Another two from the Trucknet Archives.
A short story.
Postby dm46 » Sat Jan 24, 2009 3:46 am
In the early 90s I worked for a Dutch firm bringing veg and fruit back and forth to the UK markets fairly mundane at the time, However on one occasion I had to load apples in Zwindrecht Holland for the Western fruit market.
The only thing that was unusual was they were from Iran, They had been transported to Holland by an Iranian Company and transhipped into my fridge.
The exporter I was told will meet me at the collection point and accompany me to London in the truck.
He was a nice chap Iranian by birth and I think tried to convert me religiously by the time we made Zeebrugge for an early evening crossing.
Had a few hours sleep on the boat and in dover for 10pm ish, on waking this guy was sweating profusely and I asked him if he was ok, He said he felt a bit rough from the crossing, so I didn’t think any more of it till we came off the ferry and parked waiting for customs.
By this time he was shaking and sweating I thought he was having a heart attack, and at this point he undid his briefcase and took a cocktail of tablets.
He locked up his case and said he needed fresh air and said he would walk it off round the terminal.
He had been gone 10 mins when the pager went off to report to customs, on doing this they told me they wanted me on the bay and were was my passenger? I told them he felt rough and was walking round the compound they said they would find him I had to go on the bay now and before I knew what was happening the rummage squad was in the trailer.
I thought christ this is looking serious ( drugs or what ) they put the dog in and it went bloody loopy, I am then thinking goodbye freedom, Hello jail.
The senior customs man asked me to open the cab so they could check his contents as he hadn’t been found still and broke into his briefcase which had a wad of cash in and tablets galore, Hmmm said customs man not looking good is it son.
I had to go round to the back of the fridge and watch this dog wag its tail off climbing all over the boxes of apples, they then sent for the port police to track my passenger who was hanging over a wall and arrested him, They give him the full monty on the strip search and went were no man wants to go if you know what I mean.
After what seemed like hours they established the dog was going mad due to what I understand was DDT or similar, the chemical they spray on the fruit which its use is banned in europe, and they all calmed down and said no further action was to be taking it was all now fine.
We cleared customs and arrived in Western late, after what seemed like days with this guy going on about ringing the Embassy the Queen and Maggie Thatcher about his disgust with the way he was violated in our country.
The Importer was waiting to unload his chemical laden apples, and then the importer and exporter went at each other because we were late, I was peed off by now and wanted some sleep.
So I thought I would speed things up by saying it was just one of those things at customs it happens all the time its not unusual for them to release dogs on the cargo, He climbed on the top of the pallets and saw oily foot prints from the dog’s and prompty rejected the whole load.
Funny isn’t it the things you learn about peoples religions after you put your foot in it.
They dont mind chemicals on the apple but wont tolerate a dog on the box !!
dm46
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And one from Wheelnut but you must remember that this story happened decades before lorries had microwaves.
Postby Wheel Nut » Thu Jun 26, 2008 8:25 am
Im sure I have told this tale before. A couple of blokes I know who worked for the swiss tanker company Bertschi.
Simmo is from Balderton, Ginger is from Skelmersdale.
Everybody who Keith Simmo meets and talks to is known as Blue. 
So Ginger and Keith are going into Swiss, they do the clearance and head off to their depot. On the way Ginger pulls up at a supermarket and tells Keith he is just going to grab a chicken for supper.
So Ginger nips off and Keith decides to get something too, Keith runs in, gets a case of beer and his food and follows Ginger to the depot
15 minutes later they are parked up and talking through the window, Keith passes his mate a beer as Ginger is chewing on a cooked chicken leg. Keith than grabs his shopping bag, pulls out a fresh chicken and said
“How did you cook that then Blue?”
Where are you now Blue?