due to a diabolic performance in ther league, alex fergusson decides he needs a new striker, but he has no money, especially after rooney,s pay out.
anyhow he decides to send his scouts to the four corners of the world to find an undiscovered talent.
several months later , one of the scouts is in war torn bolivia and spots this sixteen year old lad playing soccer in his bare feet. the kid is amazing. alex flys out, has a look and signs him up straight away.
1st game in the new season the kid gets a hatrick, and this continues throughout the season,2,3,4 goals a game.
eventually they end up in the champions league final up against real madrid, and the kid scores two goals giving man utd the cup. the kid is over the moon, its the happiest day of his life.
well, the team are celabrating in the changing rooms, champagne flowing everywhere when all of a sudden the phone goes. its the kids mum.
“oh mum, im so happy , we won the cup”,
she says “i know son, well done, but i have a bit of bad news for you”
“what is it ma”
“well son, our house was set fire to in the middle of the night and your father and brother were shot dead this morning, and finally after getting gang raped by a gang of youths your sister was killed also”.
the poor lad is gutted.
" mum, i dont know what to say, this is terrible, is there anything i can do"
MUM SAYS
“is there anything you can do!!!, its all your fault in the first place son”
“how do you figure that out mum”
WELL WE DID,NT HAVE TO MOVE TO MANCHESTER 
