ezydriver:
… Robert Horne paper (no longer trading)…
Ah, that explains it.
I dropped some crated special paper at a Robert Horne depot in the North East, twice.
I got banned from there, twice 
After the second delivery I never went back 
The first time.
I turned up with these crates on a Euroliner, I’d loaded them in Germany.
Found the place, parked outside, walked in, in yellow gitd vest, found the right person no problem and handed over my paperwork.
“Reverse it straight in here drive”, nice easy reverse in.
“Would you open the side so we can see what we’re getting drive?” So I did. It’s a Euroliner, with all the boards fitted, aluminium. We also use clamp-on, cross member, load securing boards. To remove these clamp-on boards, I opened a back door and jumped up inside. Then I hear “OI, YOU, GET OUT OF THERE”. I realised they meant me, so I removed the clamp-on boards anyway, then get down. “You’re not allowed in the back of your trailer”, I was told. So I start taking the side boards out from the ground, two complete sections have to be removed because the roof post will have to be moved. The last one to come out has jammed, so I hit it. Bugger me if it doesn’t just pop straight out, slide down the board I’m holding and take a chunk out of my arm. So I’m dancing around, cos it stung, shaking my arm and splashing blood about, cursing under my breath about their damned stupid Health and Safety Rools.
Next thing I hear, “I don’t like your attitude, take it away”. “Brilliant, with pleasure”, I said. Picked up the boards, threw them in the trailer, shut the curtain and drove out. I pulled up round the corner, to refit the boards the easy way, from inside. I’d better let the boss know I thought. 2 hours later, if you apologise, they’ll take that stuff off. So I went back. They took it off. I’d removed all the boards again, the easy way, before I went back in.
The second time.
I’d collected their crates of paper. Then I’d collected a touch screen, free standing, computerised, tourist information point. A large L shaped thing. I’d wrapped it in cloth and tied it to a clamp-on board, very close to the back door. I turned up at the same Robert Horne depot, thinking I remember this place. So before going in, I removed almost all the side boards I needed to, including the clamp-on boards, so I’d untied this information computer. Same script as before, gitd vest, walk in with paperwork, reverse in here drive, in it goes, easy.
Can you open it up drive? As I’m opening the curtains, the same forkie is chatting with his mate. I gesture towards the information computer and tell him about what it is, please take care because there isn’t a lot of room, as I’m taking out the 1 board left in the section. He nods. I take out the 1 board left in the next section and put it on the floor. As I turn back, I realise he’s caught the computer somehow and is dragging it towards the edge. So I yell “WOAH!” and stick both arms straight up in the air. He turns from his mate towards me but carries on moving backwards. I shout “STOP!” this time, which he does, but its too late, the computer topples off the edge. I go and have a look, it’s a bit battered 
So we have to complete an accident report. The last line of my accident report read. ‘I expected a company with a Health and Safety regime like this one, to have fork lift operators who didn’t require being led by the hand when unloading’. Funnily enough, I’ve never been back.
I also learned that the rules about being on the trailer was ONLY when the sides are open. I only opened the curtain before I was ready, because I was specifically asked to. And the side wasn’t wide open either, because it still had load security boards fitted.
gitd = glow in the dark 