Contraflow:
F-reds:
Dipper Dave - clearly the sarcasm of your post didn’t quite ooze off your post onto some people’s screen+1
Why is it always the agency drivers that end up spitting their dummies out and crying into their milk? They’re a sensitive bunch, aren’t they?
You never see us proper lorry drivers with proper jobs getting our knickers in a twist when it’s the other way around.
Harsh but Fair 
Talking of tail lifts…
About 25 years ago I was driving a 7.5 tonner with a tail lift one day and delivered quite a lot of stuff to a shop in Cheetham Hill. As I was folding the lift away (I had just got it into the vertical position and all I needed to do was raise it) the shop owner asked if I wanted a brew? I did, and then 10 mins later I came out, got into the cab and drove away.
“BANG” went the noise and I stopped…the tail lift platform was lying in the road…I hadn’t raised it, and the bottom had caught the tarmac almost as soon as I’d moved.
Ah well…nobody’s perfect! 
CF - you are a b aaaaaaad man!
I mean, chimp.
8wheeler tipper + agency driver=
One was told to follow me to a site because he didn’t know the area. Half way there he overtakes and disappears. I get to site, no sign of him.
Next day I get a phone call asking why I didn’t wait for said driver, who got lost and tipped at the wrong farm. And got stuck.
Another one who was proud to’ve been “ex Tesco” (keyword is “ex”) was told “stay on the road, the shovel will bring the soil to you.” Just what part of that he didn’t understand was never ascertained, but he got very muddy struggling with the towing eye.
Why are some Muppets -oops I mean T.Ms dumb enough to hand over the keys to a piece of kit worth £3K and a load of a similar value to a man that they have never seen before?
Radar19:
Agency guys don’t get assessments, agency guys don’t get training. All they get is a set of keys and told to get lost.
Sainsbury’s, Dartford…4 hours assessment then another 7 hours induction
I’m an agency driver simply because it suits my lifestyle, I get bored very easily so like variety.
I don’t consider myself to be an agency muppet as I’ve had 32 years experience on just about everything but I have to admit there are a lot of muppets working for agencies and a lot of it is the agencies fault. At my recent assessment there were three of us, one had been banned from driving in Poland but agency still thought he could drive over here, the other one got 24 minor faults and was also shown the exit.
Dipper_Dave:
bobbya:
Dipper_Dave:
Nope quite common amongst agency muppets …To be fair the company should provide training for agency folk new on the job on how not to reverse into walls / hit buses / wear Hi Viz all the time / limp, and generally make a nuisance of themselves whilst getting paid more than everyone else…
Top tip for agency folk: Buses on M’ways and D/C’s may be going slower than you, the clue is they keep gettin bigger when in front of you.
Typical boring reply when you mention agency drivers,no I’m not an agency driver,that agency driver could have been a full time employee somewhere last week and got made redundant so only filling in time waiting for another position,we’ve all had bad days,I actually feel for the bloke.
Fair comment, as I’m also ex agency theres some irony in my original post (the extra pay bit).
To be fairer I agree we have all had bad days, well some nightmares in fact. It happens and we just move on and are thick skinned enough to cope.An agency bods life in general is a happy one (when theres competing agencies or a regular gig), they are not only better equipped for multiple assigments but have a wide variety of awareness of different operational procedures and vehicle types / combinations.
Its often surprising to me why they get so much flack, perhaps its regular drivers jealous or compensating for something or maybe one bad experience tars them all with the same brush. One thing I know for sure is when i was agency i had to put up with all the other drivers moaning and looking down on me whilst I was earning more than they where. Didn’t bother me much though as I’m the only one feeding my family and I couldn’t give a toss. This mantra I also use in my now full time position - I get the job done, I cover my arse and i feed my family- if I make friends on the way thats great but its not essential.
Course with my agency experience I am confident in my abilities to know i could drive any vehicle presented to me, yes even a non synchro eaton twin spliter / Maggy Deutz / Scammel etc,
Agency drivers do get a rough deal on here and most are more than capable of replacing any regular driver. But there are some real muppets out there that we can all take the ■■■■ out of providing we are self confident enough to take the ■■■■ out of ourselves as well.
Thus endeth the lesson…
Oh and cheers F-reds
[bear with me I’m multi editing my spelling / grama misstokes due to excessive vodka and red bull, omg the cat is going to get a right shafting tonight]
What a brill speach, could not of said it better myself, yes we do get some sheds to drive and i have been with a firm for the last few months roping every pallet especially today in heavy rain but i don’t moan. most of the chaps doing supermarkets would have a stroke on some of the jobs the agency lads are willing to do because they are not scared of graft. speaking for myself i just go and get the job done as the family come first. i have worked for company’s full time but choose to work for agencys because its better money if i want a day off, i dont need some arrogant 20 year old telling me im not having it off. its not like the old days loads of work now of the agencys. 
wing-nut:
Radar19:
Agency guys don’t get assessments, agency guys don’t get training. All they get is a set of keys and told to get lost.Sainsbury’s, Dartford…4 hours assessment then another 7 hours induction
I’m an agency driver simply because it suits my lifestyle, I get bored very easily so like variety.
I don’t consider myself to be an agency muppet as I’ve had 32 years experience on just about everything but I have to admit there are a lot of muppets working for agencies and a lot of it is the agencies fault. At my recent assessment there were three of us, one had been banned from driving in Poland but agency still thought he could drive over here, the other one got 24 minor faults and was also shown the exit.
we had an agency sent in when I was employed full time,he could not speak any English and climbed into the passenger side thinking that’s where the steering wheel was,1 min later he was walking out the yard
Most of the trucks i have seen on there side are the big name company’s ARGOS, STOBBARTS and the chaps are in uniform so i don’t think they was Agency drivers. 
Dipper_Dave:
Nope quite common amongst agency muppets …
There’s a guy who works at a parcel company I drive for occasionally who is renown at the hub for hitting just about everything. I watched him one night at the start of his shift as he hooked up the red suzi and the whole lot started rolling down the yard into the fence. Didn’t even come as a surprise. He’s not agency. That did come as a surprise.
Radar19:
Agency guys don’t get assessments, agency guys don’t get training. All they get is a set of keys and told to get lost.
Must be imagining the driving assessment I got and the 8hrs induction I had in August at Howdens Joinery before I could even start work there and the 1hr vehicle familiarisation course they did with me at the beginning of December for the new DAF CFs they got before they’d let me drive one.
F-reds:
Careful sensitive people could be reading
Careful, sensitive people would probably prefer reading to driving. 
I have only ever worked for 1 agency, worked for them twice, first time for 2 years, second time for just a couple of weeks til I got a new job. Neither time did I get an assessment.
Just a license check and asked a couple of questions. But we did get free DCPC training.
I am almost an ADI, test in Feb. When I go it alone, in April, I was gonna offer to do their assessments for them.
Dipper_Dave:
Agency drivers do get a rough deal on here and most are more than capable of replacing any regular driver.
This. 100% this.
This is why full time workers are so threatened by Agency workers. Because the full time workers have their tricks and their little ‘things’ so they know how to do just enough without doing too much.
On my first day with one company, I took out a 7.5t on local deliveries. Left the yard at 7am got back at 10 am. TM saw me, and gave it ‘wtf you doing here? You got lost?’ to which I handed him all the signed notes, and the collection notes for a collection I did and he looked at me dumbfounded. ‘How many drops you have? 3?’ ‘No, I had 6 drops and the collection. Why, is there a problem?’ ‘umm, no.’ He turns and gets yardies to load me up for second drop.
Head yardie comes to me and says ‘You impressed him. regular guy wouldn’t be back till 1pm.’
Loaded for Gloucester run, left 10:30am, back at 3pm. Which is when the regular guy would just be getting to Glos.
They took me on, gave me a regular run in Oxfordshire. Regular guy on Wilts and Glos run did not speak to me for a month, and suddenly got a bit quicker for a few weeks.
There are 2 types of agency. The D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.'s, and the Workers.
The dilligafs are there because they have to be. They resent working, they know best all the time and will not listen to experience.
The workers, are the ones that want a full time job. Most agency workers don’t want to be agency workers, and when they do work for a company they like, they tend to try to impress. This in turn annoys the full time staff. So agency are hated for doing a crap job, and hated for doing a good job. We can’t win.
Clunk:
Dipper_Dave:
Agency drivers do get a rough deal on here and most are more than capable of replacing any regular driver.This. 100% this.
This is why full time workers are so threatened by Agency workers. Because the full time workers have their tricks and their little ‘things’ so they know how to do just enough without doing too much.
On my first day with one company, I took out a 7.5t on local deliveries. Left the yard at 7am got back at 10 am. TM saw me, and gave it ‘wtf you doing here? You got lost?’ to which I handed him all the signed notes, and the collection notes for a collection I did and he looked at me dumbfounded. ‘How many drops you have? 3?’ ‘No, I had 6 drops and the collection. Why, is there a problem?’ ‘umm, no.’ He turns and gets yardies to load me up for second drop.
Head yardie comes to me and says ‘You impressed him. regular guy wouldn’t be back till 1pm.’
Loaded for Gloucester run, left 10:30am, back at 3pm. Which is when the regular guy would just be getting to Glos.
They took me on, gave me a regular run in Oxfordshire. Regular guy on Wilts and Glos run did not speak to me for a month, and suddenly got a bit quicker for a few weeks.There are 2 types of agency. The D.I.L.L.I.G.A.F.'s, and the Workers.
The dilligafs are there because they have to be. They resent working, they know best all the time and will not listen to experience.
The workers, are the ones that want a full time job. Most agency workers don’t want to be agency workers, and when they do work for a company they like, they tend to try to impress. This in turn annoys the full time staff. So agency are hated for doing a crap job, and hated for doing a good job. We can’t win.
Down to a tee!
Not read the whole thread, but back in about 1980 I was agency and for about 6 months I was almost perm into a builders merchants in Failsworth. In the 1st month I had to be towed out of a hole that the leccy board had dug, (it then rained), a double puncture on the R/O/S, a really smoking engine that ended up with a new engine and being lifted out of a ditch (back wheels only) by a JCB. They still wanted me back. I only left to go F/t on class 1.
Back in the day when there were real lorries and real drivers 
I did three jobs for Murfitts thru an agency down to Italy. Later applied to them direct, got an immediate start, wonder why? but had to do a two day induction!
