Sorry boss, I thought the wind warning was about my breakfast.
Well boss, they said there were putting a new lane in here, nobody said anything about five years from now.
HEY CAPPO, your fired. 
Boss to driver - “When I asked if you wanted to do some work on the side for me, I did not mean like this”
New Blood
those ■■■■■■■ polish drivers! they’ve obviously had enough of the british cars!!!
dieseldave:
Karl.:
“Sporgenza buona, penso che questo sia il relativo lato migliore.”You might be right there Karl, because the truck is Italian.
Any chance of a translation so the rest of us can share the fun please
Just used one of those poxy wee translator things.
“Is it too much to ask for a tip after i have unloaded?”
New Blood
When I said “ditch the ■■■■■” I meant your wife.
Well it was valet parking boss !!!
Well, I have just checked the handbook and it does say “make sure the wheel is off the ground., before you undo the wheel nuts” . 
Well the sat nav said keep right boss
(driver) Sorry i no speaka de eengliish
(boss) Im not VOSA you tw**
Couln’t help it boss, I just bounced off a yellow hairdresser’s car…
i was busting boss 
“It was like that when I got here”
“I bet Superman can’t reverse this split in the road.”