Right then, I was going to ask if I could join this club but I think you lot are far to jovial, cause I bloody hate xmas.
Wasn’t always like it mind, been trying to remember when things changed, could be after a awful life changing experience
parked on the outskirts of Brassington one snowy freezing night just before xmas in 75/76.
Dog tired:
Right then, I was going to ask if I could join this club but I think you lot are far to jovial, cause I bloody hate xmas.
Wasn’t always like it mind, been trying to remember when things changed, could be after a awful life changing experience
parked on the outskirts of Brassington one snowy freezing night just before xmas in 75/76.
[/quote]Blimey!
You took a risk there lad, human sacrifices were not unknown in the village back then. I won’t ask about the ‘life changing experience’ you had but I’m assuming that you have got used to the webbed feet and hands by now, and the green skin colour fades with time…I think?
Ribbit!
Pete.
windrush:
Dog tired:
Right then, I was going to ask if I could join this club but I think you lot are far to jovial, cause I bloody hate xmas.
Wasn’t always like it mind, been trying to remember when things changed, could be after a awful life changing experience
parked on the outskirts of Brassington one snowy freezing night just before xmas in 75/76.
[/quote]Blimey!
Pete.
Anyone who parks on the outskirts of Brassington on a dark night deserves all he gets! And what do you mean by ‘back then’, Pete - I thought it still does happen!
That’s perhaps why he fled all the way to Devon - - - - and I’m writing this from Spain!Steve
mushroomman:
pv83:
Muckaway:
We had the “we’ve given you some free christmas cards and a crap biro now give us your bank details” letter from some charidee today. Thanks, that’s a couple of quid saved towards my nominated charidee. My beer fund.Just think of all the good deeds being done by your donations…right…[zb] that
Better to put " return to sender" on that envelope I reckon…“Return To Sender”
And before anybody suggests anything, I can’t see G.O.M. lending him his pencil.
LENDING■■? LENDING■■? no no, it’s doesn’t work like that in Yorkshire, we don’t DO lending but, we’re not heartless miserable Scrooges, I’ll HIRE him a pencil. £1 an hour, payment in advance. 
It’s not just flaming Xmas - the wife’s birthday is January 6th. For the last 6 years I’ve given her the same card ( I sneak it back and hide it) and her Chrissy present and birthday present are combined. I might live in East Anglia but I am a Scot. Jim.
windrush:
We went out for a drive yesterday from the holiday cottage and spotted Boundary Mills at Colne, “We could have a look in there to kill some time” Mrs W said and, being a keen shopper, I eagerly agreed. Cars were parked in every available spare piece of road and grass verge, car park was full and so was the coach park! Absolute bedlam inside, no room between the ailes to get her electric chair through and no chance of actually seeing anything! I used the loo and we returned to the car empty handed, nipped down to the onsite chippy and had a takeaway instead! “Christmas is over a month away, why are folk shopping so early” she asked, a bloody good question!Pete.
I really do hope that’s a joke Pete.
grumpy old man:
mushroomman:
pv83:
Muckaway:
We had the “we’ve given you some free christmas cards and a crap biro now give us your bank details” letter from some charidee today. Thanks, that’s a couple of quid saved towards my nominated charidee. My beer fund.Just think of all the good deeds being done by your donations…right…[zb] that
Better to put " return to sender" on that envelope I reckon…“Return To Sender”
And before anybody suggests anything, I can’t see G.O.M. lending him his pencil.LENDING■■?
That’s the spirit G.O.M., isn’t this what Christmas is all about,… making money. 
grumpy old man:
windrush:
We went out for a drive yesterday from the holiday cottage and spotted Boundary Mills at Colne, “We could have a look in there to kill some time” Mrs W said and, being a keen shopper, I eagerly agreed. Cars were parked in every available spare piece of road and grass verge, car park was full and so was the coach park! Absolute bedlam inside, no room between the ailes to get her electric chair through and no chance of actually seeing anything! I used the loo and we returned to the car empty handed, nipped down to the onsite chippy and had a takeaway instead! “Christmas is over a month away, why are folk shopping so early” she asked, a bloody good question!Pete.
I really do hope that’s a joke Pete.
A joke? No, I do all the shopping anyway and quite enjoy it to be honest. I don’t ‘window shop’ though, just go for what we require and then back home again, I had enough of being dragged around shops as a kid by mother and luckily Mrs Windrush feels the same and is happy to let me do it all. 
Pete.
I recycle gifts, but a word of warning if you say it with flowers; Remove any cards attached to the bouquet. Mrs Muckaway does not appreciate reading how sorry people are that she was buried two days ago. 
I’m with you there Pete , I don’t mind doing the food shopping , I’m there and back double quick . If i take 'er indoors though she has to inspect every shelf in case she sees something she might need , and it takes forever . Dave
W.T.F.
I have just been watching the telly and THE BOXING DAY SALE at Bed’s ‘R’ Us starts tomorrow.
Popped into me local Tesco’s yesterday at around 3pm, now normally this always is the most quiet time of the day (I always try to avoid the herd…) but not yesterday though…people were already going up and down the place in some sort of “panic” state, plundering the shelfs, and race about with those bloody carts…
And when my ankles were attacked for the fifth time by some ■■■■■■■ blind old bird, I’d had enough, and told her where to shove it! That didn’t end well though, the manager came round to sort things out, turns out, I’m banned now from the shop…that for speaking the truth…what’s the world coming to eh 
BAH HUMBUG!
pv83:
Popped into me local Tesco’s yesterday at around 3pm, now normally this always is the most quiet time of the day (I always try to avoid the herd…) but not yesterday though…people were already going up and down the place in some sort of “panic” state, plundering the shelfs, and race about with those bloody carts…And when my ankles were attacked for the fifth time by some [zb] blind old bird, I’d had enough, and told her where to shove it! That didn’t end well though, the manager came round to sort things out, turns out, I’m banned now from the shop…that for speaking the truth…what’s the world coming to eh
BAH HUMBUG!
Haha, great, welcome to the club. A few years ago (I was young , foolish and impetuous), I was ‘invited to leave’ by the security staff at Asda, Dewsbury.
I’ve never been noted for my tolerance, but I was having a bad day when I kicked off verbally.
My dear wife then said (after we’d left) “don’t EVER suggest or think about coming shopping with me again” Then she called me some terrible, harsh names. 
Objective achieved then GOM , I could stand the terrible names from swmbo if i could only be banned for lfe from shopping . dave
I was dragged kicking and screaming to shop for xmas cards ( you need to come , you haven’t bought mine yet ) I ended up stood outside after some stupid cow with a huge backpack clobbered me as she turned round , again , and my temper finally snapped and we had words , most of mine being , in her words " very insulting " . To top it all 'er indoors had a go at me for " embarrassing her " . I’m becoming a fan of online shopping where you don’t need to meet the terminally stupid . bah humbug , dave
rigsby:
I was dragged kicking and screaming to shop for xmas cards ( you need to come , you haven’t bought mine yet ) I ended up stood outside after some stupid cow with a huge backpack clobbered me as she turned round , again , and my temper finally snapped and we had words , most of mine being , in her words " very insulting " . To top it all 'er indoors had a go at me for " embarrassing her " . I’m becoming a fan of online shopping where you don’t need to meet the terminally stupid . bah humbug , dave
It’s great to see the spirit of our late great friend, “Dave the Renegade” lives on in this thread, ( I’m not a member but), the banter is magic!!! Merry Christmas you miserable bunch. Regards Kev.
Hello Kevin, Dave, and GOM. On shopping several men in my area with bags in their hands always say My wife thinks I a bloody donkey, I told them to join the heel haw club. Sandman Norman. 
kevmac47:
rigsby:
I was dragged kicking and screaming to shop for xmas cards ( you need to come , you haven’t bought mine yet ) I ended up stood outside after some stupid cow with a huge backpack clobbered me as she turned round , again , and my temper finally snapped and we had words , most of mine being , in her words " very insulting " . To top it all 'er indoors had a go at me for " embarrassing her " . I’m becoming a fan of online shopping where you don’t need to meet the terminally stupid . bah humbug , daveIt’s great to see the spirit of our late great friend, “Dave the Renegade” lives on in this thread, ( I’m not a member but), the banter is magic!!! Merry Christmas you miserable bunch.
I thought you were on the naughty step when you wouldn’t join us . I’ll make sure santa doesn’t call at you’re house . dave
rigsby:
kevmac47:
rigsby:
I was dragged kicking and screaming to shop for xmas cards ( you need to come , you haven’t bought mine yet ) I ended up stood outside after some stupid cow with a huge backpack clobbered me as she turned round , again , and my temper finally snapped and we had words , most of mine being , in her words " very insulting " . To top it all 'er indoors had a go at me for " embarrassing her " . I’m becoming a fan of online shopping where you don’t need to meet the terminally stupid . bah humbug , daveIt’s great to see the spirit of our late great friend, “Dave the Renegade” lives on in this thread, ( I’m not a member but), the banter is magic!!! Merry Christmas you miserable bunch.
I thought you were on the naughty step when you wouldn’t join us . I’ll make sure santa doesn’t call at you’re house . dave
Dave, I am shocked and surprised that you have not been “banned” from shopping? I have been on the “you’re not coming shopping with me ever again” ban for over 5.5 years and we have only been together for 6 yrs,get it sorted mate you are more than halfway there!
Kevmac you ARE a member I’m sorry to say as when you post on this thread it is automatic membership! Bah Humbug