You have omitted Mr Smelly who has an allergy to hot water, soap and B.O spray.
When he leaves the cab with the odour of stale sweet , you get in and the dead badger smell goes on you too.
Mr Been There And Done It and Got The Tee-shirt .
He has done the Middle East when you were still in your Dads bag.
Single handedly disarmed 12 Gendarmes who pinned him against the trailer .
Got shot at by the Taliban and Al Queada in the desert in a Morrison’s day cab with no bunk .
Mr Dobuin , he will Dob you in to the TM or MD as carries their golf caddy for them, you can’t miss him , as brown fudge on his long nose .