mid-relationship and going from having a normal routine & lifestyle where your home everynight, to suddenly only being in the bed twice a week.I wouldn’t ever entertain the idea of going tramping now as i’m pretty sure it’d almost certainly [zb] things up, the Mrs is too used to us being at home & we enjoy each others company. The ships sailed, something to start early on if your keen I think.
I know what you mean mate.
I’ve been with my misses just short 10 years.
But I was in the army the whole time we were together and started tramping not long after I left.
It’s normal for us now for me to be away all time.
V40LLY:
Tramping is a sad existence.
Thanks for that invaluable contribution to the debate mate, and well done.
Evil8Beezle:
robroy:
would bore the arse off me after a week.What about us?
You’ve been on here years…Should I ‘■■■■■■■■’ leave now?
Oooh I’m hurt, and I thought you loved me.
You never write, you never call, and now this.
What am I supposed to do. 
robroy:
Evil8Beezle:
robroy:
would bore the arse off me after a week.What about us?
You’ve been on here years…Should I ‘■■■■■■■■’ leave now?
Oooh I’m hurt, and I thought you loved me.
You never write, you never call, and now this.
What am I supposed to do.
Well you could go and watch a soon to be championship footy match!
robroy:
truckman020:
although I am not married I have spoken to loads of drivers over the years and its swings and roundabouts,some have told me it puts a strain on their marriage not being home until the end of the week,especially when kids don’t see their dad until the weekends,others have said their wives cannot wait to see the back of them,what kind of marriage is that,i have met quite a few over the years who have divorced because of nights out,mainly because the wife somehow finds out the hubby has a bit on the side or vice versa,if you are married and have worked hard to build up what you have,nights out are not worth the hassle unless you have a very strong marriage or very understanding wifeWell I’ve got both mate. My Mrs who has been an excellent wife to me, has been with me since I started driving/tramping in 1979, so she basically knows nothing else.
I admit I regret missing a lot of my 4 kids growing up, but they are all good kids, none of them have caused us any major problems in the times I have been away. All have good jobs and we all get on really well as a family, so we must have done something right.
You are correct that trampers have a high divorce rate, but on the other hand, me and 4 of my old school mates went on a 50th birthday/lads weekend ■■■■ up to Prague. The only two of us that still had the same wife since the 80s were me and my mate…both 30 yr trampers.
that’s nice to know,if I was married that’s the kind of marriage I would like
Evil8Beezle:
robroy:
Evil8Beezle:
robroy:
would bore the arse off me after a week.What about us?
You’ve been on here years…Should I ‘■■■■■■■■’ leave now?
Oooh I’m hurt, and I thought you loved me.
You never write, you never call, and now this.
What am I supposed to do.Well you could go and watch a soon to be championship footy match!
You know how to wound me don’t you, how could you.
Now you are insulting my team, how dare you, Newcastle will not be in the Championship next season.
And btw I know your mother only PRETENDED to like me.
All your clothes are on the way to the Charity shop, see how you like that.!!!
robroy:
You know how to wound me don’t you, how could you.
Now you are insulting my team, how dare you, Newcastle will not be in the Championship next season.
And btw I know your mother only PRETENDED to like me.All your clothes are on the way to the Charity shop, see how you like that.!!!
Love cuts like a knife sweetie!
And I don’t blame you for taking them to the charity shop, that’s where you got them from ya tight git! 
Contraflow:
Radar19:
Trampers live the job whilst others just do the job.Work to live, don’t live to work.
Can I not enjoy my job?
I’m away 1-2 weeks at a shot and stay in hotels. It’s crap for a lifestyle by normal judgement of lifestyle. Couldn’t imagine tramping in a lorry again though, I think that would be a step too far for me. I say it’s crap staying away. Sometimes its the best thing since sliced bread, sometimes its really low. You get to do and see some very cool stuff, have adventures. But you can’t shake the overriding sense that you’re missing out on life as what is considered “normal”. Perhaps it’s only normal because it’s a lifestyle the majority are forced to live and never see the alternatives. Who knows. I think having a partner amplifies it as you’re away from them and it causes strain occasionally. Either way, it haunts you like a spectre.
I come back have maybe 4 days off or 6 days and try to catch up. On paper, we have 14 days off in 28 when vacation is included. Doesn’t seem to work to that pattern though. Typically maybe away 9 days, off 4, away 8 then off 7. Sometimes away 14 then off 4-7. It varies. Any road, I’m off and I run around like a fly trying to see my mates. As they’ve got kids it’s like their feet have been screwed to the laminate so always involves schlepping to theirs. They’ve been doing the weekly shop, mowing the grass. Screaming kids, winging wife. The same old routine week in week out. Is this what I’m missing out on I ask myself? Is this what youre beating yourself up about? And I think “no”. They’re happy they seem.
For the first week I feel envious. Friday they’re planning a day out at National Trust castle with the kids or something and on Fri night I’m staring dull eyed at “the caravan” - the suitcase yet again trying to pack enough pants, socks, adaptors for a trip. After a month off on vacation at home, the novelty and envy has worn off. That life isnt for me. I’ve lived it before and got very very bored. I’m just not cut from that cloth any more they are from mine. I get itchy feet and want the adventure again. Maybe Im just maladjusted and have been buggered by the job, cant trust myself to stand on my own feet and allow myself to define who I am away from the job. I want the high that it gives then want more, yet hate it a lot of the time. It’s a complicated relationship. All long haul freight blokes the same I think.
I know I don’t want this life forever. I also know I’m not the type that wants a plodding mundane type of 9-5 life. However I know that figuratively running away to sea will come of age and won’t be great when I’m in my sixties. It puts it hook in you though.
With the job I’m in I’ll never have the 9-5 mon to fri existence even on work that gets you home everyday. The big leap for me will come to settling back down to life back at home and live with a comparatively routine type of job and look forward to the extra time to go mountain biking, projects etc and accept I’ll go to work and forever yearn to head out over the ocean and have adventures again, but just accept I’ve done it once and had to grow up and face my skeletons. I do wonder if I’ll ever grow up.
Just been to the optician for the vision part of the medical, all set to renewal my licence, tacho card already done so all set for the next 5 years. Hopefully for the last time.
Radar19:
Contraflow:
Radar19:
Trampers live the job whilst others just do the job.Work to live, don’t live to work.
Can I not enjoy my job?
Of course you can. I enjoy my job.