Few more jokes

What’s black and screams?

Stevie Wonder answering the iron.

Have youy seen Stevie Wonders new girlfriend?

Neither has he.

2 dyslexics rush into a bank with guns and shout:
"Air in the hands motherstickers, this is a [zb] up

Murphy calls to see his mate Paddy who has a broken leg. Paddy says, me feet are freeing mate, could you nip upstairs & get me slippers? No Bother he says & runs upstairs, & there are Paddy’s two stunning 19 year old twin daughters sat on their bed. “Hello der girls, ur dad sent me up here the shag ya both”. “■■■■ off ya liar” they said, “I’ll prove it” says murphy. So he shouts down the staris, “both of them Pat”? “Course, what the use of ■■■■■■■ one of them”

auto censor dodge removed…Denis F

That last one bubsy is my favourite joke ever!!!11 :smiley: , shame its edited :frowning:

Would you believe it mate still edited in the PM

the first zb is the f word, and the second zb is the f word with ing on the end :wink:

Paddy applies for a job at the stables.
“Can you shoe a horse?” asks the stablemaster. Paddy thinks about it, then replies:

“No, but I once told a donkey to F off.”

Just after a woman gives birth to her baby, the doctor asks if she wants the good news or the bad news.
“The bad news, doctor”, replies the mother.
“It’s ginger”, says the doctor
“So what’s the good news?!”
“It’s dead.”

A guy goes to the supermarket and notices a beautiful woman wave at
him and say hello.

He’s rather taken aback, because he can’t place where he knows her
from.So he says, “Do you know me?”

To which she replies,“I think you’re the father of one of my kids.”

Now his mind travels back to the only time he has ever
been unfaithful to
his wife and says,“My God, are you the stripper from my stag
party that I made love to on the pool table with all my pals
watching,while your partner whipped my ■■■■ with wet celery■■?”

She looks into his eyes and calmly says, “No, I’m your son’s
math teacher.”