A Truckers whose been tramping a long and hard three weeks, pulls into a brother in Manchester, takes £500 out of his back pocket, puts it onto the counter and says, Madam, I want your ugliest woman and a burnt chop. Madam replies, but Sir, with that sort of money you can have my best girl and a three course meal? Trucker replies, Madam, I’m not ■■■■■, I’m homesick.
For a moment I thought it was a story about Wayne Rooney
Keep the jokes coming we all need a good laugh at this time.
Stay safe boys
A bloke goes to the Docs to get his results back from covid 19.
The Doc tells him
" I’m sorry but I have some bad news for you,its worse than we thought,your ok for covid but you have a strain of Aids called HIV 556".
" What does that mean" says the bloke.
" It means you’ll be dead in 3 days" says the Doc
So he goes home and tells his mum " I’ve got HIV 556 I’ll be dead in 3 days". She says " Well, come down the bingo hall with me tonight.
“THE BINGO HALL !!!
THE BINGO HALL I’ll be dead in 3 days whats the point?”
“Just come down anyway she says”. So he goes to the bingo.
He won everything, 4 corners, any line, full house.
Up comes the National Grid, he won £87k.
The bingo caller said " Son I’ve never seen someone so luck in my life !"
“LUCKY !” he said
“LUCKY ! I’ve got HIV556!!!”
The bingo caller said " **** me you’ve won the raffle as well!!"
dieseldog999:
A bloke goes to the Docs to get his results back from covid 19.
The Doc tells him
" I’m sorry but I have some bad news for you,its worse than we thought,your ok for covid but you have a strain of Aids called HIV 556"." What does that mean" says the bloke.
" It means you’ll be dead in 3 days" says the DocSo he goes home and tells his mum " I’ve got HIV 556 I’ll be dead in 3 days". She says " Well, come down the bingo hall with me tonight.
“THE BINGO HALL !!!
THE BINGO HALL I’ll be dead in 3 days whats the point?”
“Just come down anyway she says”. So he goes to the bingo.He won everything, 4 corners, any line, full house.
Up comes the National Grid, he won £87k.The bingo caller said " Son I’ve never seen someone so luck in my life !"
“LUCKY !” he said
“LUCKY ! I’ve got HIV556!!!”
The bingo caller said " **** me you’ve won the raffle as well!!"
Ohhhhhhhh bravo.