ben wid my girl for 3 years we were engaged and also got 2 kids 1 girl age 3 (before any1 ask she my step daughter but took her on as my own as real dad didnt want 2 know) we also have a son who 10 months old we had big fight 3 weeks ago n i so angry i ended it but i wish i never said it now so wont take me bk n it driving me crazy she said she had enough n wants be on her own. not first time it happened but this time think she means it she told me she wants al my stuff gone which it has n i want her bk but knowing wot 2 do i got so bad even my doc toldme im depressed n i need 2 see sum1 im only 23 n she 20 help please
Hi Sam,
Well done on asking for advice and going to see your G.P. in general we blokes mostly
bottle it up.
I think one of the most important things is to avoid anymore confrontation with your
partner, If you are still talking try offering to look after the kids, so she can have some
free time. Her life must be pretty tough with a toddler and a baby to take care of.
Also Sam try and be honest with yourself have you got the strength to make it work
because as a young mum this is what she needs to see from you.
I am typing this and wondering if I should post it or not, but It sounds like your having a
hard time at the moment. The truth is mate there is no easy fix and lots of us have failed
in relationships, it takes a lot of hard work and is one of the biggest challenges life will
throw your way.
I wish you good luck Sam and hope things turn out ok.
Cheers Paul
Hi Sam as those before me have posted,try to get a friend of you both to help mediate,its hard being a parent mate , and the young lady and yourself are not alone as this problem is one that happens to many of us as well. also listen to your doc ask him /her what the next step, is, HOPE that this is of use, all the best to you all ,pete,
Been there chap married for 14yrs and it all went tights up mind we had a few rocky patches when the kids came along.
1st thing dont blame ANYONE for whats happening.
It could be a number of things for reasons you shouldnt put on here.
Women and Men yes MEN do suffer with post natel depression as you say you have a 10mth old son.
Silly things set you or her off and the past can get dragged up and things said.
When you see your GP be honest about everything your feelings etc about the whole situation and what you have argued about it’ll give them a better picture, Dont be embarressed I’ve yet to meet a Dr that hasnt seen or talked about most things in life, The most trivial of things can start an argument between you. My x insisted that the tea spoons went in a particular direction in the draw that used to get my back up but then there were things that I did that got her going .
Hope you can work it out mate dont for get to get a phone number of someone you can call if your gettin wound up about it,
It’s better to talk than stew and get wound up in things
Good luck
Nick
It’ll get better mate you’ll start talking about it then you wont shut up
Even if your talking to someone who aint listening 100% helps.
Some people say god man shake out of it and get on but it aint always that easy for some of us.
you’ll get it sorted
You could write a simple letter to your girl, just telling her how much you love her and the children and that you would like the two of you to try to work it out.
Then get a counselling or workshop session sorted at a time you know will work for your lady and ask her to join you. We get extra coaching for our driving and exams etc., so it makes sense to get some extra help for our most important relationships too.
Don’t give up, get some professional support and let us know how you get on.
Just because you’re fit now, doesn’t mean you always will be. And trust me, the bigger balls are invariably to be found on the man who fronts up and admits it.
Lucy:
Just because you’re fit now, doesn’t mean you always will be. And trust me, the bigger balls are invariably to be found on the man who fronts up and admits it.
It has got nothing to do with being fit, Lucy … but all that has happened is he has been dumped. For crying out loud, I am sure we have all been dumped at some time in our life yet who has had sodding councelling for it?? Jeez, he is 23 … he should be out there sowing his bloody oats anyway.
There are no kids involved and the only injury is to his bloody pride!!! GROW UP, MAN!!!
I can remember a time when the replies on this site would have been more in liking with good old fashioned blokey replies, as in
“She was taking it large style up the back doors with me last night”
or
“She was covered in me and my mates DNA samples last night”
or
“She has had more satisfying surgical smears then ■■■ with you fella”
He does indeed, and as someone who has been through the heartache that a breakup involving kids can cause, I can assure you that it isn’t a matter of getting balls. It’s a major known trigger of Clinical Depression, as any GP will tell you, and Clinical Depression is an illness with an organic basis. That level of stress can bring on a chemical imbalance, which is what the medication is there to correct. Counselling then helps you pull out of it.
Since I take an anti-depressant to deal with mood swings caused by the holes in my brain, I suppose I just need to grow up and get over it as well… Because if an organic chemical imbalance can be corrected by willpower alone, presumably the emotional and cognitive difficulties caused by MS can be as well, eh?
Ps. I suppose the day I had to break the door down to rescue my mother after she took an overdose thanks to Clinical Depression triggered by a nasty split involving children would have been better dealt with using a stern lecture rather than an ambulance as well, yeah?
but then there were things that I did that got her going 
.
but come on all this at the age he is! No wonder this country has gone to the dogs no balls anymore (don’t mean you Lucy 
)
