gate ninjas 
[zb] brilliant mike 
cant stop laughing.
thanks for making making another boring sunday a bit brighter m8
excellent story very very funny top read i take my hat off to you putting the car drivers first by lighting up the road and helping them across the m62 
Brilliant …very funny diary…well done Mike.
great post delivered there last friday welcomed by the ninja happyzb ,kicked out of cab until tipped 3 hours later , 
Brillient mate, very funny and a breath of fresh air!!
I’m glad most of you enjoyed it. Sad but true, that is my normal day and that is how i view it. I only “made up” one thing, the rest is basically true, embellished a bit but true!! I have cut down now to 4 days 'cos i hate the travelling. I’ll keep my phone camera with me and give you another one soon if anything worthy of a mention comes up Guess we’re all in the same boat hey!!!
Class mate. Very enjoyable read 
what tescos own drivers doin north east deliverys out of middelwich never and in a 12hr day
and goin over 49 mph
Interesting diary and a great read.
Fantastic stuff!!!
Enjoyed that
An interesting read…made me smile a bit in places…but i have 2 comments…
- I dont believe that a tesco truck can do 60mph…even downhill…they have auto braking systems fitted to stop them doing over 50mph…
2.The rubbish you left behind in the cab, for the next driver to clear out…first i would have thrown the coffee at the windscreen…then emptied the rest over the dashboard…and empty the ashtray over the drivers seat…thats after i had asked the traffic office 1.who had that truck today 2. what truck will he be driving tomorrow…and maybe add a bit of 5th wheel grease as well…
For to leave a cab in that condition is beyond reproach…
Now I don’t normally read diaries Mike on the grounds that if there is one thing I don’t want less than a boring day in the cab it is someone else’s boring day in the cab, but I made a mistake and hit the wrong key and found myself in the middle of yours.
I enjoyed the picture of the Old Timers member lookalike (maybe it was one of us) and the obvious juxtaposition of that with the term ‘coiled spring’, and the antics of the applicant to join the ‘I don’t realise that there is a rear overhang which can bang things’ club. I especially enjoyed the deadpan response to the aspiring member’s sarcasm. Contrary to popular belief, sarcasm is almost the highest form of wit, superceded only by a reply that leaves the sarcaster totally deflated, like someone who tells a really good joke only to find no-one laughing.
I have got admit though, that the highlight was the public spirited helping hand offered, and gratefully received, by another less fortunate motorist and thereby going no small way to restore the faith and confidence we once had as Knights of the Road.
Last but not least, my day was made by Trucky’s humorous post about your behaviour. He almost had me going there thinking he was serious - nice one Bob.
Salut, David.
jessicas dad:
well done mike.
im doing driving for asda’a at the weekend now and im pretty much the same but i find cages easy no problems at all.
Well this one was my favourite, i couldn’t move for laughing. I wasn’t sure who was kidding who!!
Really depressing. Dont post this diary on the ‘very little help’ forums, you may get nominated as leader.
All the same i viewed it as it was posted-a warning to young wannabees. Stay away from tesco, you will lose the will to live.Alot to be said for your own truck and a non-■■■■ employer.
Mike 12 diaries equals book KERR-CHING
Brilliant read that mike
rofpml
Whilst loads think its funny…i think you are a class 1 “plank”!! you watch a driver struggle with a trailer and take photo’s of him bashing another trailer, no help, this is why he said thanks!!
You drive behind a slow car with your highbeam on!! do you realise what this does for car drivers? “IDIOT”
You drive a truck with a “costabomb” hot coffee to go!!
I hope you lose your licence, its people like you why all HGV drivers are tar’d with the same brush.
And not forgetting the 100 MPH in your car! clever!!
Well done, a true professional !
My Tesco transport manager mate would find this an interesting read!
Koop:
Whilst loads think its funny…i think you are a class 1 “plank”!! you watch a driver struggle with a trailer and take photo’s of him bashing another trailer, no help, this is why he said thanks!!You drive behind a slow car with your highbeam on!! do you realise what this does for car drivers? “IDIOT”
You drive a truck with a “costabomb” hot coffee to go!!
I hope you lose your licence, its people like you why all HGV drivers are tar’d with the same brush.
And not forgetting the 100 MPH in your car! clever!!
Well done, a true professional !
My Tesco transport manager mate would find this an interesting read!
^^^^^^^^^holier than thow
shut up Koop get the jist of the post then think about what you have posted!
Koop:
Whilst loads think its funny…i think you are a class 1 “plank”!! you watch a driver struggle with a trailer and take photo’s of him bashing another trailer, no help, this is why he said thanks!!
Its wierd Koop. My first instinct is to help someone who is struggling, they don’t look like particularly tight bays though, do they? Oh, and where i work now we have been instructed under no circumstances to aid any driver backing in anywhere due to one driver crushing another one who was helping to back him in. That was about three months ago, he’s out of hospital now and it doesn’t look like he’ll be going back to work at all.
Koop:
You drive behind a slow car with your highbeam on!! do you realise what this does for car drivers? “IDIOT”
Let me guess…makes them see more and go faster?!!
Koop:
You drive a truck with a “costabomb” hot coffee to go!!
I thought that was what the cup holders where designed for? No? Kinda makes you wonder what Maccy Dees drive throughs are for dunnit? I don’t reckon they all park in the car park and eat and drink do you? Besides, i don’t do that anymore, i have a kettle now and can brew on the move.
Koop:
I hope you lose your licence, its people like you why all HGV drivers are tar’d with the same brush.
Well it could certainly give me an interesting career change.
Koop:
And not forgetting the 100 MPH in your car! clever!!
Oh, it goes about 140mph, but have you ever tried to hold the camera still at that speed? Impossible i’ll tell ya, well without losing a bit of concentration it is.
Koop:
Well done, a true professional !My Tesco transport manager mate would find this an interesting read!
Please,please,please don’t tell him Koop, i’ll be good from now on, promise
Hi Mike,
Come on man! Your’e a moderator now
Some people have never been able to develop or understand what having a sense of humour means, they just don’t get it, the penny never drops, it is beyond their cognitive comprehension. Your’e either with us or against us seems to be how some of these people think