I meet them everyday,they have never driven a truck,but advise me on how to reverse or get in to their premises,with small talk like,we had an artic in here last week,he got in ok,but what he fails to mention that the so called artic was a transit van.
And they say,the last driver got in here ok,with no problem.Then comes,you are not the regular driver that comes then?
I delivered Rolls of tetra pack to a Dairy and couldnt leave anymore as the Trailer was then too high for the roof,even with lowered suspension 
I will let them try it,and say you drive it then,lol. 
I get it all the time being rigid with 16 feet of beaver tail past the back wheels
Oh an artic can in here yeah well I don’t bend in the [zb] middle do I
I think we have all had this at some point in our career, best response I have had was when I was told that “our driver reverses in here all the time”, (reverse on the blind side to a 90 degree bay with an out building in front that the cab wont pass) right so I said “where is your driver”? “That’s him over there” so I approached this guy and asked if he could back my artic in as I couldn’t get it in here, he said “sorry mate I don’t have a truck licence, I only drive the van”!! 
had a pickup in a place in Penrith just west of Sydney one day with the Bdouble (26 metres), finally found the place after driving past it, did a block and came back to it, stopped outside for 5 minutes and considered how utterly ridiculous this was for someone to send a bdouble in here the gate was so tight.
Got the prick in eventually anyway, somehow without wrecking the place, and the staff all just stand there staring at me, then start clapping.
I gets out, emmm load for melbourne?
Yeah youre in the wrong place, its across the street.
Why are you all clapping?
Because our own bdouble driver refuses to come in here he says it cant be done.
Oh ok.
Little did i I realise that getting out was going to be twice as much ■■■■■ fun
brados:
I think we have all had this at some point in our career, best response I have had was when I was told that “our driver reverses in here all the time”, (reverse on the blind side to a 90 degree bay with an out building in front that the cab wont pass) right so I said “where is your driver”? “That’s him over there” so I approached this guy and asked if he could back my artic in as I couldn’t get it in here, he said “sorry mate I don’t have a truck licence, I only drive the van”!!
Sounds like a joke, but sadly true.
i get that all the time being a dustcart driver, we get a new loader and hes telling me how to drive the thing when ive been doing the job longer than him AND ive had my driving license for 13 years with various drving jobs yet this prat hasnt got a car license himself… that really annoys me
I usually find this stops the experts
The world is full of experts that can do my job better than me, baffles me why I am still employed to do it.
waddy640:
The world is full of experts that can do my job better than me, baffles me why I am still employed to do it.
Well said.
Definition of an expert:-
Ex…As in, has been
Spurt…A drip, under pressure
I once went to a place in Aston Clinton, Bucks. Only had a couple of pallets to get off, the bloke tells me to back in, I questioned that to be told, we get lorries in here all the time, so I had a go and did it in one go 
I was in a left ■■■■■■ F12 so I backed in to my left, the cut of the kerbs into the entrance favoured backing in that way, I did wonder how you’d get in there from the other side with a right hand drive, but not that much, I was in and that was all I had to worry about.
I opened the curtain and waited for the bloke to come out on the forklift, when he did the look on his face was a picture. ‘How the ■■■■ did you get that [zb]ing great thing in here?’ he asked ‘I thought you were in a 7.5tonner!’
It was one of those days where I got it just right, I bet that I couldn’t get in there 99 times out of a hundred, in fact I had to take a shunt or two to get out forwards but that day I did it, just wish that there was the usual crowd of drivers hanging around like there is when you’re having a bad day
newmercman:
just wish that there was the usual crowd of drivers hanging around like there is when you’re having a bad day
Well done from me anyway!
Struggled for half an hour to unload two bulk bags with a Hiab, and finally made it. “The regular driver (I was agency) didn’t have that much trouble last week” says the Foreman. " Mind you, we hadn’t built that wall then" He nearly got the notes up his orrifice!
Well once loaded for European Freightbus in South London rope and sheet with a Leyland Marathron for MCR to Leeds almost a weeks work and couldnt get out the wharehouse and only a small headboard, so a bit later i left with still a very high load.
Best i had was in Italy i think i was pulling for Laser took back a full load of reject plastic shoes, man says drive down there and back up, so i took a walk and said i will sink in the soft ground [ all in in itailean of course ] so half hour of this i said well i will just put in zb and i got stuck , then they got a crane [ gru ] to pull me out and i tipped , oh then the crane driver asked me to pay thats when i walked to the trees and spoke with them and i never paid , i was an OD running the wire and cherry so of course i didnt pay.
But years before i did go to a factory i dont remember where and the forman said its a hard place to reverse into watch me and he was Spot On, was he an ex driver or just an expert at his factory
toby1234abc:
I meet them everyday,they have never driven a truck,but advise me on how to reverse or get in to their premises,with small talk like,we had an artic in here last week,he got in ok,but what he fails to mention that the so called artic was a transit van.
And they say,the last driver got in here ok,with no problem.Then comes,you are not the regular driver that comes then?
I’m no expert but I can jump out of my truck and weigh up an awkward collection or delivery quicker than it takes me to put my hi~vis on.
I don’t give a flying ■■■■ what the ‘experts’ think, one way or the other…
W
When Oxford Prison was redeveloped there was a 360 driver who thought he was boss; If you drove in and he wanted you to reverse he’d throw a fit. He’d put comments on our muck tickets like not full load and complain if we left our engines ticking over in winter…He was a sadcase who’d never been married and still lived with his elderly mother.
ladder49:
I get it all the time being rigid with 16 feet of beaver tail past the back wheelsOh an artic can in here yeah well I don’t bend in the [zb] middle do I
Same, I just tell people that artics have better drivers.
I used to do Harmondsworth IRC and to get in the “in” gate you had to put the front wheel across the landscaped border. They’d go ■■■■■■■ nuts about it, but it was a new build place and they’d obviously only considered getting smaller vehicles in. Oh well you’ll have to use the “out” gate then they’d finally admit. Only the gatehouse would have none of it and insist you use the correct side.
Always happy to oblige