My 78 yr old uncle definitely a character I can’t remember all he told me .
He once had a blow out on his 8 wheeler Erf A series tipper ,he changed the wheel and let the knackered tyre go down the embankment and across a field 
then the police arrived oh dear ,he put his foot in and had to fetch it back 
.
Then somewhere in Stoke a large Rsj fell of the top of a load of scrap and hit a brand new ice cream van pushing the engine & gearbox backwards ,the ital drive says what a happen uncle says I don’t know I just managed to miss it it came off a lorry in front .
Another time with his f88 the brakes wouldn’t come off and he’d got the cab up and was under it when they came off and it rolled away on to a bowling green ,next thing he hears is a bloke shouting about the mess ,uncle says not as much mess as I’am going to make as he sets off and screws it round 
Then there was the curtain sider , so he going down the m5 early one morning when his m8 rings up and says have you lost some wooden stairs ,no he’s says don’t be daft I’ve got a curtain sider now ,when he gets to Bristol the back door had rolled it’s self up and sure enough a flight had gone .
Also there’s the man from Longton that didn’t pay his bill ,he got a wire rope fastened to his jaguar back axle when he came out the pub the rope knocked a long brick wall down ripping the axle off the jag 
One Saturday morning he set off for London as usual with the tacho turned off but with the card in when after 5 miles he got a tug off the law but luckily got away with saying he’d forgot to put the card in .
When they were building the sewage works in Ashbourne he got waved in by the police in his 6 wheeler Guy going from Ballidon with a load of stone knowing he was a ton over he turned in off the road but rather than stopping went up to the sewage site and tipped some off ,when he came back to the main road the policeman was angry but never realised what he’d done 
Once he got stopped over weight at the coldra but got away with swapping a 1 tonne pack of timber with the ministry man who wanted to build a fence in his garden .