Funny country 'n' western song titles

They don’t have to be real, just in the ‘spirit’ of country songs.
ie; ‘You’re the reason our kids are so ugly’, and ‘I knew you loved me when you took the pillow off my face’.
The best one gets a 10 gallon hat and boots (by email, of course).

And here’s that weepie classic…

Get Your Tongue Outta My Mouth 'Cause I’m Kissing You Goodbye

“Now that you have run over the dog, who is gonna love you”

Get Off the Table, Mabel (The Two Dollars is for the Beer)

If I’d Killed You When I Wanted To, I’d be Out of Jail By Now

If The Phone Doesn’t Ring, It’s Me

If You Don’t Leave Me, I’ll Find Someone Who Will

My John Deere Was Breaking Your Field, While Your Dear John Was Breaking My Heart

ok I cheated :open_mouth: :open_mouth: click here

Mr B&Q you left me to DIY when you knew I wanted love

My Ex-Wife Drove Me to Drink (I Haven’t Thanked Her Yet!)