Efes. Yes, whatever happened to John Preece. Action is definitely needed to track down this fugitive. So here goes!!
WANTED (preferably alive).
JOHN PREECE.
Last bit of hearsay had him in Tasmania 1990 ish.
Distinguishing marks. Big and Ugly. Talks with an Australian accent especially when telling his Bruce and Sheila jokes.
Occupation. Lorry driver, drinker and general all round funny man (unless depressed).
If anyone see’s this man approach with extreme caution. He is well known for getting workmates drunk and locked up in jail. He may also fry you a breakfast. Avoid this as his eggs are always well out of date. If he wants to bath with you ask him to keep his shorts on. If you want to go a few rounds with him in the ring thats fine but wear your aftershave. He’s a poser and will lay down at the first sniff of scent. Do not go to sea with him as his hero is Captain Ahab of Moby ■■■■ fame. If you do, watch out for his harpoon.
Finally. Do not take your donkey anywhere near him unless you’re happy with it ending up with three legs. I’m sure I wasn’t deaf until I did a trip to Kurdistan with him.
