In my part of the world(Costa Blanca)last week a truck driver was stopped and discovered to be 10 times over the limit at 159mg/l lt against a legal 15.Is this a recrd?Probably not.For the redord he was belorussian.Other drivers on the motorway were concerned by his manner of driving.The Guardia had to ask another passing truck driver to park his lorry tidily on the hard shoulder!
Other drivers on the motorway were concerned by his manner of driving.
They couldn’t work out why he was driving so well!
I once pulled up to the traffic lightsin fish ponds
on my Kawasaki kh400 &
Then proceeded to end up in a pile
On floor with my pride & joy on
Top of me , luckily my mates on there
Bikes were still sober as they didn’t think
Riding a motorbike after far to much
Cider was a good idea , so picked me
And bike up off floor
My stepdad thought I’d killed someone
As when he walked out door to go
To work he saw my ford Capri smashed in
Front end , I’d hit a concrete flower pot at
Tony’s cafe gonerby hill foot ( too much cider )
He also had to walk round alma park looking
For my ford cortina that he eventually
Found in gateway at top of kenilworth
Round with drivers door wide open ( abandoned after drinking too much cider
After leaving dirty duck at wolsthorpe
With mates in cortina I decided it would be fun to
Crazy speed in snow & ended up in
Ditch ( cider)
Much to the amusement of my mates
I paid some 60 yr old women on city
Road in Bristol loads of money for me to
Get kicked out by her for falling to sleep
( cider )
, at times life’s been a cider fuelled blurr , I
Have sympathy with driver of lorry
Reading that I think it is still a blur-at least it is for us.
Carry on being dozy Dozy life wouldn’t be the same.
not a truck driver,but a mate of mine still refuses to give up drink driving 
parks his land rover on the pub car park,drinks 5 or 6 pints of Doombar,then drives off home about half a mile away 
we’ve told him,he ignores our advice…and i’m reluctant to grass him up to the OB…but it is infuriating.
carryfast-yeti:
not a truck driver,but a mate of mine still refuses to give up drink driving
we’ve told him,he ignores our advice…and i’m reluctant to grass him up to the OB…but it is infuriating.
Hes playing Russian Roulette: with his licence and someone elses life.
Youre playing Russian Roulette: with your conscience and someone elses life.
Phone the police this morning when he is sober and can`t be prosecuted. Phone him and tell him the police have been tipped off.
No risk to him, so long as he stays sober when driving. You arent trying to get him prosecuted, youre trying to get him to behave responsibly.
Would that work?
Franglais:
carryfast-yeti:
not a truck driver,but a mate of mine still refuses to give up drink driving
we’ve told him,he ignores our advice…and i’m reluctant to grass him up to the OB…but it is infuriating.He
s playing Russian Roulette: with his licence and someone elses life.
Youre playing Russian Roulette: with your conscience and someone elses life.Phone the police this morning when he is sober and can`t be prosecuted. Phone him and tell him the police have been tipped off.
No risk to him, so long as he stays sober when driving. You aren
t trying to get him prosecuted, youre trying to get him to behave responsibly.
Would that work?
i doubt it…he’s a stubborn old geezer.his best mate has told him,he still does it.he’s 67yo and his life would be in ruins if he got bagged.i will have a word with his son as a last resort i think.
carryfast-yeti:
Franglais:
carryfast-yeti:
not a truck driver,but a mate of mine still refuses to give up drink driving
we’ve told him,he ignores our advice…and i’m reluctant to grass him up to the OB…but it is infuriating.He
s playing Russian Roulette: with his licence and someone elses life.
Youre playing Russian Roulette: with your conscience and someone elses life.Phone the police this morning when he is sober and can`t be prosecuted. Phone him and tell him the police have been tipped off.
No risk to him, so long as he stays sober when driving. You aren
t trying to get him prosecuted, youre trying to get him to behave responsibly.
Would that work?i doubt it…he’s a stubborn old geezer.his best mate has told him,he still does it.he’s 67yo and his life would be in ruins if he got bagged.i will have a word with his son as a last resort i think.
So long as he thinks he has a good chance of “getting away with it” he probably will keep on then?
Tell the cops, tell him and everyone that the cops know, let him know the chances of “getting away with it” have shortened. Help him do the right thing before he gets bagged.
As I said, it isnt you trying to get him nicked, its you trying to prevent a driving ban, or worse.
That`s me done.
dozy:
I once pulled up to the traffic lightsin fish ponds
on my Kawasaki kh400 &
Then proceeded to end up in a pile
On floor with my pride & joy on
Top of me , luckily my mates on there
Bikes were still sober as they didn’t think
Riding a motorbike after far to much
Cider was a good idea , so picked me
And bike up off floor
My stepdad thought I’d killed someone
As when he walked out door to go
To work he saw my ford Capri smashed in
Front end , I’d hit a concrete flower pot at
Tony’s cafe gonerby hill foot ( too much cider )
He also had to walk round alma park looking
For my ford cortina that he eventually
Found in gateway at top of kenilworth
Round with drivers door wide open ( abandoned after drinking too much cider
After leaving dirty duck at wolsthorpe
With mates in cortina I decided it would be fun to
Crazy speed in snow & ended up in
Ditch ( cider)
Much to the amusement of my mates
I paid some 60 yr old women on city
Road in Bristol loads of money for me to
Get kicked out by her for falling to sleep
( cider )
, at times life’s been a cider fuelled blurr , I
Have sympathy with driver of lorry
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
how
much
cider would
you need
to drink
before
being capable
of
posting
pish like this ta…
dozy:
I once pulled up to the traffic lightsin fish ponds
on my Kawasaki kh400 &
Then proceeded to end up in a pile
On floor with my pride & joy on
Top of me , luckily my mates on there
Bikes were still sober as they didn’t think
Riding a motorbike after far to much
Cider was a good idea , so picked me
And bike up off floor
My stepdad thought I’d killed someone
As when he walked out door to go
To work he saw my ford Capri smashed in
Front end , I’d hit a concrete flower pot at
Tony’s cafe gonerby hill foot ( too much cider )
He also had to walk round alma park looking
For my ford cortina that he eventually
Found in gateway at top of kenilworth
Round with drivers door wide open ( abandoned after drinking too much cider
After leaving dirty duck at wolsthorpe
With mates in cortina I decided it would be fun to
Crazy speed in snow & ended up in
Ditch ( cider)
Much to the amusement of my mates
I paid some 60 yr old women on city
Road in Bristol loads of money for me to
Get kicked out by her for falling to sleep
( cider )
, at times life’s been a cider fuelled blurr , I
Have sympathy with driver of lorry
doze mate , seriously 
…
That ridiculousy bizarre non grammatical style of posting just scrambles your brain when attempting to decipher it 
Do us all a favour mate ffs, and knock it on the head eh? 
carryfast-yeti:
Franglais:
carryfast-yeti:
not a truck driver,but a mate of mine still refuses to give up drink driving
we’ve told him,he ignores our advice…and i’m reluctant to grass him up to the OB…but it is infuriating.He
s playing Russian Roulette: with his licence and someone elses life.
Youre playing Russian Roulette: with your conscience and someone elses life.Phone the police this morning when he is sober and can`t be prosecuted. Phone him and tell him the police have been tipped off.
No risk to him, so long as he stays sober when driving. You aren
t trying to get him prosecuted, youre trying to get him to behave responsibly.
Would that work?i doubt it…he’s a stubborn old geezer.his best mate has told him,he still does it.he’s 67yo and his life would be in ruins if he got bagged.i will have a word with his son as a last resort i think.
Many moons ago (early 80s) had one bloke who used to come into my local from work, down about 6/7 pints and then drive home.
He wouldn’t get the message so one night I removed his car keys from the bar. Wouldn’t give them back and he stormed out, into a taxi and went home. I left the keys with the landlord.
Following evening, fella comes back, gets his keys and starts drinking again. Same thing, I took the keys. (he knew who had them).
He went home in a taxi again.
3rd evening he came in, got the keys and had an orange juice. A converted man that finally thanked me for saving him/others.
He’s now in his 80s and I see him now and again and he still thanks me for taking his keys away.
So there’s hope for your matey yet.
Reading this thread has reminded me of an old joke.
The police are watching a country pub because they know the drinkers in there are all gonna drive home over the limit. Sure enough, about half ten, the first guy staggers out the door. He can barely walk, staggering to the car park and trying to get into his car. The coppers think they’ve hit the jackpot with this one so they watch him. He starts the car, weaves round the car park narrowly missing the other cars before pulling onto the main road. The coppers follow him for 100 yards or so before turning on their lights and stopping the car. The coppers invite the driver to sit in the back of their car whilst they question him. Very compliant the driver answers all their questions until finally the coppers ask him what his occupation is. “Professional decoy” he replies.
Of course, when I tell this in an rdc waiting room, it actually happened because I’m the driver of course.
Nite Owl:
Reading this thread has reminded me of an old joke.The police are watching a country pub because they know the drinkers in there are all gonna drive home over the limit. Sure enough, about half ten, the first guy staggers out the door. He can barely walk, staggering to the car park and trying to get into his car. The coppers think they’ve hit the jackpot with this one so they watch him. He starts the car, weaves round the car park narrowly missing the other cars before pulling onto the main road. The coppers follow him for 100 yards or so before turning on their lights and stopping the car. The coppers invite the driver to sit in the back of their car whilst they question him. Very compliant the driver answers all their questions until finally the coppers ask him what his occupation is. “Professional decoy” he replies.
Of course, when I tell this in an rdc waiting room, it actually happened because I’m the driver of course.
Another oldie:
Cops are on a public promotional exercise: they are trying to improve their image,and help relationships with motorists.
Driving along, they tuck in behind a car. Just under the speed limit, perfect road positioning, anticipating all hazards…exemplary driving.
The patrol car flashes its blues and pulls him over. "Sorry to trouble you sir, but we wish to compliment you on your driving. Any comments about how to achieve such a high level of driving?" "Yeesh, officer. You gotta be careful when youve `ad a few!"
sorry
dozy:
I once pulled up to the traffic lightsin fish ponds
on my Kawasaki kh400 &
Then proceeded to end up in a pile
On floor with my pride & joy on
Top of me , luckily my mates on there
Bikes were still sober as they didn’t think
Riding a motorbike after far to much
Cider was a good idea , so picked me
And bike up off floor
My stepdad thought I’d killed someone
As when he walked out door to go
To work he saw my ford Capri smashed in
Front end , I’d hit a concrete flower pot at
Tony’s cafe gonerby hill foot ( too much cider )
He also had to walk round alma park looking
For my ford cortina that he eventually
Found in gateway at top of kenilworth
Round with drivers door wide open ( abandoned after drinking too much cider
After leaving dirty duck at wolsthorpe
With mates in cortina I decided it would be fun to
Crazy speed in snow & ended up in
Ditch ( cider)
Much to the amusement of my mates
I paid some 60 yr old women on city
Road in Bristol loads of money for me to
Get kicked out by her for falling to sleep
( cider )
, at times life’s been a cider fuelled blurr , I
Have sympathy with driver of lorry
What is up with dozys post these days? Did he just get a cry phone 11■■ Not able to use word wrap?? Thinks he’s a poet now■■? Used to enjoy (slight exaggeration perhaps) his tales of woe wondering if he’d ever get to have his steak dinner or catch one of the other blokes shagging his missus… but this even by his standards is pure drival…