2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a
motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker
stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift. He tells
them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20,000
bowling balls but will take a look at the bike for them.
He tries everything he knows but is unable to repair it. Time is getting on
now and he’s late for his delivery so he tells the scousers he has to leave.
“R hey lad” they say “gissa lift”. The trucker once again explains that he
has no room as he is carrying 20,000 bowling balls. The scousers put it to
the driver that if they can manage to fit in the back will he take them and
he agrees.
They manage to squeeze themselves and their motorbike into the back of the
wagon so the driver shuts the doors and gets off on his way. By this time he
is really late and so puts his foot down. Sure enough PC Plod of Greater
Manchester Police pulls him up for speeding. The good officer asks the
driver what he is carrying to which he replies Scouse Eggs. The policeman
obviously doesn’t believe this so wants to take a look. He opens the back
door and quickly shuts it and locks it. He gets onto his radio and calls for
immediate backup from as many officers as possible.
The dispatcher asks what emergency he has that requires so many officers.
“I’ve got a wagon with 20,000 Scouse eggs in it - 2 have already hatched and
the [zb]s have managed to nick a motorbike already”
Very good.
Very good.
Ken.
good one
As a Scouser
A young girl runs away from home and ends up in
Liverpool looking for a ship that will take her to
America.
In a dockside pub she meets a Scouser who tells her
that he is a sailor and in return for some ■■■■■■ favours
he would stow her away on board his vessel.
So he sneaks her aboard in the dead of night and
puts her in a tiny cabin below.He tells her not to
leave the cabin and that he would return once a
day with food and water and to collect on payment.
The first week goes by without a hitch untill he tells
her that some of the crew know about the stowaway
and are demanding ■■■■■■ favours also and that she
would have to increase her output.
Anyway she puts up with a constant stream of all
sorts of blokes for three weeks untill she cannot
take anymore and in a mad rage she rushes out of
the cabin,up some stairs,along a corridor and through
a door into a passenger lounge.
She sees a little old lady sitting down and goes over to
her and says…How long till we get to America?
To which the old dear replies…Dont know chuck I only
use da ferry to get across da Mersey.