This has probably been posted before, but I am very easily amused 
A Northern Territory farm hand (an Aboriginal) radios back to the farm manager. “Boss, I gotta helluva problem here. I hit a pig with the truck. The pig’s ok, but he’s stuck in the bullbars at the front of my truck and is wriggling and squealing so much I can’t get him out.” The manager says, “Ok, there’s a .303 rifle behind the seat. Take it, shoot the pig in the head and you’ll be able to remove him.” Five minutes later the farm hand calls back, “I did what you said boss. Took the 303, shot the pig in the head and removed him from the bull-bars. No problem with that, but I still can’t go on”. “Now what’s the problem?” raged the Manager. “Well boss, it’s his motor-bike. The flashing blue light is stuck under the right-front wheel arch. Hello, Hello, You there Boss?”
