This is exactly why I say that maintenance payments should have nothing to do with visitations. I think you should write a letter. He’s probably not expecting to hear from you, and a phone call out of the blue might not give you the reaction you want. We don’t always react the way we should or even the way we really feel when we get a shock like that. A letter won’t put him on the spot, and will give him time to think and decide how he really feels. If he’s any kind of dad at all, he’ll call you once he reads it. Keep in mind that he could be feeling a lot of guilt about all this, so be patient. Some things take time to make right.