Picture this. I am in Lewes, at a garden centre doing a delivery. I jump into the back and attempt to pull the pallet towords the door so the forklift driver was able to get it (In the middle of the van). The pallet was fully loaded and weighed a bit, and was also the heaviest one in the back. Whilst i was bending over i heard a rip. I then heard laughter coming from behind so i looked round to see the forklift driver laughing his head off. The wind then blew the side of the van and i felt a cold breeze down below. Upon inspection i can see that i had ripped my trousers from the ■■■ crack right round to the front. I felt such a ■■■ and just wanted the ground to take me away.
Ahhhh, that ripping sound ! Did you have spare pants with you ■■ I had an accident in similar fashion once but I ripped a lot more than my pants and ended up in hospital ! At the scene I went through 3 pairs of pants as they got covered in blood and even had to take 2 pairs of pants off the guy I was delivering to !!! I might pluck up the courage to post a thread on what was a bit embarrassing at the time (and still is).
Kerbdog:
Ahhhh, that ripping sound ! Did you have spare pants with you ■■ I had an accident in similar fashion once but I ripped a lot more than my pants and ended up in hospital ! At the scene I went through 3 pairs of pants as they got covered in blood and even had to take 2 pairs of pants off the guy I was delivering to !!! I might pluck up the courage to post a thread on what was a bit embarrassing at the time (and still is).
Hahaha I was in Lewes today as well as it happens.
I was once running towards my cab with the door already open so I was literally going to run up the steps and jump straight in, I basically missed my footing but I already had both hands on the climbing rail and just hung there holding onto the rail lol!!! Gave everyone smoking outside a right laugh.
I once tried to jump up onto a wet tail lift with trainers on,of course i slipped,my whole 18 odd stone landed on my shin on the edge of the lift,i rolled around the floor in agony,it was so so sore,i had chipped my shin bone,it felt like id broken it,i can feel it now thinking about it,needless to say i never wore trainers again.Worst bit was it was in front of about 8 warehouse guys.
I also remember doing a delivery to a shop one morning early and i had an eye for the cute assistant manager,her and her staff were doing alot of giggling at me and i wondered what was up,i finished the delivery and asked what it was and they laughed out loud and wouldnt tell me,so i went about half an hour away and couldnt work it out,about to do 2nd delivery the couriosity got the better of me and i phoned said girl at 1st place,she said who dresses you in the morning,i said why,she said look down,i did and noticed my t shirt was inside out,we still laugh about it 7 years later,but i was red on the phone.
Yep, also ripped a few pairs of pants, not usually all the way around the arse though, so can usually hide it - a big coat comes in handy at times
Just the other day though, I had been driving the Ovlov, got out of that into the Merc, did a few bits and bobs, back in the yard, goes to climb out of the Merc, missed the steps and fell to the deck - it’s a megaspace too so a bloody long way to fall, aparantly it’s common after getting out of the volvo because the steps stick out further?? Still not noticed, but the lads in our yard - including a delivery from another company - were ■■■■■■■ themselves laughing
Delivery in central London next to harrods , all the yummy mummy’s and nannies on the school run , and delivering nespesso coffe into a hatch in the street with the manager on a chair underneath, and my new £5 asda jeans let go and I felt a rush of cold air, I could hear the muffled shouts of where are you from the hatch while I was back in the cab changing into a pair of hi viz trousers , a sweaty day followed !!!
I once walked straight off the side of a flat trailer backwards when re-arranging the load, took the wind out of me as I thankfully landed on soft grass which I was parked beside, I laid there stunned and winded for a few moments before poking my head up and looking around to see if anyone saw my most stupid fall
The laughter from the houses opposite suggest I did not get away with it and spent the next 20mins feeling a right prat.
Nothing’s worse than the total humiliation over the years of many a driver who’s decided to have a quick crafty ■■■■ around the side of a motor, only to find he had the squirts and didn’t realise it.
There are many scenarios for accidentally ■■■■■■■■ yourself, but being at work walking around in the yard isn’t the best place to do it!
I was once driving a transit van which, although it was only parcels, had a cage in the back and an alarm and immobiliser button which you had to press within a certain time limit after starting the vehicle.
On this day, I forgot to press the button… I got onto the roundabout at junction 24 when the vehicle switched off, all alarms sounded and the lights were flashing
The only way to switch it off and reset the system, was to climb in the back and press a button for 30 seconds. So in the middle of the roundabout, drawing more attention to myself than an alien landing, I got out, and in my rush to get in the back, caught my trousers on the cage in the back and ripped half the bum off them! I just wanted the Earth to swallow me up! Never forgot to press the button again though
This happened to me when I used to work in a supermarket. No-one around to hear it but no spare trousers made the shift a long-un. Stacking the lower shelves was something of a challenge.
just in case aye!
