Social Anxiety Woes - dipping the toe in again

UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUMS THE UK PROFESSIONAL DRIVERS FORUM (INTERACTIVE)
61

I don’t read any headlines, so not sure why you mean there. I can’t get any benefits, that’s a fact. I tried after almost loosing my house when I was off work. I was clearly told I couldn’t as my wife worked an earned above the threshold.

I wasnt having a go at you, I even said I admired you for getting back to it but you seem to be taking anything not fawning over you as a personal attack.

Maybe read the bit where I quite clearly say I don’t know your condition and I don’t know how it affects you however can guarantee there are people in far worse positions than you. Far worse than me too.

62

109LWB:
I don’t read any headlines, so not sure why you mean there. I can’t get any benefits, that’s a fact. I tried after almost loosing my house when I was off work. I was clearly told I couldn’t as my wife worked an earned above the threshold.

I wasnt having a go at you, I even said I admired you for getting back to it but you seem to be taking anything not fawning over you as a personal attack.

Maybe read the bit where I quite clearly say I don’t know your condition and I don’t know how it affects you however can guarantee there are people in far worse positions than you. Far worse than me too.

I disagree. Your post implies that people with Mental Heath issues make it up as you can’t see it, then get handed benefits on a plate. This is the Daily Mail headlines that I was on about. In reality, people with genuine mental health issues are discriminated against both in the work place and beyond. If your honest with people you are labelled a freak, if you hide it your singled out.
When I had a near breakdown because of anxiety as a bus driver. Do you know what the bosses reaction was? Your in the wrong job. No support, nothing.

63

Hiya mate, I was wanting to ask you last time (but forgot) to focus on a point you made in your o/p, but as the thread died, I did not bother.
So as you have opened up the thread again I will ask you.
You said you have been doing voluntary work to…quote ‘‘keep yourself sane’’ you did not mention what type of work that was, but implied you were ok with it.
Bearing that in mind that the work was suitable for your condition, and that driving was not, could you not have got some type of paid employment in that particular field (whatever that was) either as a career change, or until you felt ready to start driving again as an alternative to going on benefits.

64

robroy:
Hiya mate, I was wanting to ask you last time (but forgot) to focus on a point you made in your o/p, but as the thread died, I did not bother.
So as you have opened up the thread again I will ask you.
You said you have been doing voluntary work to…quote ‘‘keep yourself sane’’ you did not mention what type of work that was, but implied you were ok with it.
Bearing that in mind that the work was suitable for your condition, and that driving was not, could you not have got some type of paid employment in that particular field (whatever that was) either as a career change, or until you felt ready to start driving again as an alternative to going on benefits.

Look mate, I appreciate your comments. However, I’m not going to use this forum to have to justify my situation.

65

metrorider:

robroy:
Hiya mate, I was wanting to ask you last time (but forgot) to focus on a point you made in your o/p, but as the thread died, I did not bother.
So as you have opened up the thread again I will ask you.
You said you have been doing voluntary work to…quote ‘‘keep yourself sane’’ you did not mention what type of work that was, but implied you were ok with it.
Bearing that in mind that the work was suitable for your condition, and that driving was not, could you not have got some type of paid employment in that particular field (whatever that was) either as a career change, or until you felt ready to start driving again as an alternative to going on benefits.

Look mate, I appreciate your comments. However, I’m not going to use this forum to have to justify my situation.

I aint asking you to justify anything, it was a valid question.
I was only commenting on the points YOU made.
YOU brought up the benefits and the terms in the first sentence of your o/p and your voluntary work as an alternative to full time work, not me.
If you did not want opinions on that aspect of it, you should not have brought it up.
It seems you only want comments from those that agree with you on certain points, so maybe I’ll just drop out of this thread if my comments make you feel uncomfortable.

Maybe you should construct your posts accordingly in future to avoid a repeat of this. :bulb: :bulb:

66

Sorry flower. Some off us just don’t care. And just get on with it.

67

robroy:

metrorider:

robroy:
Hiya mate, I was wanting to ask you last time (but forgot) to focus on a point you made in your o/p, but as the thread died, I did not bother.
So as you have opened up the thread again I will ask you.
You said you have been doing voluntary work to…quote ‘‘keep yourself sane’’ you did not mention what type of work that was, but implied you were ok with it.
Bearing that in mind that the work was suitable for your condition, and that driving was not, could you not have got some type of paid employment in that particular field (whatever that was) either as a career change, or until you felt ready to start driving again as an alternative to going on benefits.

Look mate, I appreciate your comments. However, I’m not going to use this forum to have to justify my situation.

I aint asking you to justify anything, it was a valid question.
I was only commenting on the points YOU made.
YOU brought up the benefits and the terms in the first sentence of your o/p and your voluntary work as an alternative to full time work, not me.
If you did not want opinions on that aspect of it, you should not have brought it up.
It seems you only want comments from those that agree with you on certain points, so maybe I’ll just drop out of this thread if my comments make you feel uncomfortable.

Maybe you should construct your posts accordingly in future to avoid a repeat of this. :bulb: :bulb:

Big +1. I too was wondering what work he was doing voluntarily that he was obviously ok with.
As you say, he wants us all to pet him and say there there.
Ain’t gonna happen, especially with an attitude like that.

It was a perfectly valid question, if you can do the work fine without being paid, then why not look at doing the same sort of work whilst being paid, makes perfect sense.

68

109LWB:

robroy:

metrorider:

robroy:
Hiya mate, I was wanting to ask you last time (but forgot) to focus on a point you made in your o/p, but as the thread died, I did not bother.
So as you have opened up the thread again I will ask you.
You said you have been doing voluntary work to…quote ‘‘keep yourself sane’’ you did not mention what type of work that was, but implied you were ok with it.
Bearing that in mind that the work was suitable for your condition, and that driving was not, could you not have got some type of paid employment in that particular field (whatever that was) either as a career change, or until you felt ready to start driving again as an alternative to going on benefits.

Look mate, I appreciate your comments. However, I’m not going to use this forum to have to justify my situation.

I aint asking you to justify anything, it was a valid question.
I was only commenting on the points YOU made.
YOU brought up the benefits and the terms in the first sentence of your o/p and your voluntary work as an alternative to full time work, not me.
If you did not want opinions on that aspect of it, you should not have brought it up.
It seems you only want comments from those that agree with you on certain points, so maybe I’ll just drop out of this thread if my comments make you feel uncomfortable.

Maybe you should construct your posts accordingly in future to avoid a repeat of this. :bulb: :bulb:

Big +1. I too was wondering what work he was doing voluntarily that he was obviously ok with.
As you say, he wants us all to pet him and say there there.
Ain’t gonna happen, especially with an attitude like that.

It was a perfectly valid question, if you can do the work fine without being paid, then why not look at doing the same sort of work whilst being paid, makes perfect sense.

I said I would leave it, but just to address your point,
I didn’t actually say the ‘‘petting there there’’ bit tbf mate.

I just thought that his first priority (as mine would be) would be to get off benefits and back to work, rather than to get back driving.
He said the voluntary work was in his words ‘‘Keeping him sane’’ so why not capitalise on it and ask if driving is actually the right line of work for him.
Who knows, it’s maybe the driving job that is the cause of the way he feels.
Maybe he realises that himself and chooses not to admit it, who knows…who cares.

69

bald bloke:
Why don’t you try a night trunking job especially on a weekend when some companies are struggling for drivers, with that kind of run you’ll earn a decent wage for one night and you’ll probably just do a trailer swap without even the possibility of actually meeting anyone.

Just a thought .

How about a part time job shunting? You’d never have to worry about being nice to anyone…[emoji1]

Sent from my VIE-L09 using Tapatalk

70

robroy:
Apart from that, does it not also send out the wrong message to the workshy, to jump on the benefits bandwagon using these sort of things as an excuse, and an easier alternative to getting up at 4am for a 15 hour day in a truck…I mean you can even get benefits for self inflicted obesity these days.

But the man clearly wants to work!

And given that a driver could easily earn in one day’s work, what they will receive on ESA, hardly suggests it is an alternative to working.

If you’re a workshy driver, you’d just work one day a week on an agency and be done with it! Without having to jump all the hoops of feigning mental illness, having ludicrous “medical” examinations, and having to keep up appearances and being subject to restrictions on working when your laziness temporarily abates and you do want to do more!

I’ve encountered a lot of benefit claimants over the years in various settings. Do you know how many I’ve encountered who gave up decent, steady work to claim any kind of benefits? None. I know of only one recent case of a family man who gave up minimum wage night work on agency, because on top of the obvious hardship of night working, their rent arrears spiralled due to the inadequacy and insecurity of their wages from week to week.

It’s worth repeating that point again. Nobody ever gave up decent, steady work to live on benefits. The absence of decent, steady work, always comes first before a benefit claim.

71

robroy:

metrorider:
I’m currently on ESA benefit long term, now 2 years due to Social Anxiety/Avoidant personality disorder issues stretching back years. Have LGV C with all upto date CPC/Digi etc but never had real chance to use it. I also was a bus driver for 18 months in 2000 but again was unable to stay due to anxiety issues.
I get frustrated not being able to use my driving skills, as I’m a very confident driver. The problems manifest when I have to face co workers, deal with customers. It can take it out of me at times.
The rules of ESA allow me to try some work upto 15 hours a week without loss of benefits - it’s called Permitted Work. I’ve seen a weekend LGV C job with Driver Hire in Bristol and I’m keen on trying it. I’m 48 so well aware how agencies work so not holding out much hope or whether as the job even exists.

Anyone been in a similar situation and willing to offer any advice/tips?

Cheers

I know nothing about your ‘condition’ mate, that and the fact that I am not the most sympathetic of blokes in general, (and especially to this sort of modern type of diagnostic buzz word lable put on things) maybe I should not comment as it may cause offence.

However you brought this up on a public forum to attract opinion, and although maybe mine is not the type of response you want or expected, I will try and be tactful here.

If they give out ‘benefits’ for this sort of thing as an alternative to work to guys like yourself that are otherwise physically fit, …Does that not only go to exacerbate the situation and give you an excuse (for the want of a better phrase) not to face up to this way that you feel, to try and beat it and lead a normal working life?

Apart from that, does it not also send out the wrong message to the workshy, to jump on the benefits bandwagon using these sort of things as an excuse, and an easier alternative to getting up at 4am for a 15 hour day in a truck…I mean you can even get benefits for self inflicted obesity these days.

As I said mate, I don’t know the next thing to jack [zb] about your stated condition, but I personally am more inclined to try and face up to crap dished out to me in life, and try and get on with it, and have done in the past, .rather than look for an easier and financial laden alternative.

I will undoubtedly get stick from some on this opinion, and I know this will maybe offend you, if so I apologise.
However, no apologies to the liberal left yoghurt knitters on here who will be offended by proxy :unamused: , and will think I am being unduly harsh…I aint, it’s just my opinion being a ‘black and white’ type of guy, I can’t help it.

If you are wanting to get off benefits and back into full time work, the only thing I can say is Good luck with it.

I totally respect rob because he has helped me when I needed it and really dug me out of a hole.

I have schizophrenia, I’ve suffered with it lifelong and I agree with rob, I frequently have to give myself a kick up the arse, nobody can do it other than yourself. The answer to your problems lies with yourself.

I was on benefits for years while I was ill, I started on volunteer work, then worked part time doing permitted work for a year then I moved into full time work and I have worked full time from then to now.

If you feel that permitted work is for you, go for it, at least it is a start. The things to be aware of is that there is a limit on what you can earn per week. It used to be 101 pounds per week, but that may have changed, you should check into that because you don’t want your earnings going above the threshold as they will stop your benefits. Driving is unpredictable as you may get stuck in traffic and take your earnings above what you are permitted. The last thing that you need to know is that you can only do it for a year, then you need to make a choice, benefits or full time work.

Be well my friend, hope things work out for you.

72

metrorider:
I’m currently on ESA benefit long term, now 2 years due to Social Anxiety/Avoidant personality disorder issues stretching back years. Have LGV C with all upto date CPC/Digi etc but never had real chance to use it. I also was a bus driver for 18 months in 2000 but again was unable to stay due to anxiety issues.
I get frustrated not being able to use my driving skills, as I’m a very confident driver. The problems manifest when I have to face co workers, deal with customers. It can take it out of me at times.
The rules of ESA allow me to try some work upto 15 hours a week without loss of benefits - it’s called Permitted Work. I’ve seen a weekend LGV C job with Driver Hire in Bristol and I’m keen on trying it. I’m 48 so well aware how agencies work so not holding out much hope or whether as the job even exists.

Anyone been in a similar situation and willing to offer any advice/tips?

Cheers

I had a similar experience years ago and was on ESA for 2 years. I wanted to get back driving but wasn’t ready, but really wanted to work. I got a job in my local co-op delivering shopping in a little van. Was only 3 hours a day and I could keep myself to myself… This may not be for you amigo but it helped me no end! Those 15 hours of permitted work enabled me to slowly get back into society. …6 months later I was back driving proper- albeit hitting the odd string of low lights… . Hope this helps mate…

Sent from my VIE-L09 using Tapatalk