Although I find ■■■■■■■■ particularly distressing, on the other hand, if you can step back a little it’s as good as watching Monty Python.
What a ■■■■■■■ larf:
Now, we have discovered that British HGV Drivers are limited to 90 days a year in Europe due to our esteemed leaders citing the end of ‘Freedom Of Movement’ as one of the major successes of ■■■■■■■■. - - - -You couldn’t make it up, not even if you were Nigel Fartage.
You can just see the pre-trip briefing in the Traffic Office, "Here’s all your paperwork Drive, let’s just check how many days you’ve got left on your passport - Oh ■■■■, you’ve got enough time to get to Munich but not to get home even if we fly someone out to changeover."
Shouts to his mate "Is Stanislovski around?, we need him or another EE to do Joe’s run as he is out of ‘Months’ "
Or worse, Joe sets off without checks and is looking to park up around Munich, he’s a few minutes over his driving hours when he gets pulled by Herr Old Stumpenfuhrer Bill, " Hallo Inglishman, can I see your Tacho?? Oh I see you are a few minutes over your time, are you looking for somewhere to park up?" - "Yes Herr Old Stumpenfuhrer Bill, can you help me find somewhere" says Joe.
“Of course follow me I’ll show you somewhere nice & quiet away from all those smelly EE drivers, but before we go let me see your passport please” - - - “Hang on” said Joe “its in the cage with all the paperwork” eventually Joe extracts his passport from underneath a pile of groupage paperwork and hands it to Herr Old Stumpenfuhrer Bill, who studies it carefully and declares “Inglishman, I was intending to turn a blind eye to you exceeding your hours but ■■■■ me - not only have you exceeded your hours but you’ve exceeded your ■■■■■■■ months as well. Now follow me to our secure parking area”
So Joe, thinking all is probably OK and the office can sort out any problems, sets off following Herr Old Stumpenfuhrer Bill, after half an hour - which got Joe wondering - there was a sign which said ‘Stalag HGV Colditz’ and at which they turned left into the courtyard of a Castle that looked straight out of a WW2 Film set.
Not so bad after all, he thought when he saw all the British wagons parked up, and to make the drivers feel at home the Guards wore British RDC Uniforms, so when they demanded his keys and showed him to the ‘Waiting room’ he felt at home and not suspicious. Looking up he saw faces peering out and then the nostalgic words of the Brexit Theme Song to the tune of Colonel Bogey caught his ear.
Eventually he was shown to his room on the 5th floor and being absolutely shagged by not only being over his hours, but also 6 weeks over his months, he fell fast asleep on the horsehair mattress, only to be awakend a few hrs later for breakfast and free association.
At breakfast, the main topic of conversation was: if only they had gone France/Italy they could have used traditional trade items to overcome their problems. Fortunately, there was a posse of Stobart’s Drivers there who reminded the others that whilst they weren’t very good at going under bridges they had luckily spent time with Stobart Air and with any luck could fly everyone out from the top floor.
Feel Free to continue the story:-
There’s a Youtube Video about it that is also worth a view https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0htuvskoMFo