Two eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the bottom of the boat.
Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can’t have your kayak and heat it too.
same Eskimo stuck his ■■■ out of his Igloo and got a chap on it 
see you in Bullys 
An Eskimo was on a self-drive holiday touring the UK.
Whilst up in the Brecon Beacons the oil light came on in his rented car.
He pulled over and using his mobile called out the RAC.
The guy who arrived looked underneath and spotting a pool of oil said :-
“It looks like you’ve blown a seal boyo”
The Eskimo replyed :-
“Well you lot shag sheep so what’s the big deal?”
Sorry Dave - Tin hat on etc.
Last one was the best 
Eskimo run over by a steam roller.
He was chuffed to bits.
Sorry.
A pheasant was standing in a field chatting to a bull. “I would love to be able to get to the top of that tree”, sighed the pheasant, “but I haven’t got the energy”
“Well, why don’t you nibble on some of my droppings?” replied the bull. “They’re packed with nutrients.”
The pheasant pecked at a lump of dung and found that it actually gave him enough strength to reach the first branch of the tree.
The next day, after eating some more dung, he reached the second branch, And so on. Finally, after a fortnight, there he was proudly perched at the top of the tree.
he was spotted by a farmer though who dashed into the farmhouse, emerged with a shotgun, and shot the pheasant right out of the tree.
The Moral of the Story: ■■■■■■■■ might get you to the top, but it won’t keep you there