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stay very positive, 
PLEASE donāt hit the bottle! 
I hope you make it pal 
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dont worry I wont be hitting the bottle.
I have thought about it but realised it wont get me anywhere if im ā ā ā ā ā ā ā
got the wife and kids to get back and drinking means im off the road and not getting paid.
well things have progressed along a little in the wrong direction since my last post.
ive now moved into a flat to give her space and its all turned sour.
she wants me to die, she wants all my wages, and sheās now banned me from seeing the kids.
its all gone wrong.
i reckon you should let her go,and accept the marriage is over.
try and work things out amicablyā¦for the sake of the kids.the last thing you want is to give her the hump and start making it difficult for you to access your children.
commonrail:
i reckon you should let her go,and accept the marriage is over.
try and work things out amicablyā¦for the sake of the kids.the last thing you want is to give her the hump and start making it difficult for you to access your children.
I have moved on to a certain degree but shes already playing the āyou cant see the kids unless you pay me cardā
everything was amicable until her mother stuck her oar in and now the wife is making out sheās god and that if she says jump then I must ask how high.
well she can go and uc herself.
In my opinion. Say nothing to her at all now. Itās too soon after the break to try and be reasonable. Stay calm, do nothing silly and chill. I had this with my kidsā Mother. The emotional blackmail, the name calling,the rows. Just do your thing. Send money that you can afford to the kids and give it a while. Your kids will ALWAYS love you. Get on with things and itāll sort itself out. Trust me.
Ade.
I feel for you mate, going through it myself. wait till the hell that is known as the CSA turn upā¦they will take your money whether you can afford it or not.
My wife left me last May and it is only now that Iām looking to get my life back together, but here is the rub. Cos I was so ā ā ā ā ā ā up over the events I now have a problem with references when looking for a new job. I was driving buses at the time (so I could be home more often) and the split caused issues so I left there.(not on good terms either) Moved to Lancashire for a job that fell through (No work in Cornwall) and just about scraped a living on agencies till Christmas. That dried up and Iām now on the dole trying to get a job but hitting a brick wall when it gets to work history and references. Not helped by the fact that Iāve a big gap due to a firm going bust whilst I was there.
Would love to get back on tippers or containers. (the 2 jobs I had that I loved the most)
lizard:
commonrail:
i reckon you should let her go,and accept the marriage is over.
try and work things out amicablyā¦for the sake of the kids.the last thing you want is to give her the hump and start making it difficult for you to access your children.I have moved on to a certain degree but shes already playing the āyou cant see the kids unless you pay me cardā
everything was amicable until her mother stuck her oar in and now the wife is making out sheās god and that if she says jump then I must ask how high.
well she can go and uc herself.
well good luck with everything.
Im 24yrs old. Iāve been with my girlfriend for just over 4 years.
I leave home usually on a Sunday evening and return on the Friday or Saturday. Im fully aware that my job affects her life somewhat and i can understand why. Weāve talked about the situation and she understands that at this point in time, this is all i can do to save for our deposit for a house. I have a few jobs in the pipeline which. if they come off, will give me a proper social life again as its not a driving job.
I enjoy the varierty of work and different locations as on powder tanks, but my social life is non exsitant. When im stuck in a ā ā ā ā -soaked layby on a Friday night and my mates have called to see if ill be coming out to town that night, it gets a bit dis-hartning. But im thankfull im in a job as there are plenty of people struggling for work.
Iāve always worked away from home and it suits. I just dont see the point in going to work Monday morning and back home Monday night when its a lot less hassle to be away all the week (or longer), not to mention less expenditure on fuel travelling to/from work. Doesnāt suit everyone but Iāve been with my wife 35 years and we still managed a happy marriage. I did try night trunking for a while but it was a pain travelling to work every night (though I enjoyed driving nights). If I could find a tramping job now I would take it, unfortunately Iām the wrong side of 60 and the driver CPC is just to much money to lay out. Tramping is definately not a āsingle mans jobā, being married means appreciating your partner a lot more, seeing your partner every day can (IMHO) lead to taking your partner for granted.
Tiger.
lizard:
I have moved on to a certain degree but shes already playing the āyou cant see the kids unless you pay me cardā
Thatās bad, using the children as pawns.
You do need to pay child maintenance, there is a formula for calculating how much. Itās 15% of your nett pay for one child, 20% for two children, 25% for three etc, minus one-seventh for each night of the week they stay over with you. Your night-out money isnāt included in this calculation because it isnāt pay.
Hopefully once the dust settles you can establish a civil relationship, all the best buddy from someone whoās been there, done that and got the T shirt.
well just a quick update on my situation.
as it stands @ the moment, the flat is almost fully furnished and will be by Friday when the new suite is delivered.
the kids room is almost complete for when they stay over.
im getting access @ weekends and we are now at the point of not shouting at each other and are discussing things in a more adult manor.
I still love her and I still want her back but I think that will be a long time before we get to that stage if it is ever to happen.
Never go back. I wasted so much time and money with flats, furniture etcā¦Went back one time too many and things went mental. Stay away and look after the kids!!! 
m
bigvern1:
Never go back. I wasted so much time and money with flats, furniture etcā¦Went back one time too many and things went mental. Stay away and look after the kids!!!
I have been considering the consequences if it did get to the point I could go back but I think I will have to give it some major thinking before I make any decisions.
well single life has its benefits.
been on 2 dates over the last 2 weeks and ive managed to obtain a 2nd date with the 2nd 1 I went out with and the 1st 1 is my own personal stalker now and too top it off the ex-wife is sniffing around.
Desperate:
Women (some, not all) become use to things they generally disagree with,
Iām convinced that they marry us for that very reason.
I was doing full weeks away when the present Mrs. Sidevalve and I met, six years ago; so anything less than that was quickly regarded as a bonus. Have mostly been day-tripping for the last five years but over the last couple of months have had to do two to four nights out to get us over the bad weather/increased workload.
Not a problem for me anyway as wifey works odd-hours shifts as a bus driver so itās debatable whether weād see much more of each other if I was still away all week. She says I donāt snore as much when Iām on a night out though! 