I bet some of you have some great funnies to tell the newbies so they can learn, I’ve seen some and done some, one that sticks in my head and was funny to watch the drivers face, we had to swap trailers he was taking my loaded one to london and I was to load his empty flat and trundle back to the yardso i dropped my one where it was being loaded went out to him blah blah so he gets out to drop his trailer ( slight incline) this road not dead flat, what does he do first …yep you got it he pulled the pin, well theres me winding the legs like mad, as it’s sliding off the fifth wheel legs hit the deck but they got wheels on too, well the suzies by now are at their limit ( bout a mile long )trailer finally stops when the red one snaps, good job I didn’t park my unit behind the dumb ■■■, so there ya go newbies always take the suzies off first and apply the brake, luckily nobody hurt and I got the legs down far enough so I could still get under it, see it happen the other way too driver dropping a trailer gets in to pull off the trailer… and forgot to pull the pin on the fifth wheel so gets out to pull it… what had he forgot.yup the hand brake… so off goes the unit with a portly bloke chasing it didn’t manage to stop it before it hit a car further down the yard, but he did manage to get into the cab seconds before it hit as he’d left the door open, …so come on boys lets hear some funnies to chher us up when we’re having a bad day
when id first passed my c+e, id stopped at the bp garage at the a14/a1 roundabout for a pack of cigs, pulled on the pumps, jumped out, into the shop, just handing my money over, queue behind me, looked up as the cashier was counting out my change, and thought, is my truck moving 
…SHEEEEEEEEIT! very very fast sprint out, unlock door, slam parking brake on and wait for heart attack to stop! to this day, im posotive i put the brake on before i jumped out. red faced arent the words when i walked back in for the cigs id thrown in the air 
Mid 90s after filling up at the in-house pump and having a nice chat to a fellow driver…
pull off pump…BANG/CRASH !!.. … I think I’m supposed to take the filler hose out of the tank on the truck, stow it and put the fuel cap on before driving off…
Not long after I passed my test I was working casual for Chris Millers in Preston, we did all flat work aswell as machinery removal. I had delivered a load of aluminium roofing to RNAD coulport and was told to go into Pirrelli’s at Carlisle.
The trailers we used weren’t new by any stretch and still had the wind up parking brakes, well when I got there I reported to the heavy gang foreman and he said the machine I was loading would not e ready to load till the morning and I was to drop my trailer on the car park outside. This carpark was on a bit of a slope, and guess what happened, yes, I had forgotten to wind on the parking brake for the trailer.
I uncoupled the trailer removed all the suzies and wound down the legs and then pulled the 5th wheel and it started rolling of the footplate and rolling down the hill towards the main road outside the factroy.
I have never run so fast in my life, have you ever tried to run and wind up a ratchet at the same time, not easy I tell you. luckilly the trailer had just been in for a service and the brakes had been renewed so it only took a couple of winds on the ratchet before it stopped a bout 6" from the road.
The security guard who had witnessed it was in stitches watching me and it only took 12 hours to get round the lads who gave me stick for weeks.
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I have posted this story on another part of this site but I think it’s worth another mention.
I passed my test in the spring of 89, I did some work on 4 wheeler for a couple of months when a call came from the agency I was with at that time to go to Burtons Biscuits in Cwmbran class 1. I was off like a shot and reported to the T.M who told me to collect the unit from their workshop about a mile away from the factory, off I go and on my arrival a fitter gives me the keys to a bloody big Seddon Atkinson with a twin splitter gearbox, ever driven one of these he says, nope say I no problem he says, I need a trailer from the factory I will show you on the way off we go, on our return he drops the trailer and tells me mine is in the workshop. I reverse tug forward put the plate on wind up the legs then attach the air lines and yes I have forgotten to apply the handbrake and off we go across the yard, me driving from the catwalk heading towards the fuel tank with the fitter screaming pull the ******* red line, I eventually comply with his request and come to a dead stop in a heap tangled up in the susies. I will never forget the howls of laughter from the workshop staff one of which was lying on his back for effect, when I eventually got going I was treated to round of applause.
Fast forward 21 years I get a call from the agency I’m with to go to Burtons Biscuits for an assessment drive, off i go meet the T.M, nice fella go through all the paperwork blah blah, then out for the drive, pick up the trailer (handbrake on) all goes well, all mirrors and two hands on the wheel. On our return I am asked to drop the trailer off, the yard is quite small and the gap I have taken the trailer from has been taken, the only space left will require a blindside reverse, no problem start to go back but i,m a bit tight on the nearside. Then the curse of the biscuit strikes again instead of pulling forward the way I came which would be to the left I go right, the back of the trailer swings out and hits the one to my left, the assessor jumps out to check the damage (superficial) while I sit in the cab with my elbows on the steering wheel and my head in my hands. Bugger 
I was up north once, pulled in for fuel grabbed the black nozel thing stuffed it in the tank glug glug then thought a bloody heavy wiff of petrol round here, then realized something not right, some dozey a**e had put a diesel black nozel on a freekin unleaded pump obviously hadn’t got one of them pretty green ones, luckily I didn’t start the thing, then came the problem with the keyfuels card will it pay for petrol luckily it did, now the next how do i get the bloody stuff out well A guy overheard me and he was a mechanic no probs he said i’ll go fetch a pump and some barels so he did, buggered to know what he was gonna do with petrol and diesel mix I said what you gonna do 200 litres of this stuff, and apparently his heating system at the workshop would burn it, don’t like the sound of that idea but not my problem now, he didi have to ■■■■ my tank dry though, then filled up with diesel and it was ok, just glad i noticed before driving off, otherwise deep do do i’d have been in garge not interested about the colour of the pump handel, bar stewards… boss had a bit of a hissy fit though…so I told him to look on the bright side at least I didn’t ■■■■ it through the engine and cause more expense than a couple of hundred quid of petrol!!