I love my job, I could be home every night or be away all week, just depending how the work falls.
Earlier this week we found out that my bird of 2 years is expecting in september and dunno how it’s gonna affect my work.
She’s never been happy with me being away, but she accepted it because it’s what i’ve done since before we met and it’s paying the brass we need while she’s currently out of work herself.
How do you lot go on with your families? is it accepted? is there much strain? did you have to change your work for the family?
I really can’t see me doing just day work, and it would be a drop in money as well, but if it comes to it then it’ll have to be done, and I really can’t wait for my first young un as well, suppose it’s just what ya have to do!
my little girl is 3 next month and its really horrible being away for at least a week at a time but the mrs understands that the mortgage has to be paid but if i could give it up i would, as they say you should work to live not live to work.
hope all goes well with your new arrival and keep buying the lottery cos thats the only way we’ll be able to give up
If she new the job before she started going out with you she should accept the fact that that is how you earn your living.
If she dosnt then you have to decide which you want her or the job. Just as a matter of interest there are more long distance drivers with ex wives than any other industry.
When I was married to my first wife I was off to Europe doing ships stores. Could be away for weeks and we did fine. Got finished up there and took a local job with a builders merchant, home every night and we were divorced within 6 months.
Perhaps that is not the norm but things can go both ways in this job.
i started tramping 2 years ago when my twin boys were 4 …works ok for us …dont get wrong though id rather be home every night though …but cant afford to be
nah i couldnt do it
i tried but when you get phone call one is ill and off to hospital and youre 200 miles away you feel crap
also just the little things like new words etc
and i was only doing a couple of nights a week away
so i went back to farming, yes hours are silly in harvest but i can get boss to drive combine for 1/2 an hour so we can have a picnic tea nearly every day. wage is down a bit but not really that much
In my honest opinion, it is you that will want to be home, your other half will cope just the same without you as she has up till now…It is hard missing all the growing up that happens while you are at work…first smile, first crawling, first steps, first words etc etc etc…But at the end of the day you need to earn a living and sometimes we have to make sacrifices
I missed my son and daughter growing up, now they have left home I can actually afford to spend more time at home, how ironic is that
My little is one next week and useually away all week expect a massive change in your lifestyle
to say it isn’t easy is an understatment, make sure you have backup from family on both sides and take any help offered from them
jens done an amazing job over the past year while I’ve been away all week usually make sure when you get home on a Friday night you take over for the weekend and make sure bshe gets plenty of rest
over the weekend no matter how nackered you may feel
belive me you will have. Her screaming down the phone at you and you will feel like jacking it in and going home to help her. But when your 200 miles away and out of hrs it’s not easy let her know she can ring up and vent at you down the phone. Have granparents on standyby incase they are needed during the week.
I think it is you that will suffer missing the children growing up. The woman manage and get use to you beening away. There are always other womans husbands willing to help out with little jobs, cutting the grass, fixing things that break whilst you are away from home.
miketdt:
I think it is you that will suffer missing the children growing up. The woman manage and get use to you beening away. There are always other womans husbands willing to help out with little jobs, cutting the grass, fixing things that break whilst you are away from home.
Blimey!..Nothing like throwing down a few crumbs for the green eyed monster to feed on is there!
Hi pal
when my (8 yr old) lad arrived I got made redundant (not a driving job) after 6 mths so as the missus had a good job I stayed home and played dad for 18 mth then started my driving jobs. Along came my daughter (now 3) got offered a job working away for silly money on a 6 mth contract home every 3rd weekend but over 1k per week so Mrs stayed home. now with the latest girl (6mths) as cash is very tight due to firm shutting last April (4-5 nights out driving) I got the chance of upto 5 nights out with decent money so to pay the bills and a bit left over I’m out again. The Mrs knows its all to keep a roof over us and can understand it so she’ll get used to it again. Not all women can put up with it but if you have a goodun like mine then youll decide between you what is best for you all.
If me and the G/F decide to make babies I think I’ll pack in the nights out for a bit, then go back on the nights out when they’re older, just wouldnt wanna miss any minute of my first born and would like to play a part in raising them rather than leaving the missus in the lurch. That’s just what I would do. Hopefully the economy will have improved enough that I get a decent wage on days.
Am in a similar situation, girlfriend out of work not happy at me going away, but I enjoy my job and am trying to earn as much money as I can to not only pay the bills but put some aside for savings etc.
You have to find a happy medium mate that suits you all,ive got 2 teenagers and a 2yr old,i missed most of the elder 2 growin up so when the new one came i said i wasnt gona miss out again so i just do every other night away when were busy but when its quiet im always first to get off home,the company i work for have plenty of night work so its win win for everyone if i get back every other day then my motor goes on a night run. im still earning a good wage,doing the job i love and seein plenty of the family…The above comments are right about needing a good family circle around ya for when you are away if only for peace of mind that someones near incase a problem shud arise,Find yourself a job that does just give you a couple of nights a week then you get your own space and so does the mrs and you still see them frequently. Hope everything works out for ya fella.
ive made a point of not reading the reply posts.
stressful time for you and a lot more heading youre way,youre first instinct will be we need the money.
youre right,but there are jobs/companys about that will pay you for 5/6 shifts what you get at mo.
and youll be at home all week.then the nagging starts you actually being in the house more than 30 hours a week will show you a diffrent side to her (hormones)
but then she could have a bad pregnancy gets taken to hospital an youre sitting in a cab going out youre mind with worry.
at the birth can you guarante youll be there
youre son/daughter gets taken to hospital at 3 months youre in a cab going out youre head with worry
evreytime you come home youre coming back to a stressed out woman and a child thats grown up a bit and youve missed all that, you dont get that back.
you know what you need financially a lot on here have had to make the choice youre the only one that knows whats right for you.
I’m away all week with my job on containers, but my wife accepts it. My two boys, aged 8 and 2, know that I’m away all week with my job and they are also both fine with it. Though as I’ve said to others in the not so distant past, life isnt easy. You have to make it known to your boss that when the time comes for the birth that you will be home… NO MATTER WHAT! and to expect you to drop everything and get yourself home. Your girlfriend/wife will want you there for the birth of your child.
As others have put here, there are going to be things you miss, namely your child growing up. Though there is one way round that, if your phone has picture capability then get her to send you pictures everytime the child does something new, such as sitting up, standing, walking for the first time. Also get her to send you pics on thier first day at school, its something that no father really wants to miss. I was lucky in that it was my youngests first full day this week and I am on holiday so I got to take him in, it broke my heart though when he pushed me out of the nursery class .
Just remember that you are bringing in the money and that with your wife out of work at the moment and not really going to have a chance of getting employment if the company she applies to find out shes going to be going on maternity leave 8 months later, you will do whatever it takes to keep that money up.
rocky 7:
If she new the job before she started going out with you she should accept the fact that that is how you earn your living. If she dosnt then you have to decide which you want her or the job. Just as a matter of interest there are more long distance drivers with ex wives than any other industry.
Ehhmm…she’s pregnant mate. You’re surely not suggesting he drops her and their unborn child for the sake of a job■■?
My wife had a C Section which was booked ahead of time, so we knew a day and a half in advance when the little lad was joining us. I called the boos and told him I was coming home, but the guy was a jerk. Ended up giving chase to him out the back door of the office then going home as I couldn’t catch him.
So I was jobless, but that gave me the first 6 weeks at home with my son full time, and I am convinced that my taking over all the duties from the boss lady made all the difference to my son and I. We are really really close, to the exclusion of even his mom a lot of the time. He is his fathers child, no doubt about it.
But after 6 weeks I was away 2 or 3 weeks at a time. It was awful hard, and still is, but he never forgot me in his earliest times and seemed to save his triumphs up so I could be there. Even when I went on serious time away he always wanted to be with me, so I would go away for 6 weeks then come home to an excited toddler and a grumpy wife. At least the dog and the boy were always happy to see me.
What I am saying is that you may be able to handle being away, and your lady may be able to handle it. Many can but many cannot. You need to play it by ear and see how it goes.
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