Reasons to be Proud of being English

[daxi]

muckles:
Hey but at least the smell keeps your cousin from wanting to marry you. Oh I live in Norfolk so that might not be quite true
:

You were refering to holiday makers at sandringham I assume & not those who live too close to the Fens.

[jb]

kitkat:

Reasons to be Proud of being English

sorry can’t think of one good reason why you’d want to be proud of being english

tin hat is on

do yer best

PROUD TO BE ENGLISH BECAUSE WE DONT WEAR SKIRTS JIMMY…

[wheel_nut]

Why would a true Scot want to hang a St Georges flag outside his home
What is wrong with the Saltire

and

According to a recent survey, the average british man wears his underpants for 2 days although if you are desperate you can stretch this to 4 days by turning them inside out

and

It could be a lot worse, We could be Ginger and Welsh

[jammymutt]

JB:
PROUD TO BE ENGLISH BECAUSE WE DONT WEAR SKIRTS JIMMY… :

I prefer the skirt to the gay dancing myself.

[ralliesport]

jammymutt:
I prefer the skirt to the gay dancing myself.

a proud scottish trannie

ps Kate, notice how its isnt the english members that spit the dummy out?

[kitkat]

ps Kate, notice how its isnt the english members that spit the dummy out

there’s a 1st for everything

[eddie_snax]

Ladytrucker679:
Bathe once a week, isn’t that a bit excessive!
The next thing she’ll want is for us to go to the dentist!!!

Dentist regular as clock work, once every 20 years without fail.
Bath we just run into the sea on new years day , 27 days to go, but i’m not sure i need to this year
As for the smelly mud muppets in breckland, they rarely come to these parts so cant think how thay get clean, probably let daisy lick them all over hell i’m moving to breckland make way Muckles

[jb]

jammymutt:

JB:
PROUD TO BE ENGLISH BECAUSE WE DONT WEAR SKIRTS JIMMY… :

I prefer the skirt and the gay dancing myself.

i think you made a typo there jammy…

[slackmack]

Kate failed to post the whole joke…

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING GERMAN:

1. Mulletts always in fashion.
2. Patent leather shoes.
3. Indicators optional.
4. In-built sense of pacifism.
5. In-built sense of pacifism.
6. In-built sense of pacifism.
7. In-built sense of pacifism.
8. In-built sense of pacifism.
9. In-built sense of pacifism.
10. In-built sense of pacifism.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING WELSH:

1. You’ve got to be joking, right?

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING FRENCH:

1. When speaking fast you can sound gay
2. Yet to experience the joy of winning the Rugby World Cup for the first time
3. You get to eat jungle food like snails and frog’s legs
4. If there’s a war you can surrender really early
5. You don’t have to read the subtitles on those late night films on Channel 4.
6. You can test your own nuclear weapons in other people’s countries
7. You can be ugly and still become a famous film star
8. Germans march up and down your most famous streets humiliating your sense of national pride
9. You don’t have to bother with toilets
10. People think you’re a great lover even when you’re not

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AMERICAN:

1. You have a woman president without electing her.
2. You can spell colour wrong.
3. You can call Budweiser beer.
4. You can be a crook and still be president.
5. If you’ve got enough money you can get elected to do anything.
6. If you can breathe calmly when you can buy a gun.
7. You can play golf in the most hideous clothes ever made and nobody seems to care.
8. You can think you’re the greatest nation on earth.
9. When you’re not.
10. At all.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING ITALIAN:

1. In-depth knowledge of bizarre pasta shapes.
2. Not embarrassed to wear fur.
3. No need to worry about tax returns.
4. Glorious military history until 400 AD.
5. Can wear sunglasses indoors.
6. Political stability.
7. Flexible working hours.
8. Live near the Pope.
9. Can spend hours braiding girlfriend’s hair.
10. Be governed by Sicilian murderers.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING SPANISH:

1. Glorious history of killing South American tribes.
2. The rest of Europe thinks Africa begins at the Pyrenees.
3. You get your beaches invaded by Germans, Danes, and Brits etc.
4. The rest of your country is already invaded by Moroccans.
5. Everybody makes crap paella and claims it’s the real thing.
6. Honesty.
7. Only sure way of getting a woman is to dress up in bright, tight clothes and risk your life in front of bulls.
8. Eating bulls’ testicles.
9. Gibraltar.
10. Fan of Argentina during the Falklands War.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING INDIAN:

1. Chicken Madras
2. Lamb Passanda
3. Onion Bhaji
4. Bombay Potato
5. Chicken Tikka Masala
6. Rogan Josh
7. Popadoms
8. Chisken Dopiaza
9. Meat Boona
10. Kingfisher lager

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING IRISH:

1. Guinness.
2. 18 children because you can’t use contraceptives.
3. You can get into a fight just by marching down someone’s road.
4. Pubs never close.
5. Can use Papal edicts on contraception passed in the second Vatican Council of 1968.
6. No one can ever remember the night before.
7. Kill people you don’t agree with.
8. Stew.
9. More Guinness.
10. Eating stew and drinking Guinness in an Irish pub at 3 in the morning after a bout of sectarian violence.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING CANADIAN:

1. It beats being an American.
2. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
3. You can play hockey 12 months a year, outdoors.
4. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
5. Where else can you travel 1000 miles over fresh water in a canoe?
6. A political leader can admit to smoking pot and his/her popularity ratings will rise.
7. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.
8. Kill Grizzly bears with huge shotguns and cover your house in their skins
9. Own-an-Eskimo scheme.
10. Only country to successfully invade the US and burn its capital to the ground.

TOP 10 REASONS FOR BEING AUSTRALIAN:

1. Know your great granddad was a murderer that no other nation would touch with a barge pole.
2. Fosters Lager.
3. Dispossess Aborigines who have lived in your country for 10,000 years because you think it belongs to you.
4. Annihilate England every time you play them at cricket.
5. Tact and sensitivity.
6. Bondi Beach.
7. Most other beaches in Australia.
8. Liberated attitude to homosexuals.
9. Drinking cold lager on the beach.
10. Having a bit of a swim and then drink some cold lager on the beach.

[truckyboy]

Absolutely brilliant…but not forgetting that it was we who discovered america.
we who discovered indians
we who took the english language over there
and the americans who (zb) it up
so who is the greatest nation in the world…we are…

[kate_hasler]

truckyboy:
Absolutely brilliant…but not forgetting that it was we who discovered america.
we who discovered indians
we who took the english language over there
and the americans who (zb) it up
so who is the greatest nation in the world…we are…

PMSL… was sure it was Christopher Columbus that got credit for discovering America…he was born in Genoa, Italy… duh! So the first settlers on this great nation were Italians… And if you’re one of those that gives credit to Amerigo Vespucci,… he was Spanish. And since one of those two were the actual “discoverer” of America, it was them that also discovered the Indians. Love how the English take credit for things they had nothing to do with.

You may have brought the English language over here… but we perfected it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

And it was the English that LOST America… can’t be that great then, otherwise we’d still be talking like you lot!!!

[gearjammer]

You may have brought the English language over here… but we perfected it. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

and now call it American