Q: What’s the best form of birth control after 50?
A: ■■■■■■
Q: What’s the difference between a girlfriend and a
wife?
A: 45 lbs.
Q: What’s the difference between a boyfriend and a
husband?
A: 45 minutes.
Q: How many women does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None, they just sit there in the dark and ■■■■■.
Q. What’s the fastest way to a man’s heart?
A. Through his chest with a sharp knife.
Q. Why are men and parking spaces alike?
A. Because all the good ones are gone and the only
ones left are disabled.
Q. What have men and floor tiles got in common?
A. If you lay them properly the first time, you can
walk all over them for life.
Q. Why do men want to marry virgins?
A. They can’t stand criticism.
Q. Why is it so hard for women to find men that are
sensitive, caring, and good looking?
A. Because those men already have boyfriends.
Q. What’s the difference between a new husband and a
new dog?
A. After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
Q. What makes men chase women they have no intention
of
marrying?
A. The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have
no intention of driving.
Q. What is the biggest problem for an atheist?
A. No one to talk to during ■■■■■■.
Q. What do you call a smart blonde?
A. A golden retriever.
Q. Who is the most popular guy at the nudist colony?
A. The guy who can carry a cup of coffee in each hand
and a dozen donuts.
Q. Who is the most popular girl at the nudist colony?
A. She is the one who can eat the last ■■■■■!
Q. Why does the bride always wear white?
A. Because it’s good for the dishwasher to match the
stove and refrigerator.
Q. A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in
third grade. Who has the biggest ■■■■■?
A. The blonde, because she’s 18.
Q. Why do men snore when they lay on their backs?
A. Because their testicles fall over their ■■■■ and
they vapor-lock.