to start here my attempt
we’ve had bigger in here drive.
mind they all got stuck too!
Where exactly do you want this tunnel?
Diwedd Parth on the sign means “DUCK!”
I’m having a bad day, but I can see the light at the end of tunnel!!!
He’d have got it in, if it had hair round it! 
"Typical van driver , – any hole will do ! " 
[zb] satnav said it were up here.
The auto censor dodge wasn’t necessary, cos we could still tell what you meant if you hadn’t tried the dodge.
That proves its not big enough for Jeremy Clarksons head to get through