Suicide by truck

Same advice as others, seek professional help and talk to friends and family who will listen, so at the very least they know a bit about what’s going on in your head in case you’re acting differently to usual. I had a pretty traumatic event last year, not the same as you but rocked me all the same, and I should have got help far sooner than I did. I ended up worrying a lot of friends and family because I closed up, didn’t talk to anyone and just focused on an ever decreasing spiral of ■■■■ thoughts in my head. From my point of view I thought I was doing absolutely fine until I realised one night I really wasn’t, so make that step. And yes, going to the GP and asking for help from mental health services will probably feel ■■■■ to start with, I felt like I didn’t deserve their help, there were people far worse than me etc etc. but they were great and they’ve been a good part of my recovery so far. All in all, don’t bottle it up, talk to people you trust and ask the professionals for help.

And on robroy’s point, people really don’t think rationally when they’re in that state, or most of them wouldn’t even be trying to kill themselves at all. All that’s going through their heads is “Big lorry heavy and fast, I’m small and squishy, almost certain of success, rock on”.