Thanks again guys.
Wiretwister - Thanks for taking the time to write all that I’ve read through it (twice) and Have taken on board the advice given,it’s all very “new” to us both because although we both know/knew people that went through it,as an outsider you never really experience it all when your looking in from the outside.
The hospital called today we have got to go down on the 29th Dec for pre op tests,before then we will chat to our son and explain everything,although he is just 8 years old he picks up on things and dwells on them,he has picked up that his mummy isn’t well because the tablets she is taking for the pain are making her very drowsy and also little things that he says catch my wife off guard at times and it upsets her so maybe Boxing Day or the day after we will be having a conversation with him I never imagined we would be,well not while he was so young anyway!
But once he knows then he,if he wants to,can come to the hospital in the 29th so he feels involved because I don’t want him to feel isolated from his mummy which would make him worry more.
It’s difficult to know whether what we are doing the best for Liam or not but it feels right that he should not be left in the dark as very soon mummy will be in intensive care for a few days so he won’t be able to see her so we’d rather he knew and saw where she will be if only to put his mind at rest.
Thanks again for all the advice,kind words.
thats terrible , how sad , it just makes you think , you really dont know whats round the corner in life ,
i guess most of us have had a lovely Christmas day in the house with our wifes and kids
but you just dont know what the future holds , tragic circumstances could occur at any time ,
all we can do now is pray and spare a thought for Chris’s wife , Chris himself and young Liam
savour and rejoice those happy times we are currently having , count yourself lucky , who knows what the future has in store for any of us
Thanks everyone,not sure why I put the 4th Jan as the date she has to go into hospital it’s actually the 6th (tommorow).
We have to ring up at 3pm to check there is a bed which we are told is standard procedure in case they have had a major incident that’s seen a influx of patients ect.
Then we will drive down to Birmingham to drop Angela off for her to stay overnight on the ward to be “first in” on the 7th for her operation,I can see that dropping her off will be tough as our son will be coming too and he has become very clingy to the wife in the last few days which is understandable I guess.
Then on Thursday I’ll drop my son off at school then make my way down to Birmingham to wait for some news from the operation which is 5-7hrs long as long as it goes as planned.
The wife is on the mend now,been a worrying few days because they couldn’t get her blood levels right and her liver function tests weren’t great,she ended up in intensive care for 4 days rather than the normal 1-2 days.
She is better now though and is leaving intensive care in the morning hopefully be ready to leave hospital on Fri/Sat then just gotta wait for the results to find out exactly what the tumour was and whether it’s spread.
I know what you’re going through, I’m off at the mo looking after her indoors, she’s just had her fourth op, tumour removed from her breast, one from her left lung and now two from her right lung! We do our best to keep going through this, really can’t praise the NHS staff enough they have really looked after us.
We have kids that are grown up, just before this all started we began fostering, so now have a 12 year old boy who’s having to come to terms with this, after being taken from his own family it’s not easy for him!
Although we’ve obviously had to have deep and meaningful conversations about the possible outcome of all this, the one time we both completely lost the plot was when we found out our dog has a tumour in his hip, it’s inoperable, he’s on steroids and seems happy enough at the mo, but it’s only a matter of time for him, it can be hard, you need someone to unload to who is outside of everything, i know i have!
We all see the ads for cancer charities, but until you’re involved you can’t possibly know how much of a roller coaster it is!
xichrisxi:
I’ve always moaned about not having a decent time off over Xmas,normally just end up with a couple/3 days if I’m lucky depending on how my rota falls.
I have been to docs this morning to get signed off work for the forseeable as my wife had pains in her side a cpl of months ago,she was referred to the hospital and after scans/tests and visits to Birmingham liver hospital yesterday we have been told they are 95% sure she has liver or bile duct cancer and they will operate on the 4th Jan to removed a large tumour (2.5kg approx) from her liver and then be allowed time for her body to recover from this operation before starting chemotherapy,we have also been told by the surgeon yesterday that there is a 10% chance she won’t survive the op,the first date for the op offered was Xmas but we have a 8 year old son and after the op my wife will spend 3 days in intensive care so my son wouldn’t of been able to see her on Xmas day which we decided was not the best for neither him or my wife.
As said I used to moan about not having time off at Xmas,right now I’d happily work 24 hrs on Xmas day in exchange for what’s ahead of us,after Xmas day we are going to sit out son down and tell him what’s going on as he knows so far that mummy has been to the hospital a lot of times lately but he isn’t aware of the real reason,my wife is 36.
Enjoy whatever time you have with loved ones over Xmas guys,having a few weeks off ain’t all that it’s cracked upto be.
Oh boy, are you ever right in being careful what you wish for. I really feel for you and your family, and pray God that she pulls through.
Take care.
Well these hospitals really ain’t big on good news!
Went back last Thursday to speak with a consultant with regards to the findings from the op,unfortuneltly they have confirmed our worst fear that it is cancer,it’s spread locally they told us but not what they call distant.
So,for now as she is still under treatment for the op to remove her tumour they can’t do anything until she gets discharged from the liver units care which we are hoping will be tommorow when we go back down to see the specialist,there’s still a couple of things that ain’t completely as they should be nothing major but they have to be right before they will discharge her.
After that happens we will be referred back to North Staffs to an Oncologist (cancer specialist) for his to look at things and decide if and what treatment to pursue,they have diagnosed it as Bile duct cancer which is very rare less that 1000 new cases per year which in itself beings its own problems as due to the small number of cases there is no automatic treatment plan to follow and has to be decided case by case.
The tumour they removed was 17cms at its widest point so quite a size,but they are hopeful they have removed all of it but they obviously cannot guarantee that,future tests and scans will show more.
