so what does ambition get you 
bigger house bigger car bigger holiday
its all about oneupmanship if you ask me....and i dont buy it.
i was once reading about the pros and cons of being a lorry driver and one of the cons was “low social status”…who to exactly anyone that considers themselves better than me just because of the job i do is irrelivant as far as im concerned because they wont be part of my life…end of.
perhaps im a simpleton...i dont know,easily contented perhaps,i`m just not interested in materialistic stuff.
just had a call off the agency…job tomorrow 1100…few beers tonight and then monster trucks for cash 
■■■■ ambition 
Gentlemen, thank you. There is some really insightful stuff been posted here, and i’ve bookmarked the thread and will no doubt be coming back to read it regularly.
switchlogic:
I’m very ambitious, but not for money or job titles or status but for happiness.
Thats a nice way to look at it, and is pretty much the way I see things. I find it surprising though the amount of people who are simply unable to see it that way. Ambition = career, to far too many people it would seem.
dinostevus:
How old are you? Is this online dating thing a scam or is it OK? You hear so much bad press about how they keep wanting money from you. Anyway, good luck to you.
I’m 26.
I have used a free site so far (plenty of fish), so it hasn’t cost me anything (apart from time, a fair bit of time, a lot of it wasted). I would be tempted by the reputable pay sites, like eHarmony or Match.com if I thought they would yield better results, so far uncertain on that.
The scams seem to come from sites that people use to hook up for a ■■■, they appeal very cleverly to mens’ insecurities (like the emails selling ■■■■■ enlargement, for example), so it’s no surprise people find themselves subscribed at great cost, only to find that no genuine women exist on there. It should be obvious to most, that no woman has to resort to using a sleazy website if they just want a bit of ■■■.
As strange as this may sound, I have no interest in the casual ■■■ sort of thing, I fall for people and attach too easily. I realise this puts me in a true minority group among males my age, but so be it. I only tend to sleep with people that I actually like and have a connection with. Otherwise, I don’t see the point.
I’ve been using the internet to meet people in various forms for over 10 years, so the idea behind online dating holds no great problems for me over and above any other way of meeting women. If i’m going to be pro-active about it, rather than just hoping to stumble across somebody in everyday life, then I don’t see many other options. I’ve had zero success over the years with bars and clubs, and I can’t see me finding her in Tesco’s at 6am, after a nightshift.
Basic things, i’ve learned so far about online dating:
- It’s incredibly shallow, based mostly on looks, and otherwise decent sounding people will discriminate against you if you are short, or have no hair, simply because they can.
- 9 out of 10 people won’t reply to your messages (Women, probably get dozens of messages each day, they simply haven’t time to reply to them all, so you have to be something special) It’s a numbers game, fire off as many messages as you can, and don’t spend a large amount of time on any particular one.
- A lot of the people that reply to the first few messages, will stop replying after a while for no apparent reason.
- Some people you arrange to meet will simply not turn up, seemingly disappear off the face of the earth, then still appear to be using the dating site.
- Most people lie on their profiles, to some degree. It’s a sales advert, and best taken with a large pinch of salt.
The best advice is to exchange a couple of messages, and then try and pin them down to meeting up as soon as possible, to see if there is actually any ‘chemistry’ there. As no amount of pictures or long emails exchanged can ever substitute for that. The sooner you meet them and find out, the less time wasted for everybody. This is of course the whole point, to actually meet people. Unfortunately, it seems a lot of people (especially the younger girls) just use it as an ego massage, and have no intention of ever actually following through.
I find the whole ‘dating’ concept in itself very American and difficult to stomach I.e. seeing several people at the same time, and basically window shopping for the best you can get, but i’m slowly coming round to the idea, because everyone is doing it to each other. Despite my die hard Victorian Engish sensibilities.
hothow44:
do we assume then that this lady is a £100k a year women herself or just wants u to be??!
The more I think about it, the more it appears to be the latter. She is coming out of the forces into civilian life (something we had in common) and the reality of having to actually have to work for your money in the private sector is knocking hard on the front door. I think she would rather have a nice eligible male do the work for her, so she can remain in the style she has become accustomed to.
commonrail:
perhaps im a simpleton...i dont know,easily contented perhaps,i`m just not interested in materialistic stuff.
I’m the same, absolutely no interest in wealth, houses, cars, holidays or anything else. I’m learning to be happy with the simplest of things, and I don’t believe that is a bad thing at all. I know what makes me tick. Just disappointed when other people try and crap all over my apparently stupid little life as if it doesn’t count for anything.
Thanks again, folks
lack of ambition ? & sat in the same office everyday is ambitious ? i may go the same places regularly , but to a degree the route to get there varies & no two days are the same , we all have that it’s great , unlike switch i hardly have exotic places to visit but it’s better than the same view from a desk.
as for online dating , it’s surprising who you meet , i met my current partner 6 years ago online , even more surprising was we’d actually gone out with each other 20 years previous before that !
BanburyDan:
Winseer:
BanburyDan:
My partner really encourages me in my ambition to become a truck driver, even thought it has been very hard us both financially. I was working a fairly well paid job with a big firm, moved half way down the country for what turned out to be empty promises and eventually outright lies. I was assaulted by a work colleague and the managers covered it up, put in grievances etc and they just lied, lied and lied their way out of it. I left to set up my own business, but found it too hard going and it was crushing me in some ways, so I figured it would better to run someone elses vehicle. In the back of my mind this is what I wanted to do since I was a child, I remember drawing pictures of trucks (must have been something like DAF 3300 series??) in primary school. My parents didn’t approve and stopped me doing my HGV years ago. I shouldn’t have listened, as I have never been happier at work. Okay, I will happier when its 5-6 days a week and a good hourly rate, but in terms of the job, I have never been happier. And I would rather be happy than be miserable but pleasing other people. If this woman is more interested in what her mother thinks, kick her to the kerb and find someone who care about YOU, not your job. I can relate to the comment about about latin women, my partner is Portuguese, and is always there, always supportive, caring etc etc. I would avoid swedish women as they are the complete opposite, and I hope to the Gods I never have to drive a scania or volvo!I always thought Volvo and Scania were Swedish girls names? - Mercedes is a girl and a truck after all?!
Still, you’re keeping the faith in your consistency here!Mercedes is after all!
A swedish women with a greek name caused me masses of trouble some years ago…so I guess I’m a bit jaded.
Indeed Mercedes is a girls name, of latin origin I think. And my Portuguese partner has a German name! Spooky huh?
The girl who dumped me in the early 1980’s (see my earlier post on this same thread) eventually married her murderer, and had two kids. He’s Portugeuse, She’s German! 
Her dad had a garage full of Mercedes cars of different age, and her mum was a latino. Maybe it’s all mix-and-match in Europe more than we give them credit?
I kid you not. It’s a small world out there!
Before this other guy showed up, I originally met my first girl in Spain and romanced her in Switzerland where she was working as a ski instructor, and spoke 4 languages already. I hated nightclubs, she hated computers. 'Twas never to be I guess. Reckon she was only interested in me because I was “language number 5” perhaps? 
jessicas dad:
stereotypes…dustman = smelly and dirty
army = rambo’s
office types = nerds
factory workers = brain dead wallys
lorry drivers = fat dirty always eating full breakfasts.
Nowt wrong with a full breakfast
ajt:
Some women are actually turned on by truck drivers.
Yes, I found that out when I parked at the Centre Routier in Rouen 
Only just joined this site, and yours was first post on the list.
Having spent couple of hours reading it all, have to first say, RUN, and RUN FAST.
Coming out of forces, this girl sounds like she wants you to be breadwinner so she can get pregnant (biological clock no doubt clicking away fast), you can provide house, kids, and spending money. Surprised no-one seems to have picked up on that at all. Unless of course this is what you indeed want? However, it is not recommended and you are quite young for kids.
Out of interest, have you had this problem in the past? (the being a “lorry driver” thing?) have ex’s said it was not ambitious, have they complained at all about anything else in this vain? That is where I would start.
It sounds fairly scary that after one month you are even taking this person’s opinion to heart, quite simply what can they offer you? You sound fairly simplistic, which is a good thing, if someone cannot appreciate that, then obviously they are not right for you.
Don’t sell short, aim high and stick to what you believe in, and maybe trust your own judgement on that? Why are you questionning it? What do your friends and family think? do they think it’s unambitious?
To be honest, it sounds like she is spoilt as ■■■■ and just wants a meal ticket. Would look for someone real, who will accept your faults (we all have them), your chosen career, and who doesnt want to be “looked after” like a princess. There are plenty of “normal ones” out there.
You want someone who when you manage to ■■■■ things up still loves the real you, doesnt place value on money to the point of your earnings and your job and who you can just “be with”, end of.
People aim way to high these days in their expectations, she sounds like one of them.
Incidentally, you say you were with your partner for 6 years before? did she have issues with you being a scummy driver? Did she want it all on a plate. It is quite a long period of your life to be with someone, why dont you take something from that period as something must have worked, and whilst you should never compare, it’s useful to sometimes in such circumstances.
Good luck, run fast…!
what a load of bollox if the woman likes you or dis-likes you its gonna be the same if your a trucker or a banker end of the matter
Basic things, i’ve learned so far about online dating:
- It’s incredibly shallow, based mostly on looks, and otherwise decent sounding people will discriminate against you if you are short, or have no hair, simply because they can.
- 9 out of 10 people won’t reply to your messages (Women, probably get dozens of messages each day, they simply haven’t time to reply to them all, so you have to be something special) It’s a numbers game, fire off as many messages as you can, and don’t spend a large amount of time on any particular one.
- A lot of the people that reply to the first few messages, will stop replying after a while for no apparent reason.
- Some people you arrange to meet will simply not turn up, seemingly disappear off the face of the earth, then still appear to be using the dating site.
- Most people lie on their profiles, to some degree. It’s a sales advert, and best taken with a large pinch of salt.
The best advice is to exchange a couple of messages, and then try and pin them down to meeting up as soon as possible, to see if there is actually any ‘chemistry’ there. As no amount of pictures or long emails exchanged can ever substitute for that. The sooner you meet them and find out, the less time wasted for everybody. This is of course the whole point, to actually meet people. Unfortunately, it seems a lot of people (especially the younger girls) just use it as an ego massage, and have no intention of ever actually following through.
Thos points should be published. I know little of nothing about internet dating (and hope I never have to) but in the even - that’s exactly the information I would like to see.
You posted it here, but have you though about sending it to the local paper?
I was once in a position to rise above lorry driver status, i ended up surrounded by people who were my ‘friend’ because of what I was, not who I was, woke up one morning and had a major lifestyle change…back to being myself, a lorry driver and a happy one at that
Even though I’m a lorry driver, that doesn’t mean I have a lack of ambition, I moved half way around the world, I write for magazines on both sides of the Atlantic, I have a weekly 5min guest slot on a trucking radio show and I have a smile on my face which is worth its weight in gold 
My Father was a lorry driver all of his working life.I always said I’m going to be a lorry driver.He used to say get a job in a bank,a job for life.In those days it was but that changed.Needless to say I went lorry driving before I was 21.
As for the woman they accept you for what you are not what you do for a living.
I think you should do what makes you happy, and if you meet someone that cares about you then they will want that for you, whatever job you do. I was an electronic wireman in my late teens and was offered this and that but driving was what I wanted to do and I wouldn’t change it for the world. I don’t think this has anything to do with age either. My mate from TNT a fellow trunk driver has gone on to earn 80k at HSBC, he is working 60-70 hour weeks but misses driving trucks.Sorry to hear about this happening to you mate but keep at it, she’ll turn up when you least expect it. Lastly, I find truck drivers to have better all round intelligence than most people.
Phil
If the purpose of this thread is Goosey’s quest for companionship my advice is to pick the one you find the best looking, on the outside women are all different, on the inside they’re all the same…[zb]ing nutcases 
I can see where you are coming from Wild Goose, as a lad I use to like going in the truck with my father, and in thoughts days there was no problem doing that with H&S rules or problems with insurance companies. I by accident ended up LGV driving for 17 years until I learnt there was life away from trucks, but I must admit I somethimes miss it. The trouble is today the young want it all tomorrow, take my eldest son, started his first job after university as a civil enginner in the UK £23,000 a year. After 12 months asked for a pay rise, didnt get due to the company laying off staff in other area’s so he moved to Holland and started a new job on £40,000 euro’s. He’s been there 12 months and has just got a rise to £46,000 euro’s plus got a bonus of £6000 euro’s for 1 month in his new position. This weekend he flew into Bristol to buy his mother and me a birthday meal and was moaning that his girlfriend starts her 1st job after her law degree on £47,000 euro’s and told her new employer she doesn’t want to start work until May 2012. Yep its a different age nowadays, they want 4 foreign holidays a year plus BMW cars and all the other toys that we couldn’t afford. Do yourself a favour wild goose give up the trucks and move on if you are young enough to do something more rewarding.
I used to think I was being a bit unambitious by being a truck driver so I took up selling and racing motorbikes.
After five years hard slog and a coked up plug on the 2008 Dawn2Dusk Enduro, I realised that I probably should put more energy into being a first rate driver rather than a tenth rate bike racer.
I can’t say that I’m first rate but I’m happy in my work my pay is fair and I feel appreciated. To that end I feel proud that I do a ‘real’ job and I certainly don’t feel looked down upon by anyone.
As for dating… I know it sounds old fashioned but try taking up some other intrests and hobbies. Circuit training in the gym for example that helped me extend my circle of friends when I left the Navy.
Good luck,
W
Dave77erf:
A lot of good coments been put on here but I think it’s sad that we are not recognised as a proffesion I’ve had somebody say to me in the past don’t you wish you had learnt a trade when you left school which really gets me rattled driving is all I ever wanted to do since being a small lad going on trips with my dad it’s been said many of times with out us this country would come to a standstill but at the end off the day I do this job because it makes me happy
It’s fine that you are happy in what you do, but don’t kid yourself that lorry driving is in any way a ‘profession’. To be a professional takes years of study and training - your doctor is a professional as is the architect who designed your house. A job that takes two weeks to learn is just not in the same league.
What’s the problem? You are only 26 man, there is plenty of time to find the right person. You are just starting out in life and you just don’t know what’s around the corner.
I love doing the trucking thing and don’t care what anyone thinks of it. People are, and always have been shallow. Not bothering with someone because of their job is ridiculous. When I was in the army people thought we were thick, only doing it because we couldn’t get a “proper” job, despite operating millions of pounds worth of kit and looking after 20 to 30 men. Now they are all thought of as heroes and rightly so.
Trust me you will find someone who wants you for you, and probably when you least expect it.
gearjammer74:
what a load of bollox if the woman likes you or dis-likes you its gonna be the same if your a trucker or a banker end of the matter
Ahem, I will take a trucker over a banker anyday
Speaking as the partner of a trucker, he was a shelf stacker when we met, he moved onto being a FLT driver and then a shunter, but he wasn’t happy where he was, and it was having an affect on us (I was getting the brunt of his bad days), I did all I could during his HGV licences getting, testing him on the theaory book, things like that, knowing that this was what he wanted to do.
He’s a lot happier now he’s a truckie, doing what he wanted to do for a long time, and a happy chappy makes for a happy me (except for when he’s yelling at me on the phone cos google maps only shows me where a layby is, doesn’t show me that all the other drivers in the area found it before him ).
I don’t care if being a driver is seen as lacking in ambition or whatever, I would rather he did something that he liked, that brings some money in and brings him home with a smile on his face. Plus, when he’s out tramping, I get no snoring, a bed to myself and total control of the remote and XBox
I would not ever want to work under the same roof everyday. I go here and there every day and if I dont like it ,IM gone in 20 minutes.We are in charge of many £1000 s worth of kit of course we should be paid more ,but that wont happen any time soon.I am quite happy on my way to work,I would not have said that when I worked in a bakery.