jmc jnr:
Kev, the Chemo is making everything shrink! Jim.
I bet it will still glow in the dark Jim.
Cheers Dave.
Please Dave, enough with the glowing in the dark bit. For my diagnosing I had to go the the nuclear medicine dept. at St James Leeds for a full body bone scan " Now Brian, Iām just going to inject you with this RADIOACTIVE tracer, donāt go near pregnant wimmin or children for a while"
Wait a minute says I, Iāll just check with the wife to make sure sheās not pregnant> At least we all had a laugh about that, the poor old soul is 75.
How about we become a tag team Brian. You with your Radio-active Tracer, and me with my Light-Sabre - bring on the Storm troopers.
The JADED NIGHTS thatās us. Jim.
Hi again
To Harryā¦ā¦ my 80th was earlier this month, being apprenticed until I was 20+ I did have an army medical, was not graded 1 and placed on reserve for call up, conscription was being wound down about that time, late 1955ish.
To Pete(windrush)ā¦.overpaid, well for many weeks previous Iād had my nose against the local saddlerās shop window, eyes on a football which was duly bought out of that first wage, not a lot of change either. On arrival home, my mother said now then, āIāll be needing some dig money aff yeā, cue red face and unease, āI canna gie ye dig money, Iāve spent it on a fitbaāā¦ āWeel yeāll tak it back and get yer moneyā, this was going to be a serious loss of face specially as Iād been already showing off to some mates. My reluctance to co-operate fired her into action and she took the ball back and got the money, a week or two later I was able to āaffordā it.
What I forgot to mention was my junior clerking was at the goods yard side of the station, a hive of industry in them days, one of my tasks was to go to the shunter shed, (still steam, diesel hadnāt arrived yet) and collect the incoming waybills, these were tickets that were pinned under a spring clip on the goods wagons with details of where from, what the cargo was and the consignee, all to be written into a ledger, now this had to be done with pen and ink, yes nibbed pens and inkwells, my writing left a lot to be desired and often drawn attention to, blots everywhere which I was pretty good at. Being an agricultural area there was plently of machinery and animal feedstuffs shipping out and in on lorries, in particular names like Bibby, Silcock and SAI (Scottish Agricultural Industries) also the railway motors, Mechanical Horse and 4 wheel Dennis.
Oily
Hi Oily,
I lived at an old working corn mill until I was six years old, only a mile from where I live now. My Dad drove a lorry by day and milled corn in the evenings, only a few cwt. An oil engine drove the mill stones then, as the wooden mill wheel was worse for wear.
I remember Railway lorries bringing fertilizer up there in spring and summer to store in the warehouses there. They came from Kington railway station, about 7 miles away. I think they were old Fords and one Bedford O type artic, this being about 1951/2. As a young kid in an isolated place I looked forward to seeing the lorries coming and going, plus the two lorries that were based there that belonged to the firm that my Dad worked for.
Cheers Dave.
Dave the Renegade:
Hi Oily,
I lived at an old working corn mill until I was six years old, only a mile from where I live now. My Dad drove a lorry by day and milled corn in the evenings, only a few cwt. An oil engine drove the mill stones then, as the wooden mill wheel was worse for wear.
I remember Railway lorries bringing fertilizer up there in spring and summer to store in the warehouses there. They came from Kington railway station, about 7 miles away. I think they were old Fords and one Bedford O type artic, this being about 1951/2. As a young kid in an isolated place I looked forward to seeing the lorries coming and going, plus the two lorries that were based there that belonged to the firm that my Dad worked for.
Cheers Dave.
Hi Dave, I have faint recollections of Kington in the 70s, that was on our route from Oxford to Gilfach yr Halen(between Aberaeron and Newquay) where we rented a holiday bungalow 6 or 7 years on the trot, kids were young and loved the place. Furthest on the 44 with a wagon was Leominster a few times with cars from Cowley.
Oily
A couple of year ago GOM, bless him started a thread āA bit of fun for us old ladsā good idea but lacked support, like I mentioned on there I have a bit oā a collection of jokey stuff and as this thread title mentions wit, well hereās one to be going on with.
Oily
A woman in her 50s went to the plastic surgeon for a facelift. The surgeon told her about a new procedure he was offering called The Knob, this would be semi-implanted in the back of the head and with slight periodic adjustment would tighten the skin and do away with sagging and wrinkles. She was very pleased with the results over the following years but as time wore on she got a bit concerned about a couple of developments in her appearance and back she went to the surgeon for a consultation and possible remedy. She said āIts these terrible bags under my eyesā the surgeon had a look and said āmadam these are your breastsā to which she replied "guess thereās no point asking about the goatee then "
Originally posted this in the āSouthampton Driversā thread last week but perhaps in the circumstances, me being an old git, it is probably better suited here.
Being a Southampton (postcode) lad I thought this might be the place to mention that I have just received my HGV licence renewal reminder, which means I have now had a HGV licence for 50 years. Not sure if I am boasting or complaining . I remember going to āThe Castleā HQ of the Hampshire County Council in February 1965 with proof of being over 21 to get Heavy Locomotive on my licence (I think that was the lorry class back then). The next day I was driving a 14 ton Bedfort tipper. Since then I have driven most marques and combinations and, assuming I pass the medical and renew, still have a ācasualā job running to Turkey (from Bulgaria) as and when required when Iām not in the UK.
I realise I am but a youngster compared to some on here but having done the job for fifty years I hope I might just scrape in on the thread tearms and conditions.
Dave the Renegade:
Hi Oily,
I lived at an old working corn mill until I was six years old, only a mile from where I live now. My Dad drove a lorry by day and milled corn in the evenings, only a few cwt. An oil engine drove the mill stones then, as the wooden mill wheel was worse for wear.
I remember Railway lorries bringing fertilizer up there in spring and summer to store in the warehouses there. They came from Kington railway station, about 7 miles away. I think they were old Fords and one Bedford O type artic, this being about 1951/2. As a young kid in an isolated place I looked forward to seeing the lorries coming and going, plus the two lorries that were based there that belonged to the firm that my Dad worked for.
Cheers Dave.
Hi Dave, I have faint recollections of Kington in the 70s, that was on our route from Oxford to Gilfach yr Halen(between Aberaeron and Newquay) where we rented a holiday bungalow 6 or 7 years on the trot, kids were young and loved the place. Furthest on the 44 with a wagon was Leominster a few times with cars from Cowley.
Oily
Just trying to remember who the Morris dealers were in Leominster. Bengryās were Peugeot and now Ford and Mazda dealers. Watson are Foed dealers. Canāt remember if Fryers were in Leominster, but you will tell me Oily. Several of the garages in Leominster closed and trade as other businesses nowadays.
I have never bought a vehicle from Leominster. Tracy bought her last car from Bengrys. Iāve bought my vehicles from Hereford or Kington, and a couple from Ludlow.
Cheers Dave.
oiltreader:
A couple of year ago GOM, bless him started a thread āA bit of fun for us old ladsā good idea but lacked support, like I mentioned on there I have a bit oā a collection of jokey stuff and as this thread title mentions wit, well hereās one to be going on with.
Oily
A woman in her 50s went to the plastic surgeon for a facelift. The surgeon told her about a new procedure he was offering called The Knob, this would be semi-implanted in the back of the head and with slight periodic adjustment would tighten the skin and do away with sagging and wrinkles. She was very pleased with the results over the following years but as time wore on she got a bit concerned about a couple of developments in her appearance and back she went to the surgeon for a consultation and possible remedy. She said āIts these terrible bags under my eyesā the surgeon had a look and said āmadam these are your breastsā to which she replied "guess thereās no point asking about the goatee then "
You called??
It was entertainment night at the Senior Citizensā Center.
After the community sing-along, led by Alice at the piano, it
was time for the star of the show - Claude the Hypnotist!
Claude explained that he was going to put the whole audience into a trance.
āYes, each and every one of you and all at the same time,ā said Claude.
The excited chatter dropped to silence as Claude carefully withdrew, from
his waistcoat pocket, a beautiful antique gold pocket watch and chain.
āI want you to keep your eyes on this watch,ā said Claude, holding the watch
high for all to see.
āItās a very special and valuable watch that has been in my family for six
generations,ā said Claude.
He began to swing the watch gently back and forth while quietly chanting,
āWatch the watch ---- Watch the watch ---- Watch the watchā
The audience became mesmerized as the watch swayed back and forth.
The lights were twinkling as they were reflected from its gleaming surfaces.
A hundred and fifty pairs of eyes followed the movements of the gently
swaying watch.
They were hypnotized.
And then, suddenly, the chain broke!!!
The beautiful watch fell to the stage and burst apart on impact.
āS**T,ā said Claude.
It took them three days to clean the Senior Citizensā Center and Claude was
never invited there again.
A mother-in-law stopped by unexpectedly the recently married coupleās house. She knocks on the door, then immediately walks in. She is shocked to see her daughter-in-law lying on the couch, totally naked.
āWhat are you doing?ā she asked.
āIām waiting for Jeff to come home from work,ā the daughter-in-law answered.
āBut youāre naked!ā the mother-in-law exclaimed.
āThis is my love dress,ā the daughter-in-law explained.
āLove dress? But youāre naked!ā
āJeff loves me to wear this dress! It makes him happy and it makes me happy.ā
The mother-in-law on the way home thought about the love dress. When she got home she got undressed, showered, put on her best perfume and expectantly waited for her husband, lying provocatively on the couch.
Finally her husband came home. He walked in and saw her naked on the couch.
āWhat are you doing?ā he asked.
āThis is my love dress,ā she replied.
āNeeds ironing,ā he says" āWhatās for dinner?ā
Dave the Renegade:
Hi Oily,
I lived at an old working corn mill until I was six years old, only a mile from where I live now. My Dad drove a lorry by day and milled corn in the evenings, only a few cwt. An oil engine drove the mill stones then, as the wooden mill wheel was worse for wear.
I remember Railway lorries bringing fertilizer up there in spring and summer to store in the warehouses there. They came from Kington railway station, about 7 miles away. I think they were old Fords and one Bedford O type artic, this being about 1951/2. As a young kid in an isolated place I looked forward to seeing the lorries coming and going, plus the two lorries that were based there that belonged to the firm that my Dad worked for.
Cheers Dave.
Hi Dave, I have faint recollections of Kington in the 70s, that was on our route from Oxford to Gilfach yr Halen(between Aberaeron and Newquay) where we rented a holiday bungalow 6 or 7 years on the trot, kids were young and loved the place. Furthest on the 44 with a wagon was Leominster a few times with cars from Cowley.
Oily
Just trying to remember who the Morris dealers were in Leominster. Bengryās were Peugeot and now Ford and Mazda dealers. Watson are Foed dealers. Canāt remember if Fryers were in Leominster, but you will tell me Oily. Several of the garages in Leominster closed and trade as other businesses nowadays.
I have never bought a vehicle from Leominster. Tracy bought her last car from Bengrys. Iāve bought my vehicles from Hereford or Kington, and a couple from Ludlow.
Cheers Dave.
Hi Dave, did a bit oā googling and Fryers were in Leominster and had MG connections, good chance it was them as MG saloons were made at Cowley. In the 60s/70s the model range ADO16 (Issigonis design with Moulton hydrolastic suspension) covered badges Morris, MG, Wolseley and Riley at Cowley . Another bit of useless informationā¦The MG factory at Abingdon made the MG and Austin Healey sports cars, also ran lines on the Morris 1000 Traveller, the Morris 1000 van was on occasions also made there.
Oily
Dave the Renegade:
Right chaps, get the gardening gear ready, warmer weather on its way. Could be our short lived summer.
Cheers Dave.
Hiya,
Iāve got a rake to freshen up the three inches of gravel that totally covers my
rear garden and a stiff brush and a hose pipe to clean my flag and concrete
front garden the lot takes about ten minutes, my greenhouse has become an
overspill annexe for my garden shed and is in need of several panes of glass,
it will most likely finish up in the skip later this year.
thanks harry, long retired.
man after my own heart harry , my back garden is reclaimed paving slabs with a couple of small flower beds for her ladyship . i bought a jet wash thing , so it gets a blast in spring along with the caravan and thatās the extent of my gardening . if we were meant to garden we would have feet on our knees . cheers , dave
rigsby:
man after my own heart harry , my back garden is reclaimed paving slabs with a couple of small flower beds for her ladyship . i bought a jet wash thing , so it gets a blast in spring along with the caravan and thatās the extent of my gardening . if we were meant to garden we would have feet on our knees . cheers , dave
When l bought this house, the previous owner had pointed out the low maintenance block paved driveway and footpaths to the front. I spent four hours yesterday with a wire brush cleaning the aforementioned!!! I think he missed his vocation in life. He would have made a fortune as a banker mis selling insurance. Regards Kev,
Dave the Renegade:
Right chaps, get the gardening gear ready, warmer weather on its way. Could be our short lived summer.
Cheers Dave.
Gardening Stop trying to frighten an old man.
Maintenance free at the manor house in Dewsbury, concrete back yard, 6 tonne of Wickes finest beach shingle in the front garden (and a few all weather bushes). Prune the bushes at the end of Octoberā¦job done.
" Now Brian, Iām just going to inject you with this RADIOACTIVE tracer, donāt go near pregnant wimmin or children for a while" 
"
