Lorry driving is a lonely job, you can spend all day and not speak to anyone.
When parking for the night, the camaraderie went years ago and now drivers shut their cab curtains and avoid contact.
I think it may be an age thing as when i was younger i never worried about anything i just got on with it but as you get older i think with the responsibility you take on ect you just get more anxious about stuff, also years ago you didn’t seem to hear about accidents every other day but now with the media every thing is out there you seem to read about accidents every other day
I got my class one over 20 years ago, but drove nothing but class two all the while, until about five years ago when my boss asked me if I wanted some artic work. Although nervous at the prospect, I agreed, & did the odd Glasgow-South run, (mainly so I could tell all my mates I was a ‘proper’ driver!). At first I was very average, but didn’t hit anything & eventually improved, even cracking reversing onto tight bays without attracting an amused audience.
Although I do class two 99.9% of the time without a second thought & can squeeze it into the tightest spaces, I still baulk at the prospect of piloting a bendy truck, especially if I have to go to an unfamiliar drop, or one I know to be a bit tight (Co-op Newhouse, anyone?). Also, my firm have recently taken delivery of some 15ft 7 trailers - three feet higher than I’m used to, & that creates a whole new set of problems to think about.
In fact I’ve recently said to my boss I’d rather not be considered for a class one shift in the foreseeable future, until I gain some confidence…if I ever do; it was just too far out of the comfort zone.
Best to know your limits & stay within them, than be a hero & come to grief…
Interesting to read about this I’m just back driving class 1 after ten years through what I imagine is to a degree similar. I had been driving artics about 3 years and one day coming down windy hill on M62 had a ‘do’ with myself-full on panic, imagined I couldnt feel my hands on the wheel or feet on the pedals and totally sht myself thinking I was gonna die etc etc. I carried on driving (gritted teeth) for another few weeks before parking in a MSA thinking that was my driving career over. Which it was for a while as I’d frightened myself so much I couldnt go downhill (or over a high bridge) in a car for a while either ffs! Anyway got a crap job away from driving for a couple of years then started (god knows why) wanting to drive again. I then did 4 years on class 2 local multi drop and proved to myself I could still do it and had no recurring effects so when that job came to an end I sort of felt that I had ‘unfinished business’ with class 1. First week on the job on the thursday I’d reloaded in Leeds at 44t and it was snowing and I have to say I didn’t know how I was feeling about decending windy hill again after so long but it was just fine and such a relief to have that ‘unfinished stuff’ out of the way. I know now what the cause(s) of the problem is/was and I personally would recommend seeing the Dr. etc but even though it feels like its all over (which makes you feel even worse perhaps!) for you sometimes time out is whats needed. TMs and bosses (imo) perhaps aren’t the people to be confiding in as not all are particularly charitable/intellegent/human/competent and they will also write your next reference maybe…need to know, which they don’t. Good luck to the ops colleague.
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jay0:
I blame it on your every move being recorded by the trackers nowadays it puts more pressure on drivers because for example if you take a wrong turn somewhere and end up being late for a delivery you can’t blame anyone else and with planners planning everything so tight it doesn’t leave any room for error.
Reason I say that is because a few months ago I went to deliver to a place I hadn’t been before and all was good I was only a few minutes away from the place and I was going to be there on time but didn’t i take the wrong turn off a roundabout and had to drive 7 odd miles out the road to get turned around and then sit in the traffic all the way back in it. By the time I got to the delivery I’d missed my slot by a half hour and was told to come back in two and a half hours. Rang the office and needless to say they weren’t one bit impressed but it was just one of them things, [zb] happens but had it not been planned so tight id have made the delivery slot the first time round.
Agree,your not given a second these days ,lately it’s arrive rsu 11.57, arrive dc 11.58, depart dc 11.59,
The other day they put my job up on ISO- trac as leave dc 17.00, it was 16.45 , I was a hour away ,on m1 on a fri afternoon 
It doesn’t matter if I go out on 2 nd / 3rd run with 1 or 5 drops I’m down as being back at own depot at the same time .
All I get is you know the score ,it’s just getting bloody stupid ,they’ve now turned the hose pipe off in yard as apparently if you wash your mirrors windows down before you leave ,your not actually cleaning them your just tossing it off for 2/3 mins
I can understand how it gets too some lads ,but it’s not our fault ( drivers ) they can’t make money ,it’s the bloody idiot who prices the job up ,time they all just charged what the job cost 
and got off our backs
ZigZag:
seth 70:
toby1234abc:
It sounds like depression or anxiety, Boots sell Kalms, a natural herbal remedy with dried lettuce and Valerian, to sooth the nerves.Its past the kalms stage toby,you could eat a case full of them things and nowt would happen apart from having a day constantly ■■■■■■■
I took Kalms when i was a bus driver. Worked a treat for me and don’t think i could have gone into work each day to face the public without them. .
I bet your passengers weren’t as happy facing you though, if what Seth says about them is right 
I would buy them just for that effect but that’s just me.
dozy:
jay0:
I blame it on your every move being recorded by the trackers nowadays it puts more pressure on drivers because for example if you take a wrong turn somewhere and end up being late for a delivery you can’t blame anyone else and with planners planning everything so tight it doesn’t leave any room for error.
Reason I say that is because a few months ago I went to deliver to a place I hadn’t been before and all was good I was only a few minutes away from the place and I was going to be there on time but didn’t i take the wrong turn off a roundabout and had to drive 7 odd miles out the road to get turned around and then sit in the traffic all the way back in it. By the time I got to the delivery I’d missed my slot by a half hour and was told to come back in two and a half hours. Rang the office and needless to say they weren’t one bit impressed but it was just one of them things, [zb] happens but had it not been planned so tight id have made the delivery slot the first time round.Agree,your not given a second these days ,lately it’s arrive rsu 11.57, arrive dc 11.58, depart dc 11.59,
The other day they put my job up on ISO- trac as leave dc 17.00, it was 16.45 , I was a hour away ,on m1 on a fri afternoon
It doesn’t matter if I go out on 2 nd / 3rd run with 1 or 5 drops I’m down as being back at own depot at the same time .
All I get is you know the score ,it’s just getting bloody stupid ,they’ve now turned the hose pipe off in yard as apparently if you wash your mirrors windows down before you leave ,your not actually cleaning them your just tossing it off for 2/3 mins
I can understand how it gets too some lads ,but it’s not our fault ( drivers ) they can’t make money ,it’s the bloody idiot who prices the job up ,time they all just charged what the job cost
I can sympathise fully with the o/p’s mate, and these guys that get stressed with the job to a point where it is a problem.
I am fortunate enough to be able to cope with pressure and ■■■■ that life brings for eg in my case bankruptcy loss of home etc all down to the job in the distant past. However everybody is different and I consider myself lucky to be the way I am in that context.
If the effects of the job are effecting your life to that point, as has been said a visit to the Doc is the first step as a nervous affected non confident driver in charge of 44 tonnes is a lethal combination.
Reading jay and dozy’s posts (assuming being dozy it aint exaggerated) I aint surprised that some drivers go this way.
Those conditions to work under are absolutely ■■■■■■ ridiculous 
how the hell was it ever allowed to evolve over the years to that state, where you are scheduled to + or - 2 minutes or whatever,
Personally I would not work for that sort of regime, does anybody else on here work under those conditions or is doze on a wind up. IF it is true the drivers regs to prevent fatigue and stress down to driving become a paradox. Ireckon even I would become stressed out big style having to work for those ■■■■ s.
I have a lot of sympathy for the OPs mate the job is hard enough on some routes nowadays without office muppets adding pressure. Suggest the driver sees their GP, in the meantime cut out the caffeine and fizzy drinks especially the likes of red bull, monster etc., as I’ve found they can really put you on a downer .
As to the Kalms, St John’s Wort and similar I’d only use them to sleep or days when I wasn’t driving as they can affect your concentration. What can really help your mood and focus is a couple of drops of Rosemary essential oil on the inside of your sleeve near your pulse points.
Every now and again I can feel my performance slipping, which in turn can affect confidence, nothing major but little things telling me I need to have a long weekend or a week away from driving so I do. Easy enough to do on agency but not for a company driver.
It’s ironic how being a lorry driver is supposed to give you a sense of freedom and being your own boss etc but with the office bods taking more control and trying to be super efficient with the help of technology It seems alot of the freedom has gone and it’s obviously having an effect on drivers well being.
I’ve had a couple of episodes of severe lack of confidence and anxiousness about driving lorries. It’s got to a point where I’ve worked myself up so much the night before and called in sick. It’s not nice and I’m seriously considering leaving my job and finding 3.5t van work.
This is exactly what has happened to me, I really dont want to do it anymore, but how do you go about a new career direction when you are having a mid life crisis? 
my grandad used to be a coach driver,and was constantly stressed on long distance runs with having to keep to tight schedules timed rest stops,and booking everyone into hotels etc to the point he was a bag of nerves from being ran ragged trying to cope with the demands of his job.the only respite he eventually got was when he passed away quietly in his sleep one night…which was quite a feat as all his passengers were screaming and shouting at the time. 
Bikemonkey:
This is exactly what has happened to me, I really dont want to do it anymore, but how do you go about a new career direction when you are having a mid life crisis?
you think of a different line of work and go do it . i made sure i burnt my bridges in my previous line of work so there was little chance of me returning to it.
think i read somewhere that its healthy for the mind to have a total change of direction,a freshening up.
I think all drivers will suffer from a lack of confidence some times, more so the Arctic drivers. The fact is you are driving one of the largest vehicles on the road and you are you going to places which are not designed to handle an arctic. That’s why the job is a skilled job and not everyone can do it.