This is going to sound mad but, for those of you looking for work, please read your CVs before you send them out to the company you are applying to
So far this week I have had ones that consisted of -
Please give me a job, i’m wonderful, and that was about it…
I’m ex army, based near Hereford but not allowed to talk about it
I’m independant, articulate and could do your job better than you do <— That may be true but can you drive a lorry??
She/he has worked hard/maintains great work relationships (please delete where necessary) <—From a guy
Is it so hard to read them yourselves or get someone you know to check it over? I’ve removed the spelling mistakes from the quotes because I’m not asking for Shakepeare to drive my lorry (he couldn’t spell either, including his own name) but basic grammer, not being a nob and some explanation of what you have done would be a distinct improvement
Most probably the ones sending duff cv’s are the ones that drive while wearing a hi visibility don’t knock me down bib and sleep in it for safety. Covered in axle grease .
I applied for the position of a glider engine testing engineer and chicken teeth remover but didn’t get both jobs .
I got the job of fitting the sat nav in the Costa Concordia but that didn’t end too well, well on the rocks anyway.
No takers for missing the Herald by two minutes ?
I think my CV could be better, and might have a mistake or three, but I kind of think it’s a bit disingenuous to pay someone to work it over professionally. That and i’m quite tight fisted. More that, probably!
Are you hiring for FT? Last I noticed you were after a PT / Casual. I’m not that far from Lambourn if it’s based around there. Hopefully my CV is a bit better than those you’ve mentioned…!!
CV needed to drive a truck.
Employed by XYZ from-to job role truck driver duties required truck driver.
As opposed to we need drivers desperately do you have the required licences do you have DCPC can you provide ID, NI number and DBS.
The office will give you the keys to the truck and tell you what you will be doing.
Driver shortage bs.
It does make you wonder how the standards have dropped and companies will hire anyone that can’t read and write, this would explain all the bridge bashing if they can’t read or calculate metric and imperial from their in cab height marker .
It’s possible that the cv’s sent in , are indeed the bridge bashers or the BBC : Bridge bashers club .
Or ask what to wear at interviews, what is the best sat nav , what is the best route from London to Reading?
Never had a CV, or interviews even! Most jobs given over phone, or more lately social media, believe it or not . Think the last time I went to an interview was 2001 For Clarke’s of London. And I don’t see me ever having to again since at this stage I’m a transport industry legend of great (in)fame(y). You may kiss the ring Trucknet peasants
This is going to sound mad but, for those of you looking for work, please read your CVs before you send them out to the company you are applying to
So far this week I have had ones that consisted of -
Please give me a job, i’m wonderful, and that was about it…
I’m ex army, based near Hereford but not allowed to talk about it
I’m independant, articulate and could do your job better than you do <— That may be true but can you drive a lorry??
She/he has worked hard/maintains great work relationships (please delete where necessar) <—From a guy
Is it so hard to read them yourselves or get someone you know to check it over? I’ve removed the spelling mistakes from the quotes because I’m not asking for Shakepeare to drive my lorry (he couldn’t spell either, including his own name) but basic grammer, not being a nob and some explanation of what you have done would be a distinct improvement
Sorry for the whinge. I shall keep on reading…
You should be thanking the second one for telling you he’s ex-army. At that point you could file his CV in the bin and move onto the next applicant as all ex-forces drivers can’t drive for [zb] in civvy street. I’d rather take my chances employing an EE with a licence out of a Cornflakes box than ex-forces.
Don’t automatically dismiss those applicants who can’t string a sentence together on paper. I do the driver recruitment at our place on the rare occasions we advertise and I can tell you that it’s driving experience that matters rather than their written English language/grammar standard. The CV from one of our drivers was laughably bad with shocking spelling, nonexistent grammar and random words missing from sentences. I was ready to file it in the round basket but it was the only application I had on my desk at the time so with nothing better to do I rang him for a chat. Turned out he’d been driving tractors on their rural family farm since he was a wee boy, plus 25 years doing livestock transport to and from the markets and also animal feeds to farms. Didn’t have any tanker experience but 25 years experience driving on farm roads is not to be ignored. Took him on and he’s taken to the job like a duck to water. Not a single issue or bit of damage in over 5 years now.
We have taken on a few EEs over the years but every one has proven to be [zb] and caused thousands of pounds worth of damage and nearly lost us customers . I’m sure there are probably good EE drivers lurking out there somewhere, but we’d rather not take that chance with our expensive equipment trying to find that 1 decent guy when the other 10 are ■■■■ so any CV with an EE sounding name goes straight in the bin.
You should be thanking the second one for telling you he’s ex-army. At that point you could file his CV in the bin and move onto the next applicant as all ex-forces drivers can’t drive for [zb] in civvy street. I’d rather take my chances employing an EE with a licence out of a Cornflakes box than ex-forces. quote bracewell…
sits and awaits the maoster and many other ex service people
This is going to sound mad but, for those of you looking for work, please read your CVs before you send them out to the company you are applying to
So far this week I have had ones that consisted of -
Please give me a job, i’m wonderful, and that was about it…
I’m ex army, based near Hereford but not allowed to talk about it
I’m independant, articulate and could do your job better than you do <— That may be true but can you drive a lorry??
She/he has worked hard/maintains great work relationships (please delete where necessar) <—From a guy
Is it so hard to read them yourselves or get someone you know to check it over? I’ve removed the spelling mistakes from the quotes because I’m not asking for Shakepeare to drive my lorry (he couldn’t spell either, including his own name) but basic grammer, not being a nob and some explanation of what you have done would be a distinct improvement
Sorry for the whinge. I shall keep on reading…
You should be thanking the second one for telling you he’s ex-army. At that point you could file his CV in the bin and move onto the next applicant as all ex-forces drivers can’t drive for [zb] in civvy street. I’d rather take my chances employing an EE with a licence out of a Cornflakes box than ex-forces.
Don’t automatically dismiss those applicants who can’t string a sentence together on paper. I do the driver recruitment at our place on the rare occasions we advertise and I can tell you that it’s driving experience that matters rather than their written English language/grammar standard. The CV from one of our drivers was laughably bad with shocking spelling, nonexistent grammar and random words missing from sentences. I was ready to file it in the round basket but it was the only application I had on my desk at the time so with nothing better to do I rang him for a chat. Turned out he’d been driving tractors on their rural family farm since he was a wee boy, plus 25 years doing livestock transport to and from the markets and also animal feeds to farms. Didn’t have any tanker experience but 25 years experience driving on farm roads is not to be ignored. Took him on and he’s taken to the job like a duck to water. Not a single issue or bit of damage in over 5 years now.
We have taken on a few EEs over the years but every one has proven to be [zb] and caused thousands of pounds worth of damage and nearly lost us customers . I’m sure there are probably good EE drivers lurking out there somewhere, but we’d rather not take that chance with our expensive equipment trying to find that 1 decent guy when the other 10 are [zb] so any CV with an EE sounding name goes straight in the bin.
The training of HGV drivers for the military is outsourced to civilian firms the same as the one that trained you, so perhaps your licence also came from the a cornflakes box
I wonder how many of those CVs were from Job Centre applicants with no interest in ever getting a job, but have to send in a CV to keep the dole / beer money flowing.
I guess theres a line between really crap and ones like Mick mentioned where they likely didn’t get much education but have great practical skills. Sounds like most of those however were doleites without a licence.
As for the ex army one - little tip, you’d think they would be great at organising…nah, really, nah!
Good luck with your search. Of course, if you were offering £15 hour and a furnished 3 bedroom house included then I might apply (couldn’t afford to rent a haybale in the corner of a barn down there). But at least my CV would have the correct speilings.
Mick Bracewell:
I do the driver recruitment at our place on the rare occasions we advertise and I can tell you that it’s driving experience that matters
The training of HGV drivers for the military is outsourced to civilian firms the same as the one that trained you, so perhaps your licence also came from the a cornflakes box
Another of those who expects someone else to provide their pool of labour with experience.
How will any driver get the required ‘experience’ if every employer takes the same view that they won’t employ anyone without ‘experience’.
But I can see how a soldier, who joined up to be a soldier not a driver and who’s been trained to a class 3 licence standard as part of the job.
Ain’t the same thing as a class 1 RCT/RLC driver, who joined up to be a driver, and who has to first be trained as a soldier.
Drove tank transporters etc etc but not enough ‘experience’ to do multi drop retail or building deliveries with an 18 tonner.( Luckily ).
