Another good job being ruined by numpties in the office

I may have mentioned before I currently drive a van, get good money and have hotels and lunch/dinner paid for. It’s a really good job and in return I will happily bend over backwards for my gaffer to help him out.

He’s recently took on a office manager who’s soul job is to come up with procedures for every task and he’s destroying what was a good company to work for.

His latest rule is that I’m no longer allowed to use my ipad as a satnav as it’s not securely attached to the screen. I usually have it sat next to me so I can hear the directions and rarely glance over at it.

Apart from saying “wtf has it got to do with you how I use my personal ipad for navigation” how would you respond to his new rule?

For anyone who thinks I’m being awkward here’s a couple of other procedures he’s came up with in the last two weeks

-no eating or drinking in company vehicles meaning I have to stand next to my van if I want a brew or sarny. I don’t

  • toilet roll replacement procedure stuck on the wall in the office, they don’t even have these in schools And I’m quite sure fully grown men know how to change the toilet roll :laughing: I’ll try and get a picture later.

He’s disliked from the labourers at the bottom of the company right upto the project managers/sales at the top and we’re all not too sure how to approach it without making waves for a boss we all like :confused:

Back in the day he would have been invited out the back for a face painting session. We had a new manager once who did nothing but walk around with a clipboard and point all day while making everyone elses life a misery. Somebody superglued his car door locks so he couldnt get in. He had stinky cheese rammed down his car air vents and in the radiator fins. Eventually he got the message and left.
Just tell your boss that the guys a knob who is going to end up costing him dear.

maga:
I will happily bend over backwards for my gaffer to help him out.

Too much information… lol :smiling_imp:

Seriously though, this whole ‘methodology’ and not allowing folks to use their own initiative is totally beyond a joke nowadays. There was a van driving job at Stafford a couple of weeks ago with a detailed list of tasks that went along the lines of.

  1. To drive van.
  2. To obey all company procedures with regards to other road users.
  3. To deliver goods as instructed.

If you had to give someone that level of guidance, would you really want to employ them as a driver anyway.

This one appears on our local jobs website… I won’t name any names , but it isnt Stobarts before anyone starts a fight.

Hgv class 1 Driver
Job description

Job Purpose:
Accomplishes job purpose by performing duties.

Duties:

  • Accomplishes organisation goals by accepting ownership for accomplishing new and different requests; exploring opportunities to add value to job accomplishments.

  • Updates job knowledge by participating in educational opportunities; reading professional publications; maintaining personal networks; participating in professional organisations.

Skills/Qualifications:
Teamwork, Emphasising Excellence, Initiative, Leadership, Customer Service, Listening, Supply Management, Reporting Skills, Presentation Skills, Verbal Communication, Written Communication

when u away from base m8 sit in van eating /drinking ipad for sat nav just keep it clean smile at said as… wen at base ur boss prob appreciate be pleased if u have quiet with few work mates for moral support gd luck. :smiley:

How I miss the days of simple English, common sense and initiative. All of this ‘Americanese’ as I call it it getting rediculous. So much pointless managerspeak and in-phrases just makes me want to ‘project my balanced apendage in a proactive manner facilitating direct interaction inside the box’. eg kick somebody up the ■■■.

Sounds like you have a proper gaffer. Ask him if you all would get a pay rise if you could save the company 30 grand plus a year. Then say the job worked great for years so sack the pen pushing oink. All these people do is try and justify their jobs by saying you can’t do yours.

I’ve come across this a few times. They tend to change/introduce procedures early on as a way of justifying their job, remember the BSometer would have been on full gas at interview. In my experience they will either calm down, when they realise their job is secure, or move on when the boss realises they are a tool the company could do without.
You can either ride it out, and ignore his rules, or go have a chat with the boss.

Its called micro management, and when the ■■■■ hits the fan the person will be long gone.

maga:
His latest rule is that I’m no longer allowed to use my ipad as a satnav as it’s not securely attached to the screen.

Watch his head explode as you inform him that having a satnav on the windscreen in the area of the swept wiper blades where it impedes the drivers vision is actually illegal. Ask him where else you could place it which is actually legal.

Trukkertone:
This one appears on our local jobs website… I won’t name any names , but it isnt Stobarts before anyone starts a fight.

Skills/Qualifications:
Teamwork, Emphasising Excellence, Initiative, Leadership, Customer Service, Listening, Supply Management, Reporting Skills, Presentation Skills, Verbal Communication, Written Communication

To be fair you actually do all of that or should be doing as a HGV driver in your daily work. You probably just don’t realise you are as instead of calling it a long stream of bollox you know it as “getting on with the job.” :smiley:

Teamwork: Getting Forkies to do your bidding.

Emphasising Excellence: Getting a 44 tonne artic into a yard designed for horse and cart

Initiative: Knowing when to turn the radio/cab phone off and how to disappear off the Traffic Office radar because you know you’re going to get a crap job next.

Leadership: Organising yard staff at a drop.

Customer Service: Listening to goods in and politely nodding your head in agreement instead of inserting your fist in their face which is the primary overwhelming urge at the time.

Supply Management: Fuelling the truck, checking the oil.

Reporting Skills: Filling in vehicle check sheet

Presentation Skills: Telling everyone in the Drivers Waiting Room how you once ran out of time on a loading bay, called the police who put chalk round your wheels and told you you couldn’t move for 11hrs.

Verbal Communication: Blagging security to let you through the gate when you’re half a day early for a timed delivery.

Written Communication: The completely unbelievable yet still remotely possible reason you write on the back of the tacho print out as a reason for why you went a nanosecond over your hours.

'Reporting Skills: Filling in vehicle check sheet

Presentation Skills: Telling everyone in the Drivers Waiting Room how you once ran out of time on a loading bay, called the police who put chalk round your wheels and told you you couldn’t move for 11hrs.

Verbal Communication: Blagging security to let you through the gate when you’re half a day early for a timed delivery.

Written Communication: The completely unbelievable yet still remotely possible reason you write on the back of the tacho print out as a reason for why you went a nanosecond over your hours.’

Brilliant - love it -priceless!!

Steve

Conor, well said