On a trip from Oporto to Penrith,it has gone missing on route,if anyone spots it please contact me asap,a reward is on offer for Connie the cone,that has been with me for 12 long years.
I will enclose a brief description,it was about two and half feet high,with quite distinguishing markings of a black base,quite solid,and white stripes half way down the side.
I have phoned the Highways Agency traffic cone line,to see if they have spotted poor old Connie all alone at the side of the road.The Govenment offered me support,and counseling at this loss i have suffered,the insurance will not pay out too.
I may pm Smashed Crab Face or Rob K,Goaty to see if they have seen it on the road.It may have gone overboard on the ferry,so Raymundo may spot it bobbing in the Channel.The Doctor has prescribed some Valium to calm me down a bit.
Plenty of unattached cones knocking about,Toby.Get yourself a new one and don’t look back.Better still,find a better doctor-you are waaay beyond the valium stage. 
Poor old Connie,it was a one off! 
I saw about 3000 of them touting for business along the M62 you may be able to pick one up to ease you pain and help you get over your loss
Was Connie a resting place for when you need to drop the kids off and sling?
It does take a while to wear a cone in so you can crap in comfort behind a bush 
toby1234abc:
Poor old Connie,it was a one off!
Sounds like it may have involved one off the wrist, several times.
toby1234abc:
Poor old Connie,it was a one off!
saw a cone of this description suspiciously stood looking menacing on inside lane of M25. Thought it was involved with a hijack gang so didnt stop and flicked it over the embankment and its now probably a winter refuge for a hibernating hedgehog.
Toby have you been sniffing a cats ring piece again?
switchlogic:
Toby have you been sniffing a cats ring piece again?
I remember that post (!) 
Coffeeholic:
switchlogic:
Toby have you been sniffing a cats ring piece again?I remember that post (!)
Coffeeholic:
switchlogic:
Toby have you been sniffing a cats ring piece again?I remember that post (!)
I’ve been waiting for a sufficiently random post from him so I could use it and BOOM he delivered.
Toby have you checked on the top of your head.
switchlogic:
I’ve been waiting for a sufficiently random post from him so I could use it and BOOM he delivered.
Toby’s posts are predictably random.Or are they randomly predictable? 
Either way,you don’t have to wait long.Bless him
switchlogic:
Coffeeholic:
switchlogic:
Toby have you been sniffing a cats ring piece again?I remember that post (!)
I’ve been waiting for a sufficiently random post from him so I could use it and BOOM he delivered.
Good things come to those who wait. 
toby1234abc:
On a trip from Oporto to Penrith,it has gone missing on route,if anyone spots it please contact me asap,a reward is on offer for Connie the cone,that has been with me for 12 long years.
I will enclose a brief description,it was about two and half feet high,with quite distinguishing markings of a black base,quite solid,and white stripes half way down the side.
I have phoned the Highways Agency traffic cone line,to see if they have spotted poor old Connie all alone at the side of the road.The Govenment offered me support,and counseling at this loss i have suffered,the insurance will not pay out too.
I may pm Smashed Crab Face or Rob K,Goaty to see if they have seen it on the road.It may have gone overboard on the ferry,so Raymundo may spot it bobbing in the Channel.The Doctor has prescribed some Valium to calm me down a bit.
Do you want one of these to replace it?
Was that you broke down by Tebay tonight Highwayman or another Womble?
Not guilty, I didn’t start till 10 pm. 
The Highway Man:
Not guilty, I didn’t start till 10 pm.
Ah,this was Archers time…between 7-7.15 southbound just above 38…He was on the grass and I expect you to fully take the ■■■■.
I have been asked to babysit for the neighbours 18 cats,so a major sniffing fest is on the cards. 
Can you hide a ■■■■■ in the side lockers on the ferry to europe? 