peirre:
I was wondering if Phillip Phlop the Ltd Co agency limper might chance their arm and apply for a government loan, then once the money is in the bank grab the next available flight out of Blighty with the money in the back pocket.
“Strategic Default” is easier done by someone who already lives abroad, and is only over here for the work…
Not pointing any fingers like - you could be an ex-pat - right?
toby1234abc:
tmcassett , if you’re worried about Winseer turning it into 15 pages , Carryfast will be along shortly to make it 20 pages involving the CCP , A Frame trailers and driving an Austin Allegro Vandan Plas luxury model with a square steering wheel and luxury leather stitching .
Please don’t mention British Leyland or Arthur Scargill .
There’s a good chance of mentioning me 15 times per page - without any of my posts counting towards that total…
idrive:
Conor:
idrive:
You will be pleased to know that Ltd companies and sole traders have last week been issued with loans of up to £50k by the government.
These loans are based on neither tax paid nor turnover, as they are self certified on application to the bank with no checks for business account holders.Err wrong. They’re actually based on turnover and you can only get a maximum of 25% of your turnover up to a maximum loan value of £50k. So for your typical Ltd co driver they’ll get maybe £8k-£10k tops. You also have to prove that turnover and posts on forums such as Moneysaving Expert from people who have been turned down have already appeared. Not only that you have to pay the money back and the government will only compensate the banks once they’ve exhausted all usual legal avenues to recover the money so without a CCJ they’re unlikely to be able to put in a claim to HM Treasury.
Meanwhile the Ltd Co driver who wasn’t using the low pay and dividends model will be getting 80% of what they declared, able to furlough themselves as long as they wish and without having to pay a single penny of it back. In addition to that they’ll also be able to apply for the same Bounce Back Loan as the tax dodgers you mentioned.
Err, not wrong. The point being the turnover is self certified. The banks do not check the turnover figure or do any other checks beyond the statutory AML and KYC checks which consists of a soft credit search to validate id and address.
Yes banks will have to “pursue defaulters” before passing the debt to the government but the normal rules such as CCJ will not apply to these loans and it’s likely that only a few letters sent out will be the threshold to return the debt to the government who can then collect with teeth, if the entity still exists.
The CBILS loan that preceeded this with an 80% guarantee had a 40% rejection rate by the banks on application, as these included the normal affordability and credit checks. Bounce back loans do not and the banks are handing them out to all comers with all info self certified via a check box on a form.
The only income checks carried out are for people without a business account such as sole traders who have traded through a personal account and now need to open a business account. They are being asked to provide a tax return as proof of trading. If you already had a business account in any shape or form, it’s help yourself.
The self employment grant which launches tomorrow is based on average trading profit (not turnover) over a three year period. This will be calculated by HMRC.
They will then pay 80% of this for a three month period only, so 25% of 80% of the average profit of the last 3 years tax returns.
Just think… If the Government can get a Bank to lend 50k to someone who then uses it to pay themselves, and presumably pay tax & Nics on it, before defaulting the entire loan for whatever reason…
The Government hasn’t lost, the Taxpayer definitely hasn’t lost, and the Punter (worker) didn’t neither.
What a wheeze of the Government to make some of that mis-appopriated taxpayer’s money used to bail out the ungrateful banks 12 years ago - making it flow back the other way like this huh?
My suggestion to small sole traders and businesses - is don’t even borrow these “loans” unless you have an exit strategy that facilititates “strategic default”, such as “I’ve already bought my villa in spain” or something similar…
Can you imagine the NIL interest the general public will have in chasing the 21st century version of “Costa Del Criminals”, bearing in mind that to Rob a Bank these days - no longer needs a sawnoff, but just a few bits of paperwork filled in!. 
Wots a “Soft Credit Search” btw?
Polite notice to whinger and any other person who what to post stuff about self employed stuff
START YOUR OWN ‘ING THREAD !
This is about full time employed staff
Not self employed and LTD limpers
So go forth and multiply
Sent while in furlough
toby1234abc:
tmcassett , if you’re worried about Winseer turning it into 15 pages , Carryfast will be along shortly to make it 20 pages involving the CCP , A Frame trailers and driving an Austin Allegro Vandan Plas luxury model with a square steering wheel and luxury leather stitching .
Please don’t mention British Leyland or Arthur Scargill .
In fairness it was probably harsh of me saying it will turn into “15 pages” more than likely 3 or 4 but it might as well be 15 when you consider the length of his posts! 
peirre:
I was wondering if Phillip Phlop the Ltd Co agency limper might chance their arm and apply for a government loan, then once the money is in the bank grab the next available flight out of Blighty with the money in the back pocket.
I think you have to pay business rates to qualify, as in have premises.
In fact those who have set themselves up as Ltd’s when they really are s/e sole traders are going to get squat, so wife tells me - she does this accountancy stuff for a living.
Socketset:
peirre:
I was wondering if Phillip Phlop the Ltd Co agency limper might chance their arm and apply for a government loan, then once the money is in the bank grab the next available flight out of Blighty with the money in the back pocket.I think you have to pay business rates to qualify, as in have premises.
Socketset:
In fact those who have set themselves up as Ltd’s when they really are s/e sole traders are going to get squat, so wife tells me - she does this accountancy stuff for a living.
SOCKETSET ! CAN’T YOU READ FFS !
blue estate:
Polite notice to whinger and any other person who what to post stuff about self employed stuff
START YOUR OWN ‘ING THREAD !
This is about full time employed staff
Not self employed and LTD limpers
So go forth and multiplySent while in furlough
tmcassett:
toby1234abc:
tmcassett , if you’re worried about Winseer turning it into 15 pages , Carryfast will be along shortly to make it 20 pages involving the CCP , A Frame trailers and driving an Austin Allegro Vandan Plas luxury model with a square steering wheel and luxury leather stitching .
Please don’t mention British Leyland or Arthur Scargill .In fairness it was probably harsh of me saying it will turn into “15 pages” more than likely 3 or 4 but it might as well be 15 when you consider the length of his posts!
I’m guilty of re-quoting the posts of others, that tend to overly fluff-out the length of that “reply” post.
Others re-quoting ME though - What’s their excuse? 
A vicar went into his church and he was praying to God. While he was praying, he asked God, “How long is 10 million years to you?”
God replied, “1 second.” The next day the vicar asked God, “God, how much is 10 million pounds to you?”
And God replied, “A penny.”
Then finally the next day the vicar asked God, “God, can I have one of your pennies?”
And God replied, “Just wait a second.”
“If you owe the bank £100 that’s your problem. If you owe the bank £100 million, that’s the bank’s problem.”
“The best way to teach your kids about income tax is by eating 40% of their ice cream.”
– Bill Murray
toby1234abc:
tmcassett , if you’re worried about Winseer turning it into 15 pages , Carryfast will be along shortly to make it 20 pages involving the CCP , A Frame trailers and driving an Austin Allegro Vandan Plas luxury model with a square steering wheel and luxury leather stitching .
Please don’t mention British Leyland or Arthur Scargill .
The Vanden Plas version didn’t have the famous “quartic” (ie square) steering wheel…
Sent from my VOG-L09 using Tapatalk