animal:
Guy Martin new book " When your dead your dead "When I split with my kids dad we made are own arrangements as we were Adults the kids did not ask to be born the kids did not as us to split the kids did not ask they did get my time I did change my job & hours to suit yes I did claim working tax & child tax credits he payed my not a lot we sorted that out less then £5k in solicitor fees n total
The kids are not what I cal 'porns" not to be played with hope these people realise what they are doing to there kids as well it will not end good keep all your paper work form solicitors & when said kids reach an age or on your death they can then read how hard you tried
You can only do you best with what you have & do what you think is right at the time for you
Kids don’t need a lot what they do need is a pedants / grandparents love more than anything else
Deep breath taken little one collected and happy
1 of the best thing I bought my kids when really young were torches cost more for the batteries then the torch when they get to there teens they don’t want you around as much then you can go out & earn more money change jobs give them different things
Stop take a check settle down deep breath move on
■■■■■■■:
Been there too, mate. I fought and fought for over two years over fair access to my (then) little girl, only to be let down time and time again by my useless solicitor and feeble courts. I tried absolutely everything i could until it pushed me to the very edge of a serious emotional meltdown. Like you, i covered hundreds of miles on a regular basis, only to be [zb] around by the monster that had previously been my loving partner. Also like you, many thousands of pounds later, i had achieved absolutely nothing, and for the sake of my sanity, i took the extremely painful decision to set about rebuilding my shattered personal life without my lovely little daughter. I could write pages listing the nasty, lying, plain disgraceful things she did and said to block me out, but it`d be all-too-familiar to you by the sound of it. Sadly there are some things that happen in life that you are utterly unable to influence or change.The pain of it has now healed, but i could never find it in my heart to forgive her for how she so spitefully caused me such intense stress and anguish. I wish you all the very best
Feeling for you mate this is so common these days despite Human Rights, Equality, Childrens Act 1989 etc etc … these work in your favour,unless you have a ■■■■■ 
Dipper_Dave:
Can you move closer to your daughter.
If I move closer I still have the travelling back so little one can see her Paternal family who she loves seeing, and I would be stuck living somewhere with no support and where the wages are appalling and the house prices sky high…
boredwivdrivin:
You have my sympathy2 things important : your kid and your health
A word of caution , when i ran my own business it all got out of hand working 18/20 hours everyday .
This went on for several years and i was ‘fine’ i thought but in reality i couldnt see wood from the trees .
Then 1 day wallop . id caught a ‘virus’ that was called viral vertigo . ( not caused by tiredness in itself but fatigue had left me low and open to it )
This knocked me out for 3 or 4 months when i couldnt balance or drive or read or anything .
I lost everything during this time and it was all self inflicted by over work
If i get tired now it comes back , can never get rid of it only have good weeks/months
My youngest family still loved me and didnt love me any less when i was skint . we learnt to spend time doing cheap things like cycling camping and hill walking .
When they get to secondary school yr relationship will change as they have new priorities
Point is i think u probs too tired to see woods from trees .
Change your job and focus on your health and kids …
You can never get either back once you have lost them
Wise words there 
I shall try and heed them
That vertigo stuff sound like how I am feeling
The joke of it is I had my own business where most of my work was delivering to the area my ex moved to - but I packed it in so I could spend more time with the little one 
robroy:
carryfast-yeti:
kids come first of course.if you can,try and improve your relationship with your ex.,and you may be able to sort out access to your child which suits all of you.forget any bitterness about who done what,or why things went wrong.they did,obviously,so just accept it and move on.i’ve been there twice,and it’s not nice,and it’s cost me a fortune…but that’s life!My mate had a similar situation to o/p
He decided to try and develop some sort of truce with her. It was difficult as it was him that [zb] off with a younger bird.
He basically bit the bullet and offered to help her any way he could, he showed her his pay slips, was straight with her and even she realised he was doing his best to help her and his kid.
It did take time, but he got to see his boy.
In fact the young bird walked, and it took 18 months and they got back together. Not saying that will happen to you, but you could start by talking to her.In my case I missed a lot of the growing up of my 4 kids, but at least me and the Mrs stayed together and she brought them all up well. Holidays were the best they came with me all over Western Europe, not all 4 at once
On reflection, I would maybe have done a lot of things differently. Trying to balance tramping with family life is not easy.
One thing I know is I don’t want her back 
my little one loves being in the truck with me “wow It’s got curtains and beds Dad” 
but most of the work I do ends up in RDC’s and you know the 'elf and safety they employ and she’s a little young to be left alone in the cab yet, a few years yet
bigvern1:
I missed my kids growing up due to driving and working away for weeks on end. I split up with their Mother and moved away. I even lost precious time with my Son, as some of you know lost his battle with cancer. So now I’m home every night with the present Mrs BV1. Not used to it yet, but have succumbed to being with loved ones rather than sleeping on some crappy ind est for no night out money.
Sad for you mate just shows life is too short to let work in the way …
Thank you for all your advice and kind replies.
I got a text waking me at 0710am today telling me if I wanted to have her at 1000am that was my only option, so I hit the motorway at 90mph all the way and made it. A very happy little one is where she belongs and has seen the Grandmother and extended family she adores and has not seen for 3 months, and her Dad might be tired from another 6 hour round trip but he is happy, for a week at least
I really think it is time that this Government and Transport firms start respecting Paternal family rights and stop treating us as second class citizens and get into the 21st century, but then I’m sure I saw a flying pig off the M5 earlier or maybe it’s my exhaustion turning into hallucinations
I cood give ya all my Phone Numbers and you woodnt be able to wake me 
But i wood come back when awake if you send me a txt 
Do you want to be jobless and homeless? How would that help your child?
Kids are very understanding, but, they want visits, and they want them at set periods, it doesnt matter if you have presents or not, but they need to see their parents. I sympathise with your predicament, and my heart goes out to you, in what you are trying to achieve. One option would be a 4 on 4 off system or the other way is to work mon - fri and have her for every weekend, that works with a mate of mine. In the past i have always chased money and excitement of the job, international trips, as far as i can get, sadly it left me with 2 failed marriages, and kids i never saw growing up, thats called being selfish. They never went without, which i saw as being ok, but it wasnt, never seeing them in the school play, or pantomime, celebrating birthdays, exam results etc…so i admire anyone who has to work very hard in order to see their children… i love my kids and see them quite regularly, and they all tell me they love me, and forgive me for not being there when i should have been.
truckyboy:
Kids are very understanding, but, they want visits, and they want them at set periods, it doesnt matter if you have presents or not, but they need to see their parents. I sympathise with your predicament, and my heart goes out to you, in what you are trying to achieve. One option would be a 4 on 4 off system or the other way is to work mon - fri and have her for every weekend, that works with a mate of mine. In the past i have always chased money and excitement of the job, international trips, as far as i can get, sadly it left me with 2 failed marriages, and kids i never saw growing up, thats called being selfish. They never went without, which i saw as being ok, but it wasnt, never seeing them in the school play, or pantomime, celebrating birthdays, exam results etc…so i admire anyone who has to work very hard in order to see their children… i love my kids and see them quite regularly, and they all tell me they love me, and forgive me for not being there when i should have been.
Cheers Truckyboy that was very honest of you about your own experiences, at least your cool with your kids now, but I sympathise for the missed moments. I would love to know the divorce rate amongst drivers, I am forever talking to guys who have been tramping away for twenty odd years missing out on the kids growing up and looking forward to retiring and finding the missus and they have nothing in common once the kids have gone, then having to work their arse off past retirement age to buy another house etc. Still my little one is at my feet making dog ■■■ from her playdoh and I could be doing a shift
Remember quality time with her not quantity don’t matter how long / length of time you have her for it is the quality of that time spent with her
Reading the above posts makes me realise that getting home every night to a wife and two small kids who enjoy me coming through the front door is more living the dream than a sleeper cab covered in stupid lights.
I just packed in a five days over seven midnight start job because I never got to spend any time with my family. I haven’t looked back.